““Either this wallpaper goes or I do.” — Oscar Wilde. Okay. A couple of things here. First of all, what he actually said was, “This wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. Either it goes or I do.” Which is pretty damn funny… Unfortunately, he said this weeks before he died. Oscar Wilde’s actual last words, as far as we can tell, were part of a mumbled Catholic prayer. Oh well.”
I question if General McAuliffe actually said “nuts”. That he responded with one word I have no doubt but having a couple kinfolk in the battle with him I have a feeling it was a different word; probably either shit or fuck.
As far as those less open to speculation I would second Bunker Hill.
New Jersey Muslims dancing in the streets, on 9/11.
And the record-breaking crowd at Trump’s inauguration.
The beginning and end of Punic Carthage have good tales behind them. A little too good.
For the founding, Queen Dido was offered as much land as she could cover with an ox hide. So cut the hide into strips and surrounded a hill with the resulting string.
At the end, after being defeated, it’s said that the Romans salted the earth so nothing could grow there. Something that just wouldn’t be practical let alone affordable.
I thought Wilde’s last words were, “I am dying as I lived; beyond my means.” He was being offered some last champagne at the time.
Anyway. Um. I gotta go with the Bowling Green Massacre too.
I think the Great Martian Invasion of 1938 deserves mention, despite the fact that no one believes it.
My wife, Pepper Mill, literally grew up in the tiny region of Grover’s Mill, NJ (now part of West Windsor Township) where the Martian Cylinder was supposed to have fallen. Her sister was instrumental in having a monument erected there – where, aside from some alleged panic, nothing took place.
I know there are some folks who now claim that no one was panicked at the time, but there’s plenty of contemporary news coverage – it’s not ALL hype. And there was a study that took place not long afterwards.
Galileo muttering “it still moves” after officially recanting the Copernican theory before the Inquisition. That would have been totally badass, and totally stupid.
“Sighted submarine, sunk same” (Sighted sub, sank same - Wikipedia)
A friend’s dad immediately ran away from home with his prize possessions in a rucksack, got his best friend, and they took the bus downtown to the army recruiting station. “We’re enlisting to fight the Martians, sir!”
If it isn’t true it should’a been (the grandson sure was nerdy enough)…
the first clock in Navarre is in Olite; it was built by Carlos III. Well, by a French clockmaker paid by the king, of course. But according to legend, one of the king’s conditions for the contract was that he’d be allowed to poke around the workshop and even do a bit of work on the clock, and that while he was “apprenticing” around the workshop he’d be “Carlos” and not “your majesty”. It appeals both to my own nerdiness and to the local culture where “the customer is not always right and never awed by experts; the customer wants to know what the heck the experts are doing and wants to be told when the stuff he’s doing or asking for is just fucking stupid.”
Lady Godiva’s ride probably did not happen, but I wish it had. I think it’s a really great story of caring and compassion.
Of course not, he was too busy chucking silver dollars across the river.
Margaret Thatcher invented Mr Whippy/Soft Serve ice cream.
The nice thing about this myth is that it is repeated by both pro- and anti- camps. According to Pro, it shows that she was (as well as her other fine qualities) an outstanding scientist; for the Anti camp: “by “inventing” soft serve ice cream, Thatcher “added air, lowered quality and raised profits”, used as a metaphor for her policies later as prime minister.”
It’s a shame I’m only allowed one. Otherwise I would have suggested the Angels of Mons as well. Of course God was on Our Side. It’s a great story.
j
“Et tu, Brute?” Invented by Shakespeare (who in turn was a guy from Avon who wrote plays, and not a nom de plume for deVere or some other “real” author of the plays)
I also came in to mention the Bowling Green Massacre.
Which is a mile wide near Mount Vernon… His teeth weren’t wooden either. There is a whole catalog worth of “things not true about Washington.”
My current favorite is George Washington’s teeth being made of wood. My dad recently brought this up, kinda out of nowhere, and I did the whole “ACTUALLY…” thing on him and he got really mad. Like, it really mattered to him that his 1957 history book be correct and that he hadn’t been “lied to” his whole life. I didn’t even mention that many of the teeth in the dentures were from slaves. That woulda just put me in the “LIBERAL LIAR!” doghouse for the day.
It’s ok to learn the whole truth, man. It should be a sense of relief, not anger.
I’m surprised that I’m the first to mention the resurrection of Christ.
The Exodus and the Egyptian Captivity of the Jews. There is no archaeological or historical evidence to indicate that the Jews were ever captive in Egypt or spent time wandering in the Sinai.
Most due to Parson Weems although its debated if he made them all up or if some were folk tales of the day.