You know what I hate?!
I hate it when you walk into a bathroom after someone has taken a mega-dump and left, and the heavy stink is still lingering. So you urinate, and wash your hands. And as you head for the door some OTHER guy walks in and gets a whiff of the stench. And you just KNOW, from the look on his face, that he assumes YOU are the cause!
That’s what I hate!
Face it, you know it it was you!
Besides, I thought that only WOMEN worried about that kind of stuff. 
You can say “It wasn’t me,” but isn’t that what you’d say, either way?
oh yeah, I also hate REALLY LOW-POWERED BATHROOM VENTILATION FANS!!
I hate hotels that don’t have fans in their bathrooms.
I’m amazed at how many places that call themselves luxury hotels lack this important feature.
What’s really bad is when you open the door and the odor drifts out into the hall and there’s someone coming down the hall who sees you coming out of the men’s room and catches a whiff of that foul stench. Then word gets spread around all over work about the big stink you made in the men’s room. Pretty soon people avoid you. They conveniently “forget” to mention when the gang’s headin’ down to TGIFriday’s for a beer after work. You are a social pariah and it’s not your fault.
Or is it… we’ll never, never know for sure.
If you’re staying in a luxury hotel, you obviously feel you could have no possible use for that device.
Only luxury hotels, or the greybar kind, too?
Does the greybar kind have fans?
That’s why I shit in baggies in the privacy of my cube and keep them in the filing cabinet. Nobody looks at me funny.
Related rant:
One day, I will find the bitch that alternates stalls every day, but each time leaves the toilet full to the brim with piss, shit, and toilet paper. And when I find this bitch, I will make her clean the damn toilet out, by hand! I’ve been working at this company for three months, and I probably use that washroom at least 3 times a week (there’s another one closer to my lab, but it’s a one-holer, and often in use) and every time one of the 3 stalls is unusable because this fucking moron clogs it up. I’m amazed the cleaning staff haven’t gone on a fucking rampage yet.
How to you reach adulthood and not understand that adding more toilet paper to a clogged toilet won’t unclog it? I just don’t get it…
Ewwwwwww! That is gross. Unfortunately, morons like this abound. I have never worked in a place where I didn’t run into this situation.
Can this be about any random hates? Because, despite working in retail, and having to use a public restroom at work, I don’t actually have any toilet related rants.
But, you know what I hate?
X is the new X.
You know… 50 is the new 40, black is the new white, cold is the new hot.
I’m so fucking sick of this shit. I keep hearing this in commercials on the radio, seeing it on billboards, and even once in a conversation with a real human being (real as opposed to those robots called admen/adwomen ).
It’s so completely irrational but when I hear or see this moronic phrase, I get the urge to rip someone’s face off.
I’ve gotten the undeserved stink eye (heh) before. I just recite my favorite John Belushi SNL line given during a Superfriends party when Belushi, playing the Incredible Hulk, steps out of the bathroom after TCB. This makes the waiting Superman, Wonder Woman and Aquaman gag and start waiving their arms around.
“Aw c’mon it’s not supposed to smell like roses!” - A timeless classic. 
Well, I imagine that the file clerk is looking at you funny…
Ripping someone’s face off is the new smacking someone upside the head.
:: points at username::
<snerk>
Them high class people’s shit don’t stink.
This is one of the cool parts about having no sense of smell. This has either never happened to me, or it did but I didn’t know it. 
Please don’t be mad at mad.
I’ve actually said to people who’ve plowed into me in broad daylight on the sidewalk, when I’m walking straight ahead and they’re meandering all over the place, “What is [whatever color I’m wearing that day] the new invisible?”