That’s the best part! 
Nothing in Vegas is worth a half-a-shit. Fuck that place!
Discloser: I used to live there, and after moving, would accompany my Mom down a couple times a year. Hate it. Hate it. Hate it.
Las Vegas is like an oil rig. Sure it churns out money, but everyone choosing to live there is in it for the pay check alone and despises the atmosphere.
You know, Al Jones had four brothers. They were known as “los sin cojones” (cinco Jones).
Thank you for this. I love your follow up. It was approx. 37 years ago I first heard the Al Jones Diner joke, I remember because I remember the guy who told me just before going to San Diego to represent his company at a convention. I needed the translator to recall what ‘sin’ means in Spanish, making your addition quite hilarious. My ‘S spaniel’ has always been weak and it’s not a case where my only slightly better Portuguese skills help. Your second part has elevated the joke beyond mildly humorous at best to a new level. One more addition would fulfill the rule of 3s and produce true Comedy Gold.
Glad you liked it. 
That’s all I got with Jones.
Somebody was telling me to wash a sweater with Bo-o-lee-tay. With what? Bo-o-lee-tay. And on we went, until I realized she was talking about Woolite.
My favorite Mariachi tune - I really thought it was “One Ton Tomato”.
I sing it One ton of mierda.
For me, the big difference between chili size and a chili burger is that the latter has a dab of chili, a small enough amount that you can still pick it up and eat it. A size, OTOH has enough that it’s definitely knife-and-fork time, like the hot [meat] sandwiches discussed.
I mean, that’s why the crown is often divided in two, as in the picture in my post above.
Man, I have got to try one of those “chili sizes” the next time I am in the United States. Thanks for the tips, all!
don’t forget the mashed potatoes!
A few years ago when I was in San Francisco, there was a Diner right on the edge of the Tenderloin that did some amazing food.
Biscuits and Gravy, first time I ever tried it, Hash Browns which were chopped potatoes on the hotplate. Stuff I’d never eaten before or since.
Those are what we call at home, “home fries.” Oil in the pan, drop your diced potatoes in, stir-fry with maybe onions and parsley, and serve. Delicious!
One of the problems I have with diners is that damn near everything for breakfast involves eggs. “Two eggs any style, and ______.” I cannot eat eggs. Not unless you want a … yeah, well, let’s leave that unsaid. But, even if it’s not on the breakfast menu, diners can usually put together a BLT (hell, it’s just toast, bacon, lettuce, and sliced tomato) for me. Oh, and don’t forget the mayo.
Put home fries on the side, and I’m a happy guy!
My wife used to tell people there’s a clause in our marriage contract requiring me to make hash browns (grated fried potatoes) every Saturday. After a few years she thought home fries (diced fried potatoes) would be nice. She wants to lose some weight, so nowadays she rarely eats a proper breakfast.
FWIW, Crazy Otto’s had the best hash browns… and plenty of them! I could finally make good hash browns after seeing them make theirs. (The trick: Rinse the excess starch out.)
Thinking about this thread, I suggested we visit a diner for breakfast this morning. My gf vetoed the suggestion, because the breakfasts I make are better than you get at a diner (according to her).
Nice compliment, but a diner breakfast would mean I wouldn’t have to work. I made waffles from scratch, adding blueberries from our yard.
Your culinary prowess notwithstanding, It’s no great feat to outclass a diner. Assembly line food at scale is going to have trouble. The beauty of it is thereis no effort required, no dishes to wash, no cleanup. A lot of places can’t even get toast right.
Yeah, breakfast food is not technically difficult to prepare – it’s getting everything done and hot at the same time.
Maybe if you order one in New Hampshire. But every chili burger I’ve ever had and I’ve had a lot was called a chili burger and it was an open face burger smoothed with chili.
Yes. A “Chili Burger “ means smothered in Chili. Otherwise, what’s the point?
See previous posts. A chili burger is closed, and a chili size is open-faced.