You find $100,000 in cash. What do you do about it?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Let’s say that, taking your paper and plastic to a community recycling bin one weekend, you notice an old, ragged, bulging satchel on the ground beside it. There’s a notice warning people not to do that, but since you didn’t leave it there you decide to let it be. A week passes, and you come back with more recyclables. The satchel is still there, and it’s in your way. Moving it aside, you notice that a, under a ton of filthy clothes and other crap, what looks like a twenty dollar bill. Looking inside you find many more such bills–everything from fins to C-notes. Nobody’s around, so you take it home and count. There’s nearly a hundred grand in the bag.

What do you do, and why?

2

Keep it and invest it in blue chip stocks (if there are any left that are in positive territory) and wait five years.

Then I buy a boat and go to Tahiti and lie in the sun, spending as little as possible so that it will last the rest of my life.

3

Hand it in to the police, obviously. If unclaimed I can keep it, if claimed then the rightful owner is reunited with the money. It may even turn out to solve a crime.

However this answer is contingent upon a couple of things: firstly, that I and those close to me are financially secure, and secondly that I have a reasonable trust in the state and police service to do something sensible with it.

If, for example, the money was just going to be confiscated, I’d probably have to think a bit more carefully…

4

But only if it was a poor person who lost it. :stuck_out_tongue:

5

More importantly, from my perspective, handing it over to the police make keep me from being implicated in a crime. If we make the assumption that the police could potentially link it to a crime then we have to assume that they could potentially find out when I try to deposit the cash in my account. I don’t want them knocking down my door because I’m connected to cash taken in a violent armed robbery. Telling them “I just found the money!” isn’t likely to carry much weight.

6

If I found someone’s wallet, containing money or not, I would pride myself in returning wallet - or taking it to police station like Happy Poster described.

For this scenario though, I would keep the cash and keep my mouth quiet about having found it.

Afterall, if the money was turned into police, and no one claimed the cash, and if I were then somehow allowed to keep it, I would also be obligated to notify the IRS - the police would have made a report the unclaimed money went to me.

7

Vegas, baby!

Seriously, I’d “launder” it through a few casinos, declare and pay taxes on maybe a third of it, and spend the rest as cash over the next decade or so.

8

I’d call the cops in case it was evidence or stolen or something. Otherwise I think I’d be afraid that the person who lost it was going to be looking for it/me with a particularly nasty, rabidly homicidal look in his her eye.

But firt I’d call a lawyer to find out if there are any “finders keepers” laws that would work in my favor if the money was never claimed.

9

Nowadays I’d always be nervous that this would set Anton Chigurh on my scent.

10

I’d race home and stash the money somewhere safe. I’d wait for nightfall and then drive to the other side of town and toss the satchel in a dumpster (or perhaps I’d throw it in the canal). It would be suspicious if I started spending lots of money whilst unemployed so I’d keep to low-key stuff at first.

First purchases would be a new wardrobe, gaming system, decent television, etc. After a few months I’d buy a cheap car (paying cash - I wouldn’t put any of it in a bank). Other than that I’d use the money to coast for a few years.

I’d have to contact friends (maybe people on the Dope? ;)) and see if they have any ideas on how to come up with an explanation as to where the money is coming from, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to rent an apartment without risk. So yeah. I’d use it for comfort. If anything, it would let me live and work on my writing without having to worry about a job.

Edit: Contacting the police wouldn’t enter my mind for a moment. As far as I’m concerned it’s likely drug money. I’d be focused on getting the hell away from that dumpster as quickly as possible and keeping my mouth shut except around close friends.

11

I wouldn’t even have taken it home in the first place. As soon as I saw that it was full of cash, I would have called the police on the spot. If I didn’t have a phone with me, I’d leave the bag and go home and call. No way I want to be involved with a bag of mysterious money - far too many bad outcomes are possible.

12

Well, not being “financially secure” myself at this point, AND since it had been there so long, unclaimed and under such odd circumstances, I would probably keep it.

Hell YEAH, I would keep it! There isn’t anything to indicate this is “lost” money, as in someone accidentally lost their life savings or the money for their kid’s operation and I snatched it up soon after the error. If anything, it is ill gotten gains from some criminal activity or the legit owner is now dead. (even as a struggling returning college student and widow with 2 kids living on SS survivor benefits and student loans, I would NEVER find a wallet, say, on the train and keep the money…my late husband once left his wallet in a fast food place, went back 10 minutes later, and it was gone. A week’s pay was in that wallet…our rent money. As we said at the time, well, I hope the ASSHOLE who took it needs it more than WE do…unlikely.)

But also not being a complete ethical dullard, I would probably remove MOST of the money, leaving some, THEN report it to the police. Just in case there was some criminal involvement that should be followed up on.

WTH are they to know how much money was in the bag? Or that someone ELSE didn’t take it out before I found it as I was innocently doing my environmental duty by taking out my recyling? :confused:

I’d also have to check the news for any recent bank or other robberies (in case the bills were marked), be very careful about how I doled out my loot (since banks, car dealers, brokers, etc…are required to report cash payments/deposits over 10 grand), not alter my habits too much (which might be suspicious) and otherwise just keep it tucked safely away and used (for spending or investment) in small increments/as needed.

Gee, seems I have this already all figured out. :dubious:

Actually, I wrote a story about exactly this sort of scenario years ago, so yeah, I pretty much had to consider all these factors then. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. :smiley:

13

I’d turn a small portion of it in to the police, maybe $5000 or so, and see what happens. Find out if it’s counterfeit or if the serial numbers have been recorded.

Launder the rest.

14

And I would definitely NOT go back to bring the dying Mexican guy water.

15

One problem with laundering $100k is it’s an absolute bitch to do it yourself, through the casino route or whatever, but on the other hand it’s not enough money to have, er, professionals sort it out for you either.

16

Seems foolish. If I’m the cop you give the five grand to, I’m going to suspect right off the bat that you may have kept some for yourself. When you ask me in a week about the serial numbers or counterfeit status, I’ll be sure of it, and if there’s a legal reason you’re not allowed to, you’re getting a knock on the door post haste.

I think you have to either take the risk with all of it, or turn it all in.

First thing to do, I think, is look around to see if anyone’s in sight. If anyone’s in sight, call the police immediately. If not, take it home and call a lawyer.

17

Actually, the story I wrote dealt with exactly that…the way this bag of found money ended up destroying the struggling couple who found it. More a psychological situation, but also the practicalities and logistics involved. They had this HUGE (to them) stash of cash and were terrified, paranoid, and at loggerheads over what, if anything, to do with it (and HOW).

As I recall, the guy ended up returning the bag to the street where he found it. :wink:

You have a good point, but I answered honestly in my first reply…me, I would keep it. And be damn careful.

18

You don’t ask the cop about it, you wait to see if nobody claims it and they return it to you. They aren’t going to return counterfeit or stolen money. Once I know it’s in the clear, then I start laundering it.

19

Stop being smarter than me, damn it!

What do you with the $95,000 if they never return the $5,000 you turned in?

20

After the initial shock wore off, I’m sure my first thought would be to keep it. Then I’d think about the guy who lost it, and how happy he’s gonna be when it’s returned to him. I mean, you have to return lost property to it’s rightful owner, right?

But then, I’d think, what if it was me who lost all this money? I’d want it back right? And then I’d realize that if it was me who carelessly lost US$100k, the thing I’d want most would be for someone to teach me a lesson.

So I’d return the wallet or the satchel or whatever to the rightful owner, but I’d keep the money. For his own good.