Football? What’s a football?
Well it’s a leg…you know, like a statue.
A statue?
Yeah a statue…
Yeah! A statue.
Ralphie!
My old man could change fuses quicker than a jackrabbit on a date-he bought 'em by the gross. Quick wiff of ozone and the lamp blazed forth in…(damn, what’s the rest? Internets fail me…)
And one I stole from Wikiquote-
My old man’s spare tires were only actually tires in the academic sense. They were round and had once been made of rubber.
Oh boy, that’s mine!
“I’m not color blind” I’m not color blind either"
Skunked again!
“Where’s Flick? Has anyone seen Flick?”
Flick? Flick who?
“This isn’t one of those trees where all the needles fall off, is it?”
“Nah, that’s them balsams.”
[sub]“Ralphie, shh, shh it’s your mother, your mother! Ralphie, it’s your mother, shhhhh…”[/sub]
Counter-signed by Pierre Andre!
I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master.
He looks like a deranged Easter Bunny.
He does not!
He does too. He looks like a pink nightmare!
It’s… A… CLINKER!
My old man could change a fuse faster than a jackrabbit on a date. He bought them by the gross.
Sigh.
puts head down on desk
Victor! It’s Victor! Everybody knows that!
… It’s staring at us!
I like The Wizard of Oz…I like the Tin Man…
My kid brother looked like a tick about to pop!
Uncle uncle uncle UNCLE! UUUUUUNCLE!!!
::sound of tire popping:: “Ah, blob!”
<high voice>
Thanks a lot!
</high voice>
We use this one almost every day.