My last words will be “It was a stone groove my man!”. Thats said by the “YEAH” guy in trading places.
“Y’know, I am just dying to get this over with.”
Colin
I always sort of liked the Redneck’s last words:
“Hey y’all, watch THIS!”
According to James Gleick in his book ‘Genius: The life and science of Richard Feynman’ Richard’s last words (as he was dying of cancer) were “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring”.
Not eager to find out myself…
“Here I go… into the void!”
Just the sort of thing I might not have the prescence of mind to say at the moment, but funny nonetheless.
Not unless they watched the movie, or recalled a certain Peanuts strip about Citizen Kane where Lucy tells Linus (before the end of the movie, presumably) that “Rosebud” was his sleigh! 
I was waiting for this opening! Thanks, superbee, you’re the best! I have a story in one of my Bathroom Readers (#8, p… 226) about Major John Sedgwick’s death (it’s part of a section on ironic deaths):
Of course, I reaize you may know the story already, but I’m just posting it up anyways.
[sub]sorry for the hijack… life can continue[/sub]
Spiteful: “See you in Hell…”
Vindictive: “Hey, (fill in name here), I pissed in your shampoo bottle everytime I was at your house.”
Culture reference: “And now for something completely different…”
Odd: “They say if you stare into the abyss long enough, it stares back into you. I tried to make the abyss blink my entire life, but now I blink…”
but most likely: “Urrggh…”
Cackling maniacally as I disappear into thin air, leaving only my black cloak behind al à Obi-Wan Kenobi - but with cackling.
“Not yet, damn it! Not yet!”
Or
“Fuck it, it was a lousy life anyway.”
[Arnold Rimmer]Gespacho soup![/Arnold Rimmer]
“I AM IMMORTAL!”
[Arnold]I’ll be back.[/Arnold]
Or more poetically:
Oh! ye’ll take the high road and
I’ll take the low road,
And I’ll be in Scotland afore ye;
But me and my true love
Will never meet again
On the bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomond.
“I always wanted my last word to be the word ‘banana.’”
That’s what I mean. I’ve referenced Citizen Kane before and generally nobody either has seen the movie, or makes the connection. Either way, most people don’t get it, and I’m left trying to explain the joke.
See, toldja it was edible!
A spear…
Now, then, where did I put that snake venom antidote…
…and I’m gonna grab 'im by 'is tail, and shove my Thumb up 'is BUM!
SDMB Poster : “WTF?”
Old SDMB Poster : “No, Luke, I am Cecil!”
Mine’ll probably be something like,
“Don’t shoot! I’m with the good guys!”
or
“Sure, I’d love a last cigarette before your firing squad finishes me off, but I’d rather you light it and shove it up your stinkin’ ass, you poor excuse for a goat-felching fascist!”
or
So THIS is the sound of one hand clapping…
“mayonaisse”
Somebody will get this obscure cultural reference.
Gotcha ya!
“If John Edwards tells you I’m sending a message from beyond the grave, he’s lying. Unless the message is, ‘John Edwards can kiss my decomposing ass!’”
“Expressing a human need, I always wanted to write a book that ended with the word Mayonnaise.”
–Trout Fishing in America by Richard Brautigan.
(The actual last line of the book being “P.S. Sorry I forgot to give you the mayonnaise.”)
Well, I’d like to go out with some dignity, and a bit of glory. Maybe something like…
“Initiating Retro-Fire in 3…2…1…MARK!”
“Men of harlech, cease your dreaming…”
Or, from “The Mummy”: “Hold on laddies, I’m coming!”
…Which means, of course, my last words are going to be something like:
“Just cut the leads from the battery to the timer. Yeah, that’s righ-”
“(sound of clip being ejected from pistol) Got 'im! NOTHING could survive tha-”
Or the simple, yet classic: “Urk-Pills!-Nrgh. Agggggghhh…”
Ranchoth
“Ip.” (bonus points and an official “I am a sad person” lapel pin for the first person to identify the reference)
Actually, I’d probably like to go out with:
“Well, that was interesting…”