I’d hand it over to the police because it was a pile of cash. I wouldn’t know what “meth lab stuff” was if it came and bit me in the ankle, but let’s say I did. Wouldn’t make a difference. It isn’t my money so it goes to a place where the owner can go and claim it, should he so desire.
Same here - turn the whole shebang over to the po-pos, and get a receipt. It is possible that, at the end of 90 days or something, I get some portion of the cash. If not, and the drug dealers come looking for their $100K, I have evidence I don’t have it. Of course, for the next year or so, if people I don’t know come knocking at my door I dial 911 without opening the door.
One thing I sure as hell don’t do is allow the police to give me a good citizen’s award for turning in the money - I want as few people to know I did it, no matter whether I collect a reward or not.
I might check with a lawyer if I was entitled to any part of the $100K, but I wouldn’t assume “finders keepers losers weepers” is a foundational principle in common law. So if I don’t get anything, I won’t be too disappointed.
Regards,
Shodan
1k, 5k, 10k, 100k.
Anything, really. I’d take it if it could be safely assumed that it was somehow used in a drug deal.
If I were to keep the money this would be my MO as well. Use the cash for small mundane stuff to avaoid attention. This would also free up more of my legitimate income in the long run. It’s much more plausible that I scrimped and saved up enough to pay for that new 60" LCD with my debit card than walking into Best Buy with a wad of bills.
Part of the problem though is that they change the currency so often these days. The old-style twenties really stand out even now, and there’s always talk of changing them further. If you’re planning to make the 100K last several years, there’s a good chance people will notice even a small purchase with an old bill.
In the end, I think I would turn it in, not so much out of a lofty dedication to right over wrong, but because I’d constantly be worried about being found out. It wouldn’t be worth the anxiety.
Back in the early 1970’s, my Great Uncle rented the room atop his barn to a long haired hippie type, back when Hippies were a Menace.
The guy was quiet and paid his rent on time and no problems.
One day my Great Uncle was walking his property and found a recently overturned pile of dirt. It wasn’t a critter. It was a covered hole. Up he dug it.
He found X amount of cash. ( I forget the amount, but it was probably under 50K. So that money, was ALOT of cash then. Maybe it was 20K.)
My G.Uncle notified the cops. It was assumed to be drug money. Men with badges and stuff walked the property and seached the Dirty Smelly Hippies place. The tenant was questioned, but either he got busted for dope or got off, I cannot remember. Not really important.
The money entered a Legal Hell’s Waiting room that took twenty plus years to resolve who got what. State/Federal/Anyone else. It was a mess.
In the end, by the time my Great Uncle got his ‘share’, it was considerably less and he was in his 80’s and nearing the end of his life. He said in the end it wasn’t worth the hassle.
I would destroy everything other than the cash. Then I would look through the bills and look for any marks or obvious serial number similarities. I would spend the cash over time for things like gas and groceries. I would gift cash to my kids.
Those who turn the cash in out of fear for the IRS; do you think the IRS is some sorta omniscient being?
It all goes to the cops - the money may provide clues to help nail the meth lab operators.
Yeah, but one of those guys was a really dumb redneck and another a guy who desperately wanted to get back his family’s farm.
Surely, us dopers are smarter than that. Aren’t we, aren’t we?
It would all go directly to the cops, and I walk away without a care. Not only isn’t the money worth it, the worry isn’t either.
Knowing myself, I’d obsess over this decision so long that, due to dementia, I’d forget all about it.
In all honesty, I’d probably use it to pay for medical bills that Medicare doesn’t cover . . . and help out a few friends as well.
Funny how this never ends well in movies. In addition to A Simple Plan, there’s the risk of having this guy show up at your door looking for it.
I know the smart thing would be pretend you never found it, but I’m afraid I would probably try to keep some of the cash. I probably wouldn’t take it all, just to make it look like it spilled or blew away or something. Then, I’d execute the DtC plan of using it for day to day expenses.
Good point.
Wondering…how much track, if any, is kept of those reloadable credit cards. like parents get for their kids?
So let’s say you decide to keep it.
And aren’t worried about “getting in trouble”.
What exactly would/could happen if you just walked into a brokerage firm with it (in cash) and requested to open an investment account? They want your business, would they balk at taking the money in that form? Are they obligated to alert anyone (cops, IRS)? I can’t imagine that they would.
If they asked, and you said “yup, I found it in a shoebox at the dump”, who’s to argue with you? There’s nothing illegal about finding money.
And finally, at what point, if any, would the IRS ask about it? Of course you’d pay taxes on your investment dividends like a good citizen. But would anyone really come around asking where you got the original 100k?
They’re legally required to report it to the feds under anti-money-laundering and anti-terrorism regulations. The legal risk, risk to their reputation, and plain old integrity would prevent them from just taking your money and not saying anything.
I’d keep the cash and destroy the rest. I’d spend about $30 a day on food and expenses so that would save me about 10k a year since I don’t spend that much. A couple of times a year I’d deposit a large amount (5K or so) for winning my fantasy football, my birthday, Christmas. All in all I think I could launder 30K a year or so. So three years and I’d have a nice clean pile of cash to spend.
Right now I’m not sure whether I use that money to go back to school ( JD or MBA) or to sell my current properties and buy a nice farm.
Keep it. You could come up with all sorts of legitimate reasons fro depositing money into your accounts, and provided you don’t mind paying some taxes on the the IRS is never going to even blink at you. For example, I’m an artist. I could sell a piece of art at a fair. The guy paid me cash. Etc etc… So I pay some taxes on it. Who cares? You really think the IRS is going to hound you down over a few grand a year in income that you PAID on…?
Well, they probably wouldn’t spend it - but it might be useful in investigating and (later) prosecuting the drug dealers. Such men are dangerous; I would feel terrible about depriving the cops of evidence they could use to help catch them.
Whatever. None of that describes me in the slightest.
OK. So you say “sure, go ahead and report it”. You repeat your story to the authorities - that you found it in a shoebox at the dump.
Then what happens?
This, pretty much. Meth lab gear is pretty pedestrian stuff. Tear it up and disperse it across a few dumpsters in good neighborhoods. No big deal.
To elaborate a bit, I’d just keep it around, taking a few hundred a month to pay for groceries, restaurants, gas–things where cash is pretty ubiquitous. I’d still use debit to pay for this sort of thing on occasion, just in case somebody audited my finances. This would allow me to use more of my own money to build equity and what not.