Hrrm most of what I’m saying I probably shouldn’t type. But what the flying fuck eh?
My good friend works in the lab down the hall. A lab where they hired a post doc. This post doc was fired from her position in a lab on the other side of the hall. Same foundation, same department, just a different PI.
Sure there was a reason, there always is. My friend’s boss is a big believer in second chances. More power to him.
But this woman is a psychotic bitch.
She read me the riot act at lunch. A lunch she invited herself along to.
She read me the riot act over something so utter pathetic it served no purpose other than to make both of us wonder how she got her PhD.
She’s from canada. And I’m sure the schools up there are just as good as the one’s down here, but if she is in any way a representation of indivudals who get their terminal degree from a Canadian University then you Canadians have a lot of work to do in your public schools.
It started off a while ago when she was bragging about how she fired her thesis committee after they gave her a comment she didn’t like on her thesis. Now I don’t know of a single school that would put up with a graduate student who did that. Unless they managed to prove that the entire committee was biased against them for personal reasons, and even then I doubt it.
I say this as a background to give you the sort of idea of what she’s like.
As you can guess she doesn’t take criticism, or take directions or basically listen to anythign that doesn’t fit into her little view of the world. Which makes for a great personality I’ll tell you that much.
What’s even funnier is in science EVERYTHING is based on reputation. If you keep pissing off PIs especially important influencial PIs then you might as well quit not and burn your PhD cause you will NEVER get your own lab.
So basically for the last few weeks I’ve been watching her slowly destroy her own career. She’s already been fired from one post doc, and will soon be fired from her second. I don’t think anyone will hire her.
Now to the riot act.
There is a protocol manual writtten by the CDC about the safety levels for different viruses. It tells you what you should work with and where and what gear you need to safely work at.
Basically, it tells you what you must absolutly do to ensure your safety and I’m assuming keep your NIH funding. Nowhere does it say you must do this and only this. If you feel safer wearing gloves working with .5N HCl then feel free. But not wearing gloves won’t kill you.
She takes it as gospel. THOU SHAL NOT EXCEEDE THE SAFETY REQUIREMENTS!
Her big thing are masks.
We work with virus, the lab she is in is basically an SIV lab, with some work in other visuses. She refuses to wear a mask while working in the 2+. Because, and you need to REALLY work hard with her reasoning here, masks increase your risk of contracting the virus you’re working with.
Take a hypothetical situation. You’re working on virus and you accidently cause an aerosol (you spray virus into the air) and by some godawful chance, it escapes the laminar flow hood (a fume hood that creates a pocket of workspace isolated from the rest of the room’s air). And say these droplets manage to land on your mask.
If you were wearing a mask you’d be at an even greater risk. Cause, you see you wouldn’t notice the droplets land on your mask, and they’d dry. When they dry you’d then breathe in viral particles and then get sick.
So she advocates not wearing a mask so you won’t breathe in viral particles.
Now, just for shits and giggles lets replay that same situation but without the mask.
You just splashed virus all over your mouth. What if you had your mouth open!? Uhoh! You just had virus fly into your mouth. Thank fucking god I wasn’t wearing a mask and risked breathing the virus!
Her defense of that:
See, you wouldn’t notice the virus landing on your mask, and then it’d dry and you’d breath it in. See, you don’t notice little things like that.
My response: So you just injested virus? And what’s this about not noticing little things. YOU FUCKING HAD BSL-4 access. You stupid excuse for a used tampon disposal, working in the BSL-4 is all about noticing the little things. In the fucking 4 you work with agents where a small tear in your suit = DEATH.
If you can’t be fucking bothered to notice a liquid splashing up in your face then you should go back to doing something you capable of. Namely giving handjobs for crack!
So I, not wanting to prolong this, shrug and say “I prefer to follow the safety guide lines that I follow, better to use more safety than less.”
And she started reading my the goddamn riot act.
“See that’s when you start being a danger, when you start disregarding the safety guidelines and start making them up on your own.”
Some religions say masturbation is a waste of sperm and a crime unto god. I’m begining to belive that in some special cases pregnancy is also a waste of sperm.
Yes, I am a bad bad boy. I totally ignore all of the wonder safety procautions, I say fuck that book! I’m gonna live my life dangerously. Screw this I only need to wear double gloves and a gown over my street clothes.
I’m gonna be a REBEL. I’m going to wear a MASK! Oh oh oh I’m going to wear a specially treated gown with a plastic coating so things I splash DON’T SOAK THROUGH THE GOWN AND INTO MY CLOTHES!
You’re fucking right, I’m a bad human being who is going to be the down fall of our civilization.
Jesus fucking christ. You have a PhD but don’t understand the purpose of a safety manual.
Its to tell everyone the basics of what they need to do to ensure their safety.
It’s not like I’m being a freak here. I’m working with a very pathogenic strain of HIV, and various compounds that kill 80 % of the cells I’m working with in LESS THAN A FUCKING HOUR.
She starts talking to me about all of her experience in vet labs. (Let us not mention she’s had her phd for 2 years… so she has all of what 1 year of experience working with animals.)
You don’t see vets working with animals in full protective gear do you?
NO FUCKING SHIT YOU STUPID WOMAN! YOU"RE NOT GONNA GET BSE FROM TAKING A COW’S TEMPURATURE RECTALLY!
But if that cow was shit that was packed full of HIV I wouldn’t go in there without a space suit!
How can you have a PhD and still not realize that there is a fudamental difference between working with sick animals, sick animals that humans have been exposed to for MORE THAN 10,000 MOTHER FUCKING YEARS and working with a virus that is less than 50 years old (in the general population). ITS CALLED EVOLUTION YOU PIECE OF RECTAL DISCHARGE.
If humans could die from exposure to cow shit, we would have died until we evolved ways to defend ourselves. Or we would have KILLED ALL THE FUCKING COWS!
The scary thing was that this piece of uselessness was given access to the BSL4.
I’m worthing with a DEADLY PATHOGEN. One of the most dangerous. Sure hiv takes a long freaking ass time to kill you. BUT IT HAS A MOTHERFUCKING 100% MORTALITY RATE. THAT’S HIGHER THAN EBOLA! If I contracted Ebola I can HOPE TO LIVE.
But that’s a NATURAL STRAIN. God FUCKING KNOWS HOW A LAB STRAIN WOULD REACT IN A HUMAN BODY!
Let us not forget that while HIV can’t enter through intact skin, it can however enter through mucous membranes and open wounds. So, this is just me speaking since obviously you are god and know everything, maybe COVERING EVERY PART OF MY BODY WHERE THE VIRUS CAN EASILLY ENTER IS A GOOD GODDAMN THING!
THen she noticed that I was trying not to laugh at her.
So she attacked my believe in extra safety this way:
It costs money to run a BSL-3 lab.
Yup I know this. But here’s the thing you bitch. We ALREADY HAVE THE BSL-3. And do you know the differences between having someone in the BSL-3 and just having it sit there?!
WE TURN ON THE GODDAMN LIGHTS. YEAH SO USING THE BSL-3 COSTS SO GODDAMN MUCH! Gee compared to running the pressure gradient, and filtering the exhaust air and keeping the tempurature stable 24/7 WHICH HAS TO BE DONE ANYWAY FOR THE WHOLE BSL-3 AREA, me sitting in there with the lights on REALLY WILL BREAK THE FUCKING BANK!
Keep in mind, this is from the woman who TURNS OFF THE AIR FLOW IN THE TISSUE CULTURE HOODS WHEN SHE IS DONE! Why not just fuck jesus up the ass with a cross! The whole purpose of creating a sterile laminar flow hood is to KEEP THE AIR INSIDE STERILE! And when you turn off the blowers that isolate the space inside the hood, YOU JUST DESTROYED THE STERILITY! So to be sure you won’t contaminate your tissue culture you’ve gotta RE-STERLIZE THE GODDAMN HOOD. But guess what, YOU DON’T.
You just come in on monday and turn the blowers back on. And you sit here lecturing me about sterility and safety?
This from the woman who refuses to use gloves with working with tissue culture?
“They give you a false sense of sterility!”
WHAT THE CRIST RAPING FUCK?
Apparently,she knows people who think its ok to touch things EVEN with gloves on.
Well in the PhD program that produced her well of intellect and ability, that’s not suprising.
I wear gloves so the viruses, bacteria and fungus living on my hands, which I may not kill 100% of, won’t CONTAMINATE THE HOOD! Cause once the hood gets contaminated, GEE WIZ! I could contaminate EVERYTHING FUCKING ELSE. Also, I could spend several min each time I go in or out of the hood washing my hands. Or I could sterilize my gloves with ethanol. Ya know kill off everything with a membrane? If you don’t understand enough to know that if you TOUCH ANYTHING you contaminate it. GET THE FUCK OUT OF BIOLOGY.
Yeah I’m sure in 6 years you didn’t contaminate anything by not wearing gloves. Yeah sure… In 6 years you failed to contaminate anything.
So I had to listen to this during lunch. She never once picked up on my amusement of listening to her. Unlike her, I know I might not be right on everything. But if I’m not right, I’d rather err on the side of caution by doing more than I need to do to ensure my safety and the safety of those around me.
What makes this whole situation funny from my point of view:
Her career is just about over in Virology. She got fired from one post doc. You can gloss that over, depending on how you left. She got her access to the BSL 3 and 4 revoked. That’s harder to ignore. People will want to know why. Sure, it COULD just be a personality conflict and a petty boss. But how she’s still pissed off, and bitching to everyone about her new boss is making her WEAR A MASK IN “DIRECT VIOLATION OF THE CDC GUIDELINES” won’t cut it anywhere. But here’s the funny thing. Her current boss is about ready to fire her ass. You can explain getting fired from one post doc, but two? Especially the when the second one will fire you for many reasons, but if its personal, he doesn’t count that against you. If you get fired because you are unsafe to work in a lab, or can’t follow directions; he lets everyone know.
What makes it even funnier. She keeps bragging about how she has this job offer from the middle of nowhere on the east coast, but it’s working with bacteria so she won’t take it.
And there are 4 of us who keep making hints that she should look into it. Because we all know her days are numbered, and after she gets fired her currenty boss will let it be known its due to her poor abilities as a PhD and how she can’t follow his safety guidelines for his employees.