Hey, CMK…I suppose my cheese-morphing power would only net me a spot in the Substitute Legion, huh?
Nuts…another long evening of playing pinochle with Night Girl and Color Boy…
Uke
[[BigIron…you ever hear of a team called the Mystery Men? You sound like a Prime Candidate! ]] HeathDoolin
Have I ever! Go Carrot! Of course, he has no superpowers, unless you count superhuman boldness.
Did that movie already leave the theaters? I love the idea of Pee Wee as The Spleen.
“Is not much, but at lesat is a superpower.”
Dear Donj:
What makes you think I have any interest in fighting crime?
However, you must admit a power like that would make me hell on super-heroines or super-villainesses.
Actually, the original post did not specify if our super-powers had to be useful against criminals.
Wow, it looks like this thread is taking on a life of its own. I love useless super powers. They are more interesting when you cna fight crimes with them. (YEA! to cheese morphing, I laughed pretty hard at that one.)
A partial list of semi-useless super powers:
Mom’s Berating Voice ("IF I TOLD YOU ONCE…nag, nag, nag…)
Anything on Mystery Men (I liked Invisible Boy, “I am only invisible when no one is looking at me” this included himself.)
Cheese Morphing (you got to love Ukelele Ike’s description of this one.)
Pink Dots (see The Source of Magic, Piers Anthony)
Any others?
I do have a super power! My husband calls it “The Power of Swiss Cheese” - I can locate it within a one mile radius.
You’re all jealous, aren’t you?
Most common question I ask: “What?”
Most common question I get: “Are you really hearing impaired?”
Tengu:
I like him too…but his character never really developed until long after Duplicate Boy was making regular appearances. During that time period, they were all drips…you could really only rate them by power.
Ukelele Ike:
Well, I suppose the Legion could conceivably team you together with Matter-Eater Lad…
Chaim Mattis Keller
I’d have to go with telekinesis. That is, among the powers I don’t already have. 
In other words, Uke, you want an ability that a common blue mold already has? 
I am surprised nobody wanted “multiple orgasms.”
Well, yeah. But no waiting around dank French caves for months…I’d like to be able to do it really fast. Instantaneously, you might say.
Ooooh, I’d completely forgotten about Matter-Eater Lad! Proof positive that the offices of DC Comics were hotbeds of marijuana use in the mid-'60s! Can you just see the looks on the faces of the artists when they read the script? “M-E Lad bites the steel beam; Saturn Girl flies overhead…How am I gonna draw THAT?”
Uke
I like time travel. But I don’t wan’t to screw anything up, so maybe only travel through time in incorporeal form as long as I get to see what really was going on at any given time.
I would like the power to stop time. IE, I’m moving but no one else is. Catch the bad guys while in mid-stride. Pick bullets out of the air. Tie shoelaces together as the running back is going for the TD. Have a month to work on a Thursday deadline…
That Goose inventor on Duck Tales made one.
“It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in an argument” - William McAdoo