You're 24 Years Old ... a Fist-fight Would Solve *What* Exactly?

The BBQ Pit
1

You were being a belligerent prick at the bar, so I calmly asked you to please settle down, I had “no beef” with you. For all I cared, you were a cool guy.

God forbid I ask you to sit down again, being as polite as I can be when some ass-dumpling is spilling beer on my shirt.

I can understand how, under most circumstances, “Shut the fuck up and sit your ass down!” would sound like an assholey thing to say, but fer cryin’ out loud, man, I had already asked you three times! I was giving you the benefit of the doubt, because you were sitting with two friends of mine - one of whom I came to the bar with. I wasn’t the only one trying to get you to stop being a dick to everyone in sight - your own “friends” were doing it, too.

So why must a 24-year-old man with a small child insist on “beating (my) ass” like a fucking 14-year-old testosterone-ridden fuckbucket? Let’s look t the possible outcomes of a fight and subsequent results, shall we?

I win: You get embarrassed - after all, your body wouldn’t hurt as much as your pride would - and try to find me again, this time with either a group of friends or a weapon - possibly both. I don’t want to go to the hospital on account of you, and I’m pretty sure you don’t want to go to prison on account of a “punk-ass bitch” like me.

You win: Yippee. Big man. So kicking my ass proves what exactly? That you have no other redeeming qualities aside from being an oaf? That I can’t fight because I don’t waste my time on trivial bullshit? Or maybe it means that you are now free to be a complete jerk to everyone, everywhere you go, for the rest of your life, because if you don’t like it you’ll just stomp a mudhole in them. What a beautiful life. :rolleyes:

So, bottom line: don’t talk to me when I see you, don’t come into my work strutting around like you’re hot shit, and keep my name out of your mouth.

Stop acting like a child and grow up, man! :mad:

-Dirty

2

A fist fight proves which person is more given to fighting with their fists at that particular time. It indicates as much about the moral value of a person’s beliefs/situation as, say, a basketball game, a sprint or a flame.

This has been a Public Service Message Brought to You by People with No Sense of Humor.

We now return you to something of actual merit.

3

Im confused. Did a fist fight occur or not? Did he challenge you and you said no or what?

4

A 24 year old in a fistfight is merely giving his knuckles something to do other than dragging them on the ground.

Some people should wear a sign: “Please do not feed alcohol to the Neanderthal”.

5

A fistfight gets him an arrest record and sued for assault.

In fact, the threat of violence was assult and he could still be sued, although probably not arrested…

6

Fuck, I must be from a different world.

A fistfight may have in fact, sat him down and shut him up. I’m glad it didn’t come to that, as it’s always best to attempt to difues the situation, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

7

From what I gather you were the voice of reason while he let the alcohol do the talking. My guess would be that you’re the only one proud of what happened last night. Hopefully he’ll learn from it.

8
9

You think that’s bad … here’s a quick story.

Back home some of my friends hang out with this kid occasionally. I’m not certain why. They say, “Hey, he’s a nice guy, and he’s funny as hell.”

Well, as they are punks, they think he’s funny because he freaks out all the time and when he drinks, he just gets worse. I’ve seen him leap into the air to - intentionally - land on his back on a chair in the back yard just to get his kicks and amuse others by him hurting himself.

Once while at a party at their place, I was standing in the kitchen with several others just chatting and he comes flying in like a bat outta hell and starts “moshing” - slamming his body into everyone around even though nobody was the least interested in returning the favor. He made the mistake of backing into me, and within one second I had him pinned to the floor in a choke-hold until I saw him start to get whoozy. I told him to calm the fuck down.

Nobody scolded me for doing this, they just said “It’s Ok, he’s a good guy, he’s just rambunctious.”

Right.

Well my wife told me the other night this scitzoid was at the bar the other night, being his usual asshole self. With his mom.

Both of them had too much to drink and the bartender pretty much wanted them to leave because they were being asshats to everyone around - my wife included. The bartended told them to leave because my wife was a good customer and friendly person who didn’t deserve to be treated like that.

They were asked how they were getting home. They said the son - drunk and freakazoid boy - was going to drive because his mom was too drunk.

My wife said she didn’t think that was a good adea and they should just get a cab.

Freakazoid’s mom, without any notice, reels and starts swinging at my wife, pummeling away at her with her fists.

She was dragged off and they were sent away.

You were understandably annoyed, Earthworm, but that’s just a moron with hormonal issues. When you start dealing with real freaks like we have, then you should start to worry.

10

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t very quick. Sorry, folks.

11

Maybe he was hyped up on testosterone from watching the war coverage?

12

“Some people should wear a sign: 'Please do not feed alcohol to the Neanderthal.” ’

I wish I had had one of those for a good chunk of the 1990’S.:slight_smile:

13

He goes to your job? Or does he already work there?

Gorgon Heap: :eek:

14

Hey Gorgy, who was that bitch? I’ll take a trip up there and show what an over 30 year old fist-fighter can do.

OK, fighting is wrong. No fistfights. Ever!

Except if I ever roll up on that bitch that whaled on AV. All bets are off then.

15

I keep trying to tell people, sometimes a light slap across the throat takes all the fight out of someone.

And sometimes it doesn’t. Either way, if you land it, the odds are good you’re fast enough to land one with some force behind it agian, and end the fight pretty quickly.

16

I know Biggirl, I’ve thought of it a lot myself. “What would I have done had I been there?” I reckon I would have grabbed both of those pricks, drug them to the door and thrown’em out on their asses.

When A_V told me about it I couldn’t believe my ears. I was amazed she hadn’t said anything to me about it earlier.

Friggin’ psychos.

Still, I’ll let her know you’re concerned.

17

A fist fight solves the problem of figuring out who would win a fist fight.
Also, it would have proven to you that you are willing to stand up for yourself no matter what.

I think you should have hit the guy. He obviously deserved it, you’re obviously upset that you didn’t, and he wasn’t willing to hear your less offensive language anyway. There has to be the lingering feeling that you “lost the fight” having backed down before the punches were thrown.

There’s something to be said for being willing to go all the way, something innate and core to one’s manhood.

18

Fistfights are tough on your hands even when you know how to punch properly. A far better option is a stomp to the kneecap, if you are actually convinced that the drunk in question will do more than impotently bellow and threaten. Even sober men seldom see this one coming when they are in “agressive display” mode. A good flat-handed slap delivered to the ear has taken the fight out of more than one belicose drunk while inflicting minimum damage. You probably did the right thing in a moral and ethical sense. Clearly, though, you wish you had flattened the galoot, and I don’t blame you.

19

So you did kick his ass, right? I mean, c’mon he was so deserving of an stomping!

20

“War sub[/sub] doesn’t prove who’s right, it only proves who’s left. . .”

But even I have to admit, sometimes giving a good thumping to someone who deserves it is pretty cathartic.

Tripler
I find my physical build along with a good glare deters others from threatening violence, 'specially when lurkernomore has my back.