When I got in my car accident, the last words I spoke before being hit by the truck and spun around like a top were “Oh, SHIT!” I hope I can do better than that when the time comes.
“For hate’s sake I spit my last breath at thee!”
Or, better still:
“Don’t eat the [cough] . . . Don’t eat the [cough] [cough] [flatlines]!”
Peace be with you.
I’ve read that cockpit voice recorders capture those particular last words more than any others.
“Smoke me a kipper, I’ll be back for breakfast.”
See, I totally plan on quoting Shakespeare, or some other poet or author. At the moment I think I would go with Shelly’s
My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!me: “Who?-- [hacking cough]”
them: “yes, grandpa?”
me: “Whooo?-- [hacking cough]”
them: “yes, grandpa, we’re with you now… it’s okay… [sobs]”
“Whoooo… put the bomp in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp?
Who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong?
Who put the bop in the bop shoo bop shoo bop?
Who put the dip in the dip da dip da dip?
Who… [hacking cough] Who was that man?!”
…flatline…
“I can see it all clearly now… Cecil… is… GOD!!!”
::smack myself in the head:: “I coulda had a V8!”
“Top o’ the world, Ma!”
“At last I can finally ask Amelia Earhart, Judge Crater and Jimmy Hoffa what really happened…”
Gimme a pen and paper. I just figured out the Grand Unification Theorum.
Alas, there is insufficient space in my bedpan to express it.
“I’m going to kick Satan’s ASS!”
Oooh, good one. Can I borrow it?
The thing is, it’ll crack my wife up.
“What’s next?”
See you tomorrow!
Nobody touch my beer. I’ll be back.
Bye, Opal!
Actually, wouldn’t it be embarrasing to have a great last quote, then…waiting…silence…a bunch of people look at each other …“Is he…” “No, no, not yet…” More waiting. Someone coughs. Shuffling of feet. “Now?” “No, still alive…”
Me:“Jeez, I’m sorry guys, I thought that was it. Umm…can we just pretend what you just heard was the last thing…and then when I do…you know…yeah. Could someone hand me my juice box?”
I always wanted to say, “The gold … is in the …”
And then die.
Just to give my kids something to do for a while.
"I see it now . … beyond death . . . he comes . . .
Tell ! Tell EVERYONE ! LOVECRAFT WASN"T WRITING FICTION !
YOG-SOTHOTH COMES - URRRRGH ! !"
< dies >
In a similair vein…
“Goodbye, cruel world! Goodbye, cruel lamp! Goodbye, cruel velvet curtains with the gold cords and cute little pompons on the end, cruel though they be…”