While piling on Agent Foxtrot, I think people are forgetting to slam the Asbestos Mango. Isn’ t that what’s being done in the pit? So I guess I have to do that: Mango, if you don’t want to flirt, tell the poor guy, instead of just dropping cryptical hints like “I don’t need help, do your job.”
Oh and what’s so bad about flirting anyway?
With that, I’ll leave the field to the more proficient flame-meisters on here.
Damn, you’re a pissy little bitch, aren’t you? I thought the OP was quite funny. But I suppose when you saw Cervaise’s famed telemarketer post, you thought he should have just written, “I don’t like telemarketers”?
Loser.
SOLDIER #2: It could be vacuumed by an African swallow!
SOLDIER #1: Oh, yeah, an African swallow maybe, but not a European swallow. That’s my point.
SOLDIER #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that.
SOLDIER #1: But then of course, uh, African swallows are non-migratory, so why would they need the wristbands?
Or maybe Agent Foxtrot was the one who was supposed to be emptying the trash instead of following the OP around like a lost puppy. 
That’s one good thing about the clooless guy…at least he wasn’t Slamming the Asbestos Mango.
Dolphins smart. Dolphins use Roomba. Look, no hands!
I was thinking of a replica of a tropical fruit, made out of fire-resistant but carcinogenic fiber, mysteriously imbued with intelligence, mobility, opposable thumbs, and a pretty respectable sense of humor. 
You’re lucky I’d already swallowed my mouthful of tea before I read this. Hot chai tea out the nose woulda hurt. Not to mention a nasty mess on the keyboard.
The Pit has a rich history of threads such as this: wordy, amusing and biting. I see nothing wrong with the OP. I found it to be funny and fitting the Pit tradition. Counting the words in the OP and saying that there were too many of them was beyond absurd. (Reminds me of the King saying, “Too many notes.” in Amadeus.)
What’s so cryptic about telling him to go away and do his job? Only a moron would not figure out that she wanted him to go away and do his job.
Uh, perhaps the fact that he wasn’t being paid to flirt, he was being paid to do his job, which he wasn’t doing. Oh, and that the supervisor is looking to fire (or severely reprimand? something bad, anyway) employees who are socializing when they are really supposed to be, you know, doing their job?
The guy in the OP is probably composing a post about how he is “too nice” and the bitch is probably going off to get picked up by an abusive drunken biker who’ll treat her like crap and toss her aside like a cigarette butt out of his Camaro and girls just don’t appreciate nice guys.
Are you suggesting that mangos migrate?
Actually, the one thing I took from the OP was that you’re far too intelligent to be employed just pushing a vacuum cleaner.
Most unintentionally ironic statement of the day.
Yeah, well, tell that to the dozens of other potential employers I applied to before I finally broke down and took the temp job.
I take the National Certification Exam for Massage Therapy this Friday.
Then I get to start the whole licensing process.