Evil Bitch Sister (EBS) Rides Again (minor rant at her Broomstick)

The BBQ Pit
1

Ok…let me vent this here in the Pit as it will keep me from actions my lawyer would regret for me later. Some of you may remember that I have a Money-Grubbing, Benz-Driving, Low-Life Country Club SKANK, and a Morally Challenged Republican Scumbag of an EVIL BITCH SISTER (EBS) (paternity not proven to my satisfaction) who has been trying to steal …err ‘borrow’ money from my nursing home bound fixed-income mother without ever paying it back. (Its up to $40,000 that I know about)

Well, Mom calls me the other day…she’s very excited about the 4th of JULY as EBS has invited her to her house in The Hamptons. I told her I’m very happy for her but that she must be careful: Don’t sign anything, don’t promise anything and don’t bring too much money with her. Look, I cut my own throat if I bad mouth my sister and I know Mom wants to see her kids…so I’m not against it. EBS knows Bank o’ Mom is closed…Mom’s said No enough…its understood. So this should go fine. Besides, I knew Mom had been a little depressed since the death of her best friend at the residential center and I thought a nice sea-side trip might be good for her. That and I planned to ask her all about it as soon as she got back.

Well, the 4the comes & goes and I figure Mom’s having a great time. Then I get a call Saturday that one of EBS daughters (they’re not growing up like her or her Thug of a husband, Thank God) was driving home Sunday and wanted to drop Mom off by my house for me to take her the rest of the way home.

Now its 90 minutes one way from my house, but I really wanted her to see/ play with my boys & have dinner so I happily said “Yes”. My wife is miffed (“three more hours you could play with the boys lost because She doesn’t know how to Host?”) but understood. So, sundsay comes, we stay home & wait. And wait. (its 3-4 hours, traffic depending, one way, and I was expecting a “we’re on our way” call)

By 2:30, my brother, a pretty nice guy, calls & says he was called & told that Mom’s staying over another day & not to worry about it. Now, I didn’t have Six Flags planned or anything, so I’m OK with a quiet Sunday home…but I know my wife did a slow burn. Still, EBS my have grown up enough to realize what being a good Host means, so I’m happy that Mom’s having a good time.

Monday, in the middle of a Really hectic day, I get a voicemail. Its unusual as I never get calls that bounce there…and my cell is on…so I’m wondering who would leave a message for me. I call up the audix and hear the message is from Thug, EBS’s unpleasant husband.

“Hey Quietman, its Thug. You’re Mom’s in Long Island. Come Get Her. Bye…”

[SIZE=4]WTF to the 99th power…[SIZE=4]

My knuckles go white. My face grimaces. My arms start to shake with Berserker Rage. It is the Grace of God that kept me from being a bad cover on The New York Post the next day. Its 3pm…Rush Hour will be in full swing by the time I even get to the other side of Manhattan. This mean 3 Fucking Hours on the LIE One Way, 4 1/2 hours back to her residence & 1 hour home. I’d be coming in the door at Midnight if I was Lucky. There were two things I could do. I could be a Door Mat and go get her. or I could call them back and Curse them Back into the Fucking Stone Ages while embarrassing myself at work.

The more I thought about it, the Angrier I got…until one other thought crossed my mind. If I did nothing…if she couldn’t reach me…then she’d Have to bring Mom home. So I turned off my cell phone. I emailed my wife & explained I can only be reached by emails & IMs for the rest of the day. I told her to turn off her cell phone. And I told her not to answer the phone when she got home (we ended up getting home at the same time).

So far, I haven’t had another phone call…and I’m not missing them at all. I’m going to wait a day more before I call my Mom and see how it went (I doubt she’s in a hurry to head back to LongGuyland anytime soon). And I don’t feel One Damn Bit Guilty…

2

Perfect response. :smiley:

3

You made exactly the right decision. Jesus, what fucking balls to expect you to leave your job with no explanation or warning. And how gutless to tell it to your voice-mail. Your sister lives in the Hamtons and she has to steal money from your mom? Is she a drug addict? Gad what a terrific, howling skank she sounds like.

You’ve piqued my curiosity now. Please give us the update whenever you do call your mom. I’d like to know how your sister reacted when you blew her off.

4

I am amazed at the idiocy of your sister not to mention the inconsideration. I think her broom needs to be ridden straight up her ass.

5

Damn, EBS and Thug sound like some pretty inconsiderate people. Let’s hope they don’t take it out on your mom that they couldn’t reach you, though.

6

May their toes recieve the Curse of the Fires of A Thousand Suns… warmly.

7

Good response.

Make sure to update us on the outsome.

8

Er, “outcome.”

9

I called my Mom this morning at her room…and she’s Fine. She said she had a ‘wonderful time’ at the Hamptons and loved seeing her grand daughters. (I feel its appropriate to note that when you’re 85 and female and of my Mom’s generation, if you go anywhere you’ll say you had a ‘Wonderful Time’ no matter what happens.) She was especially surprised when my Favorite Sister’s (Not EBS) son flew in from the west coast with his GF for a surprise appearance. (Note: I’m quite sure that neither he, his GF, or Mom had Any Clue about the ‘travel arrangements’ issue)

She said the trip home was ‘uneventful’.

I’m not going to tell her about what happened. I may tell my Favorite Sister…in time and only if we get into a ‘funny stories’ session. By then it will be funny…or sad, depending on how close one is to EBS. I am going to make sure that I take my wife & boys down to see Mom next weekend and take her out to a nice restaurant after. About the best move I feel I can make now is just to shake my head & walk away from what happened. Until next time… ?

10

I owe you an answer on this. She owns it…well 5% of it. She’s mortgaged, re-mortgagaed, and debt-layered to the hilt. I’m amazed she has sticks of furniture to fill the rooms (although when Mom sold Mom’s house, she stole the very best. :mad: )
If you found enough food in her fridge to keep a Supermodel alive for a day I’d be shocked. (whenever one of my sons has a birthday I malke sure to insist that all the girls be invited & double the amount of food trays just so I know in my heart those girls have had a decent meal that day). Its all appearances.

One last parting shot: I stopped by last Christmas as the family had gathered there and I remember joking conversations in the kitchen to her girls about the “18 and Out” philosophy of parenting*. I bit my tongue when I though of how ‘stealing from your mother into your 50s’ didn’t quite jibe with it…
*Once you turn 18, you get a set of suitcases as a gift and a week to move out.