Depends.
Do they track down my high school friends? I’d be crucified in seconds: massive drug use, alcohol abuse. But no sex scandals.
Do they track down my high school friends? Ooops: massive drug use, frequent alcohol abuse, casual sex. But no extremist political statements, protests, or radical email postings.
Do they research my years since school? Bummer: less massive drug use, but some alcohol abuse, premarital sex, divorce, post-marital sex of all kinds with multiple partners, radical political statements and protests, radical email postings, membership in SDMB.
Moral of this study: I’d better set my political ambitions low, maybe topping out at local councilperson.
Not much. Right now, simply put, I couldn’t run; I’m not old enough. But, assuming I reach 35, and that the 14 years between then and now are boring, there’d still be some pretty big problems.
I don’t have any of the traditional problems: no drug use, hardly any alcohol use–I’ve never even been remotely drunk–I haven’t killed anyone, I haven’t skipped out on military service, there aren’t any divorce records, I haven’t pissed anyone off too badly, no family ties to espionage or anything goofy like that (my dad and my uncle have/had security clearance, and my dad’s was Really Effin’ High back when he had it (I don’t think he does anymore)). There are a few problems, though. . .
I’ve said, on more than a few occaisions, that communism is, to me, in theory, a great idea. Nevermind that I said that I didn’t think it was feasible in this day and age. You think they would care that I qualified it? I can just see the leader on the 9 o’clock news…
Also, I am a member of a minority religion. There is a large contingent of otherwise sane, reasonable, and pleasant human beings who would become outraged at the idea of my becoming president based solely upon that one fact. I mean, let’s face it, “Soccer Moms” and “NASCAR Dads” aren’t about to vote for a Wiccan candidate, regardless of my economic platform or whatever.
I’d be busted for my fake ID I used to get on the ticket (I can’t run until 2012).
But I’m sure that my friendships alone would get me laughed off the ticket, and a few pictures that are/were out of my control (never let an ex keep pix), and a few relationships most of Conservative America would find abhorrently offensive (though legal in some states).
That and they’d ask me why I spent so much time wasting online at the SD.
Me? Forget it. One doesn’t become a member of certain 12 step groups without having fulfilled the eligibility requirements for said groups; usually with pain, sorrow and a paper trail.
How would I handle it? I think rather well, but I would not carry a single district since “handling well” that kind of scrutiny in my case would involve not just telling the scrutinizers to shove some generic “it”, but being explicit on what is the “it” to be shoved, where and in what direction should it be shoved, how often, and what flavored lubricant would be best…
Seriously, though, some of the things they could “dig up” about me would be easy for me to dismiss: “Pot? Hell yes. In college, early 80s. Damn right I inhaled. Haven’t done any since early '83, figured I could get far more f**ked up for less money and hassle on beer. Got a problem with that?” Some others would be a bit more labored (Q: “How come you’re a 43-year-old male who has never been married?” A: “Would you believe I scare them off with my gargantuan size?”).
Of course, if my downfall is because someone fishes out the dirty cartoons pseudonymously posted to the 'Net… at least that should mean a publishing contract for those
Firstly, I’m not eligible to hold the Presidency, due to age requirements.
Secondly, my views on social issues kill me among Republicans, my views on finance and spending do among Democrats, and my lack of a partisan identity hurts me with all parties.
Finally, I don’t have the temperment to handle campaigning well.
If they stuck to the TRUTH, I think they would have a hard time coming up with any dirt. I don’t drink or do drugs and never have. I’m still a virgin so there certainly aren’t any sex scandals. I haven’t made any extremist political statements.
Of course, I’m sure my rivals would come up with SOMETHING to use against me, even if they had to make it up.
Let’s see. My personal life is so bland that a friend once called me “white bread with lips.” I’m okay in that department.
Never been in trouble with the law worse than a speeding ticket, so I’m okay there.
Twice married, once divorced. That could be a problem with some people.
Some youthful college hijinks but they’re long past.
Now let’s look at my emplyment history. I had a long career in public relations, which makes me a lacky of Big Business. Now I work for a non-profit advocacy organization which makes me a tax-and-spend liberal.
Just a word of clarification: Imagine folks like Rush Limbaugh and G. Gordon Liddy or Al Franken and Jim Carville having access to that secret dossier on you.
Imagine an entire political party devoted to unearthing everything it can about you, including their private investigators talking to old friends and older nemises.
I lied in order to get my California driver’s license renewed. The lie would be that I live in California at all. As you can see from my location, I live in Illinois. Since I don’t even have a car, I didn’t think it was a big deal and I wanted a valid driver’s license when the old one expired.
Also, I never filed my California income tax in 2003. I lived in California for the first half of 2002 and Michigan for the second half. You can only file two tax returns at a time at taxactonline.com, so I filed the MI and federal returns. I did do my CA taxes (I owed $1) and really intended to file the thing but it slipped my mind and I never did it and now the info has disappeared into the ether. I think about this from time to time. I feel guilty about it but honestly have no idea how to rectify the situation. I hope Arnold Schwarzeneggar doesn’t come after me for that one dollar.
Um, also I swear a lot, have no patience, and have a tendency to say what I think. Not good political material.
Like many of those who’ve posted, my present is fairly respectable on its face.
Because of my past, though, my running mate would need to be some subhuman combination of Hunter S. Thompson and Wilt Chamberlain* to make me look even remotely electable.
*This having nothing to do with basketball, you understand.
I’d last 5 seconds, max. I haven’t knowingly killed anyone (yet), but that’s about the only flag that wouldn’t come up. Like most of the rest of the posters here (and let me tell you, it’s threads like this one that make me proud, damn proud to be a Doper!) my life has been littered with booze, porn, drugs, adultery, rampant weasel abuse, and taking Og’s name in vain.
Wait a minute…I could run as a Democrat!
My past is okay–solid middle class upbringing, put myself through college (scholarships helped), minor alcohol use, very little pot, sex within relationships, no felonies, no addictions, no photos.
However, for the last 8 years I have been employed by labor unions, and am currently a labor lawyer for a local of the largest union in the ALF-CIO and believe that unions are an intregal part of our system of capitalism. I’ve been a member of the ACLU for 12 years, I contribute regularly to Public radio, am on the legislative action team for my local Planned Parenthood, I’m currently boycotting all Coca-Cola products, have been known to contribute to both the Sierra Club and the Nature Conservatory, and subscribe to both the Unte Reader and the New Yorker. Oh, and I’ve never been married, but I’m straight.
Nah, I’d get buried over bad grades. My opponents would say, “Would you want the country run by a ‘C’ student? Remember the LAST time that happened?” and people would think I’m just another George W, an halfwitted imbecile who aims low and takes what he can get.
Also when I was young there was stuff involving masturbation and scrambled porn…I’m sure that doesn’t fly in politics :eek:
Withstanding media scrutiny is dependent on how you respond to what they have on you. If you’re running on a platform of legalizing marijuana and recognizing gay marriage, and the separation of church and state… an expose on you being a pot smoking bisexual atheist isn’t going to hurt your campaign very much. It’s kind of like revealing that the candidate for the communist party is a communist.
If you’re comfortable with your life, people dredging out the highlight reel shouldn’t be a problem.
