You can't fool me, there ain't no Sanity Clause. (A Marxist thread)

“Baravelli, you’ve got the brain of a four-year-old child, and I bet he was mighty glad to get rid of it.”

“You know you haven’t stopped talking for a moment since I came here? You must’ve been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.”

“I’ll meet you tonight, under the moon.
Tonight, tonight, when the clouds are creeping around the moon, I’ll be creeping around you.
I can see it now, you and the moon. You wear a necktie so I’ll know you.”

[sub]paraphrased becuase it’s been years since I’ve seen whichever movie this comes from[/sub]

“Hold me. Closer, closer, closer.”
“If I were and closer I’d be behind you.”

I love the Marx Brothers’ early Paramount films: but at MGM, they made Harpo into a harmless little faun, Groucho became avuncular, and they threw in Cute Singing Lovers no one cared about . . . And don’t even get me started about how MGM stole sexy, feisty Jeanette MacDonald from Paramount, sewed her vagina shut and stuck in in those operettes with Dudley Do-Right!

“This morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.”

Is my Aunt Minnie in here?

I never forget a face - but in your case I’m willing to make an exception.

Hey you! I told you to slow that nag down. On account of you, I nearly heard the opera!

“The pig an unclean animal? Why, the pig is the cleanest animal there is–except my father, of course.”

Groucho after being handed a bill at a restaurant:

“18.53? That’s outrageous!”

(Hands it to his female dinner partner)

“If I were you, I wouldn’t pay it!”

"Whatever it is, I’m against it! "
(which could be my personal motto, to bad I can’t find a Latin translator for this. [sub]hint hint [/sub]

“I could dance with you till the cows come home. On second thought, I’d rather dance with the cows when you came home.”

And two hard-boiled eggs.

“I’ll teach you to kick me.”
“You don’t have to – I already know how.” [Kick]

“Room Service? Send up a larger room!”

“I love sitting on your lap. I could sit here all day if you didn’t stand up.”

Outside of a dog, a book is mans best friend. Inside a dog, it’s too dark to read!

“The party of the first part…”

To quote Harpo: " "

Your eyes, they shine like the seat of my blue serge pants.

“Anybody want to buy a duck?”

I love my cigar, but I take it outta mouth once in a while.

“That’s not a reflection on you - it’s on the pants.”

“You try to cross over there a chicken, and you’ll find out why a duck. It’s deep water, that’s why a duck.”