My first post was lost in our infamous Winter of '01/'02. My first post actually found in the archives is me commenting on howall of my previous posts are gone.
Best I can determine mine was 06-18-2003, 07:20 PM in the thread What’s your favorite instrumental?
It’s easy to find your early stuff if you use the “ascending order” option.
Here’s mine, as far as I can tell. Unsurprisingly, it’s about girls.
While not nearly so prolific, nor grizzled as most of you in this thread, I will say that I lurked about for over a year before being compelled to contribute, regarding a cooking show. 
Strangely enough, it was on my birthday, too.
As far as I can tell, my first post was in support of another teacher who was having some problems.
It was later that I turned into a total asshole.
My first post was not interesting - just a nitpick about a staff mailbag answer.
My first post concerned the endless argument about toilet paper. Over or Under?!?!?
Have no idea. It was 13 years ago.
Fairly sure it was the “What if LOTR had been written by someone else?” epic, a link to which was what got me to this site in the first place.
I can’t find mine. Which just shows to go how memorable that post was(n’t).
Jan 02, 2007
My first contribution to the Dope:
[QUOTE=a younger, more innocent olivesmarch4th]
My husband and I like the band Cake. One day he comes up to me and says, “YOU’VE got the right eye locations!” Upon further investigation I learned that he sincerely believed “Short Skirt, Long Jacket” contains the line “I want a girl with the right eye locations.” (The proper line is, “I want a girl with the right allocations.”)
My best friend is even worse. You know the song “Breakfast at Tiffany’s?”
And I said, “What about ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’?”
She said, “I think I remember the film line…
As I recall I think we both kind of liked it.”
Her completely baffling interpretation was as follows:
And I said, “What about ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’?”
She said, “I think I remember the bill line.
As I recall we both got two counts on hygiene.”
Guh?
[/QUOTE]
I’m kinda bummed. Although at least I can go home now and make fun of my husband again.
Earlier thread asking folks what their first post was
My earliest was in the Welcome thread when this board was first starting up.
Due to a change in board software (long story, more complicated than just “we changed from uBB to vBulletin” but probably geekier than y’all would care to follow), the usernames are all missing on those old posts. Mine can be recognized by the signature line “Designated Optional Signature at Bottom of Post”.
It kinda looks like Fat Man in the Bath Tub created one of the first SDMB zombie threads.
Deborak asked a work question about working from home and I commented about a mistake in time units. (12/02)
My join date is that Spring, and Deborak hasn’t posted since 2003.
An answer to that old question:
and also giraffes:
http://www.arkive.org/giraffe/giraffa-camelopardalis/video-ti06.html