Your six questions for Osama bin-Laden: SUBMIT HERE!

In My Humble Opinion
1

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A5401-2001Oct16.html

What would you like answered?

2

Who the hell pissed in your Cheerios?

3
  1. By what method would you like to die?
  2. When you die, would you like it to be fast or slow?
  3. Would you like to die in Afganishtan or America? (Hi Opal!)
  4. How would you like the moments leading up to your death to be spent: Running away from bombs, or running away from bullets?
  5. After you die, how would you like your corpse to be disposed of: Buried with pigs, or buried with the poop from American toilets?
  6. When you die would you… Oh fuck it. Who gives a rat’s ass. You’re going to die, and it hope it is the most disrespectful, dirtiest death you can imagine.

I feel better now. You can go about your business.

4
  1. Do you hear a whistling noise?
5

[Turtle Bay Residents Association]

Osama bin Laden, murderer, may you rot in hell for killing thousands of innocent civilians! May your skin crack and split open and peel off your putrid body!

And, jeez, if you were so keen on destroying tall buildings, why couldn’t you have done that damn Trump tower instead?

[/Turtle Bay Residents Association]

6

1)What will be your exact latitude and longitude tonight at midnight?
2)Regular or extra-crispy?

:smiley:

7

Reporter: Who are you and why are you here?

Kent Brockman: For Crying out loud do your research!!!

8

What will be the first thing you say to Allah upon learning that a bullet is blazing through your skull?

9

What’s your SDMB screen name?

10

  1. So how many times were you dropped on your head as a baby, anyway?

  2. When you sold your soul to the devil, what did you get in return?

  3. What do you have against Opal?

  4. Would you like to be shot at sunrise or sunset?

  5. Which ring of Hell would you like to be imprisoned in?

  6. What does having shit for brains feel like?

11

1 Is it safe?

2 Is it safe?

3 Is it safe?

4 Is it safe?

5 Is it safe?

6 Is it safe?

12

  1. Is it true all this is just a ploy to ensure that Art Malik will depict you in the film?

  2. You seem to have adopted the same defensive strategy as that of the naked mole rat. How do you feel the naked mole rats’ political agenda is progressing?

  3. How many thrown rocks does it take to get to the center of an M1A2?

  4. When you look into the vacant, staring eyes of your followers, do you see the future of your cause?

  5. What would one of your mothers say?

  6. You’ve been given a choice for your last meal. Will it be the bacon and egg, or sausage McMuffin?

13

(seen on t-shirt): Now that you’ve opened that ten-gallon jar, how would you like your whoop-ass served?

14
  1. Have you driven a Ford lately?
  2. Would you like to supersize your order?
  3. What the Hell were you thinking?
  4. How does your makeup man get your mouth to so much like a pussy?
  5. Assuming you will deny being the stupidest fucker on the planet, who could possibly be more stupid?
  6. Got milk?

Alternate question: Do you enjoy living the rest of your short life like an animal?

15

[list=1]
[li]What’s your exact location?[/li][li]Would you like a blindfold or a cigarette?[/li][li]Anything in particular you’d like done with your ashes?[/li][li]What’s your exact location again?[/li][li]Okay, do you see a dot of red light centered on your torso? What about now?[/li][/list=1]

16

  1. What do ya 'spose Atta and the boyz woulda said if they knew you’d be shorting airline stocks to make a bundle off of their “sacrifices”?

  2. Do you feel like you got cheated out of a bigger body count by those heroes over Pennsylvania? Didn’t they just really piss you off?

  3. When you were beating the shit out of the Soviets in your salad days, were you planning on turning on the U.S. WHILE you were accepting our help, or did that boring ole “peace” thang just get so fuckin’ dull that you just stirred the up shit for old times’ sake?

  4. Did you think we were going to give up to the likes of YOU?

  5. Can you just make out that guy over there on the ridge, the one with the face paint and the big fuckin’ rifle?

  6. And finally: where did you get that AWESOME hat, dude? Pretty sharp look you got there, Hoss, with the little half-inch black hole in the middle-front, and the big red splatter of what passes for brains in the back. Looks GOOD on ya, muthah-fuckah.

17

[Zorro]I just have one question.

How would you like your remains displayed?[/Zorro]

18

Bwah! Brilliant, Sofa King. I applaud you.

:smiley: More vindictive, cathartic fun with the Dopers. I can always count on you guys.

Thanks for making this whole thing a little easier to get through.

19
  1. Doesn’t it piss you off when people forget to preview their posts?

Sigh

20

  1. Are you like this because you were circumcised?

  2. Would you like paper or plastic for your body bag?

  3. Want me to tell Opal you said hi?

  4. How does it feel to be the World’s Worst Father? (marrying your daughter to the head of the fucking TALIBAN says it all)

  5. Would you care to bite me?

  6. Now, would you please take your seat, so you can spend the rest of your life watching the sex scenes from Mitchell?