You're naming your baby what!

[zev_steinhardt]

Yep, cazzle, that was it.

Zev Steinhardt

[Oilcan]

@AuntiePam

I know it’s none of my business what someone chooses to name their new baby. I’m not contributing to its raising so I should just shut the hell up.

But why do new parents do this to their kids? What’s the matter with a name that actually means something, like a family name, or something that reflects the child’s heritage?

Here’s a list taken from a nursery website, babies born in the past couple of months:

Halee
Keeli
Kaden
Dagen
Acacia
Tayler
Damian (oh no, he won’t get teased)
Alexya
Yesenia
Kiele
Zabiah
Kailean
Mattison
Chivanna
Jaycie
Kharter (!!! better tattoo that on his forehead)
Trenten
Jadyn
Ladira
Alekki
Rainee
Sienna
Leiden

Why do parents do this? Their child’s gonna be plenty special without having to go through life with a name that no one can spell or pronounce, and that doesn’t identify you as male or female.

Are you kidding? The parents of those kids are hidebound traditionalists compared to the ones that issued idiot crap like “Dweezil”, “Moon Unit” and my personal favorite, “Placenta” (Hope she doesn’t separate too soon…).

Then there’s the situationally unsuited, such as “Chastity” for any spawn of Cher…

[Oilcan]

@Inigo Montoya

Damned submit key gets real big when you’ve ODd on caffeine. Oh Well, saved you from the obnoxious long list. My point is, few names carry their original meanings any more–so why should we limit ourselves to to one list of meaningless names when we can also just make stuff up? At least then we have a pretty good chance of giving the kid something unique. Or at least letting them know where they were conceived (Camry, Sienna, Lincoln, Serta…).

Have you no mercy, sir! Think of the poor little tykes running around with names like Nissan Accura and Infiniti (aside: whatever happened to the Infiniti Snot, the greyhaired supercilious guy in their early ads?) and Corolla, for God’s sake.

Didn’t Saturday Night Live do a takeoff on all the names of dubious African heritage (laTwanna, Ikura, etc…) now in use?

Its not fair, but it is definitely a fact that much of the population encountering a unique or alternatively spelled name assumes one thing for sure about the bearer: He or she is descended from twits.

[China_Guy]

At university I had a girlfriend whose mom was Japanese and American father in the Navy and on cruise for up to 6 months at a time. Well, had their daughter and Mom decided to give her a wholesome American name: Jane

Her husband’s surname was Smith.

[badbadrubberpiggy]

@kung fu lola

“Buffy” came into use as a diminuitive of Elizabeth.

[sup]It always bugged me that her tombstone read “Buffy Anne” and not “Elizabeth Anne”. Joyce was too sensible to have named her child “Buffy”… right???[/sup]
.

I’ve got no stake in the baby-naming issue at the moment, but I wanted to comment on Buffy!

Anyway, the show is based on the movie Buffy the Vampire Slayer, though it ended up being quite different. Though Joyce in the show is rational and intelligent, the original mother in the movie was an overly made-up, overly tan, ditz. SHE would have named her child Buffy