I guess my punishment for keeping a 'blog (and stupidly not restricting to friends-only, which I’m thinking of doing after this) is that from time to time I get anon. note-leavers who just leave mean, hateful notes that fucking piss me off no end.
Like today…today’s entry was about my anxiety about not being able to stay home after the baby’s born, but having to go right back to work after maybe a week or two. I wrote about the shit I’m feeling about how worried I am about daycare, not being able to stay home all the time, stuff like that and then this fucktard comes in and tells me it’s my DUTY as a woman to stay home and be a mom. To ‘think about someone else for once in your life’.
Grr. I am thinking about someone else…the baby. I’m taking better care of myself than I had been and the reason I’m going back to work rather than staying home (other than we can’t afford it) is so that I can provide a better life for my child than my parents provided for me.
I hate it when people leave anon. notes…it bugs me because it means you are a coward who can’t even leave their own name (or at the very least, your usual 'net handle) on a note to someone you don’t even know.
If you can’t take anonymous criticism, you shouldn’t post anonymous blogs. Seriously. That’s why I don’t have a blog or a live journal - I wouldn’t be able to handle strangers critiqing my every move that I post. If you have easily pressed buttons that really set you off, don’t let people have the chance to press them.
Well I won’t be getting anymore anonymous criticism, Munch. I set it to ‘LJ users only’, that way if somebody decides to dogpile me, at least I can go to their blogs and dogpile back or something.
MetalMaven
Even if they left a name, so what? Likely it wouldn’t have someone you know, right? How does “Frank Smith” help you more than “anonymous”, if you don’t know Frank Smith?
I just read the comments in your journal, and I’m not seeing the problem. They didn’t say that it’s your duty as a woman to stay home. What they said was it is entirely possible that you would spend more on daycare than you bring in, and thus it would be better for you to not go back to work but rather stay home and be a full-time mother.
No, they didn’t sign their name to it, but that’s no reason to discount entirely what they said. You work in fast food, correct? It’s reasonable to assume on that basis that your pay is not a large amount. They also said that it might be a good idea to look into sources of assistance. Why do you find that so insulting? Those programs exist to help people with children who might not have all the ideal financial resources, which I think describes your situation.
This person actually had some good suggestions, which as per usual you are rejecting, and they quite understandably got frustrated.
Your WWW link makes me want to climb a water-tower with a high-powered rifle.
Midi music on a web-page is a crime against humanity.
I despise you in the convenient and remote way that only a total stranger on the intraweb whose life you have impacted in a practically infinitesimal way can.
I do not know what a blog is. I am ignorant of the nature of a live journal. My ignorance is and shall remain blissful. However, it is good form to link to that which you discuss. If you don’t want people to see what you are ranting about you should probably hold the rant along with the metaphorical pickles.
This is not meant to be nasty, its just that IDBB did the same thing in many of her posts and I overworked the google hamsters trying to figure out what the hell she was talking about.
Every now and then, listen to some of the good advise given you and stop looking for the hate and anger that you seem to feel towards so many others. It’s tiresome.
You put it in a public forum…you deal with criticism. You don’t want public comments - or anonymous comments - you make the fucking thing friends-only or you disable anonymous comments.
Ever notice how the people who publicly claim to have the thickest skins are the first ones to come whining to the Pit when someone says something they don’t want to hear?
You’re put-upon and misunderstood and trying your hardest and full of pride and a punk and a redneck and a goth and you’re - gawrd forbid - bringing another one of YOU into the world. We get it. Now it’s time to shut UP about how much of the WORLD and the SDMB and the LJ COMMUNITY and oh christ EVERYONE is against you and fucking DO something about it.
I just read the posts in question - the “think about someone else” bit was in a followup post, after you totally blew off that anonymous poster’s list of things you really need to think about - the cost of child care vs. your salary, the possibility of government help, the physical stress that childbirth will put on your body, and so forth. After being completely dismissive of some very important questions with “I can’t do that” responses and saying you won’t go on “welfare” because of pride regardless of what else you have to do and even when you worried about what this might do to your relationship and your baby… well. I’m not surprised that the anonymous person tried to get tough. If it makes you think more clearly about what you’re facing, maybe that’s not such a bad thing. And no, I didn’t post it.
Really? You wouldn’t kid a guy would you. I was afraid she was gone for good. I actually missed the old girl. Along comes Maven and I figure she may end up being a pale replacement for the late lamented IDBB, but she will have to do.
Please don’t take my enthusiasm for an endorsement of the poster known under several aliases, but one must admit she is a one of a kind.
