Celebrating your divorce

[Kent4mmy]

I've heard of people celebrating their divorce by throwing a "divorce party" but don't know anyone who has personally done this. Do people do this? Myself, I would want to put that experience behind me ASAP. Why celebrate a failure?

[C3]

I worked with a woman once who did this. For her, it was because it had been a loooong time between separation and the finalization of the divorce. I guess she felt a little dragged through the coals, so she thought it was her due to finally have a night out with the girls, letting loose, celebrating her freedom.
I don't this is something I'd do, either, for pretty much the same reasons you said. I didn't go to hers (I can't remember why), but it wasn't because I was taking any sort of moral stand. Just not a choice I'd make personally.

[GolfWidow]

I celebrated my divorce by going out with a bunch of girlfriends for drinks and dinner that evening. It was a "divorce celebration" because from separation to date of dissolution took 13 months and was a relief when it was finally over.

I surely don't think of myself as a failure because my marriage didn't work out. I tried 100% and gave it everything I had; I certainly didn't fail. I do look at it as a growing and learning experience and I walked away having learned some things about me that I don't think I would have ever realized had it not been for the experience. I don't regret my marriage and, once again, although it didn't work, it wasn't a failure.

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"Words fascinate me. They always have. For me, browsing in a dictionary is like being turned loose in a bank." - Eddie Cantor

[smilingjaws]

I celebrated my divorce with a dinner out with friends because:
1) I had to force my ex-husband into accepting the divorce because at the time my state did not have no-fault divorce

2) The 6 months it took to get the divorce was extremely stressful--selling the house, dividing goods, agreeing on visitation/child support

3) My ex-husband had been threatening my family and stalking me. As my husband, the police were totally unwilling to intercede. I hoped the divorce would make them more willing to help in case the stalking and threats continued.

4) I didn't regard my divorce as a failure, but as an opportunity for starting over with some potential for happiness and peace. I don't even consider the marriage a failure on my part--I did every single thing I was expected and supposed to do. The failure was totally mine and it was in selecting an unsuitable candidate for marriage who was incapable of maintaining a job, supporting himself (not to mention a family) and who constantly got into trouble. It was an enormous relief to stop pretending and figure out a way to solve the problem.

I dont' want this to come across as male bashing. Some people (male and female) are simply not suited for the responsibilities of marriage. Some of us got married too young, with little common sense about such things and chose a partner stupidly. No point in mourning something that was ill-fated from day one.

[AWB]

At a divorce party, does the divorsee:

• have to buy presents for all the guests?
• have bouquets/garter belts thrown at them?
• get to decorate all the guests cars?

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Wrong thinking is punished, right thinking is just as swiftly rewarded. You'll find it an effective combination.

[manhattan]

I think this is more MPSIMS territory.

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NYC IRL III
is on April 15th. Do you have what it takes?