Have you heard of a little place called Canada? 
If I didn’t have puke breath*, I’d kiss you.
That whole being married thing dashes the plans, too.
In my movies[/shameless plug], I like to make reference to Rudolph Guiliani (we started making 'em right after 9/11, and Guiliani was the hot-ticket), and an ubiquitous fictional mega-corporation called Delta Co., which owns next-to-everything. I got the name from Del Taco. 
- One of the characters would not wear any socks.
2)Every car in the movie would be in dire need of a tire rotation.
3)Every movie would have a scene where the lead character shaves. If it was a male, he would shave his face. If female her legs. The whole process from start to end would be shown.
4)One character would always have a deep dark secret that wouldn’t be revealed or even alluded to in the film.
Every movie would have at least one shot the perfectly mimicked a famous painting from the Metropolitian Museum of Art in NYC. Maybe not in the same costumes but the compostion and lighting.
Later a Movies by Zebra tour of the museum would be popular.
Oh and naked women, even in my childrens films.
Steganographic content.
By way of example, I worked on a VOD magazine show that used faux “untuned channel” snow for transitions between segments. Very few people knew that the “static” contained animated single image stereograms. (Think “Magic Eye,” only full-motion.)
I like the idea of one-in-a-thousand people accidentally noticing, because they happen to have their eyes unfocused at the time.
“Whoa! Did you see that? A fire-demon with huge bat-wings just flew right out of the screen during that big explosion.”
“Dude, you’re so high.”
Oh…Add that sort of thing to my random comic references - recreation of famous covers, panels, etc.
Like someone wearing a long coat jumping off a ledge, stairway, etc during a thunderstorm and being seen in sillhouette as lightning strikes in the background.
But avoiding the obvious man in a suit and tie ripping his shirt open.
Mine would be:
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An extremely good looking guy wearing a black suit (Topher Grace, I’m looking at you) in different positions that allude to being tied up, such as hands behind their back, sitting on a chair without moving for a few seconds, things like that. Either that, or ACTUALLY being tied up.
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Like a previous poster said before, a famous painting, mimicked by the main character.
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The soundtrack WILL have at least two Pink Floyd songs, and one Atreyu song.
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I will show up in the movie as some insignificant character in a crowd.
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It will rain a lot. Almost every day.
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In a scene, the character will be playing with a prism and watching the light. (This will be an allusion to the Dark Side of the Moon album cover.)
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At least one character WILL be wearing all black.
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A main character mentions the idea of converting the force of the ocean waves into electricity. (So long as it doesn’t deviate significantly from the tone or style of the movie.)
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As an homage to Stephen Spielberg, a reflection shot that provides a character’s reaction to something overwhelming but that also reveals what he’s reacting to. E.g. “Empire of the Sun” where Malkovich looks out the window to see fighter planes coming in, while in the reflection of the window we see the planes. (So long as it doesn’t deviate significantly from the tone or style of the movie.)
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A scene with a dominatrix or strong-willed woman dressed in leather/PVC. (So long as it doesn’t deviate significantly from… aw, fuck it: regardless of the movie’s tone or style.)
Broken telephones. Being the younger, latchkey kid brother of two older, and very, very, popular siblings who were never home, I’ve developed a deep seated hatred of telephones.
And so every movie of mine would feature at least one telephone being bashed, sliced, diced, burned, crushed, molested, chemicaly altered, melted, trashed, and/or beaten into oblivion. I would be as creative as possible with all of the different foul tele’ endings, and maybe even set them up as metaphors before eradicating them from the material sphere.
Oh, and men wearing fedoras. People just aren’t wearing enough hats nowadays.
As a monooptical person, I find this quite insulting!
(No not really, but I had to point it out)
Not to nit pick but Empire of the Sun is probably my favorite movie (after Lesbian Spank Inferno) and it isn’t the planes in reflected in the window you are supposed to notice. It’s Jim. Look at EVERY reaction shot at the beginning of the attack. Jim is in every shot. The window is reflecting Jim jumping up and down on top of the damaged building.
I’m a big fan of subtle, obscure references that few would notice, and fewer would “get.” I’m funny that way-it’s my curse.
•As an onscreen clock reaches 8:19, a character will happen to take his/her hat off.
•If there’s going to be graphic onscreen nudity and/or sex featured, I’ll find some way to signal it during the first few minutes of the film. Likewise, if there’s not going to be any, I’ll signal it. (Probably something like seeing a Russian “nesting doll” on a shelf, or something.)
•Throwaway gags involving human skeletons.
•Ominous references to fascism and/or Nazi Germany. To set the mood when showing villains, but, most importantly, for confusing film school students into thinking I’m putting in some kind of deep hidden subtext that I’m really not.
•Congressman (later Senator) Charles Browne (I.-CA).
•An airline livery that has the rudder decorated with a yellow circle, crossed by two red and blue horizontal stripes.
•Any business being used as a “front company” for villains in one movie will show up in other, unrelated movies. (And the staff will, if you look closely, be seen listening in on the heroes’ conversations.)
I was taking from memory – I thought it would be too difficult to describe the puddle reflecting Malcom in “Jurrassic Park” or the astronaut face shield reflecting Elliott’s brother in “E.T.” I wondered if I would get straightened out on this. But now I want to rewatch that scene.
And thank you for not nitpicking.
By the way, I just remembered a cool example of this: Richard Linklater puts references to James Joyce’s Ulysses in his films. Well, maybe not all of them, but they were definitely in Slacker and Before Sunrise. And Waking Life had a very Finnegans Wake feel to it.
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Just as in 24, everyone in my movies would use Macs, except the bad guys, who would use PCs. Neutral or ambiguous characters would use Linux.
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In homage to one of my favorite films, The Last Detail, each of my movies would include at some point a brief glimpse of three sailors (2 white, 1 black) on liberty.
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Visible in each of my movies would be a Doctor Who scarf.
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Because I don’t drink coffee, every one of my movies would include a character who does not drink coffee, and who at some point will be obligated to point this out (e.g., “Take that away—you know I don’t drink that shit.”).
Ah, then I’d better not mention my desire to include an homage to Orson Welles’ Mr. Arkadin in every picture-- Specifically, whenever a character is compelled to come to terms with an existential problem, there will be, visible in the background, a lensless ‘teleoscope’ and an empty binocular case.
Almost everybody in movies uses Macs. It’s because they’re easier to set up quickly.
- first, my movies would always have a comic relief character be very prominant in the fist 15 minutes. The when he’s telling the main character his next funny joke, just as he is to give the punchline, he gets hit by a car. Throughout the whole movie the joke would be alluded to but the punchline wouldn’t be given.
Only until the main character kills the bad guy at the end would be finally give the punchline.
- Someone would always get bitchslapped with a glove. Whether to signal a challenge for a duel, or for just no reason at all. Not enough glove bitch slaps these days.