This is probably going to be very lame. (Yeah, I know, now you don’t want to read it. Dammit. I knew I shouldn’t have typed that.) I just need to get this off my chest before it crushes me.
My sisters are idiots.
I have 4 sisters. Two of them are driving my entire family nuts with the drama. Fundie Sister has taken it upon herself to point out everything that she sees wrong in our lives. Beach Sister is pretty laid back, but recently has become the Mellodramatic Queen of Bullshit. In the past couple of years, she’s basically become the most over-sensitive person on the planet, and decided that she can’t talk to our family about anything because we’ll all judge her. (I can’t insert enough rolleyes here…)
About 5 years ago, FS called my mom to see what we were having for Christmas dinner. My mom, overworked and underpaid as a housewife, was preparing a HUGE meal, consisting of a turkey, a ham, numerous side dishes, homemade rolls, and a few desserts. FS says, 'well, are you making mashed potatoes? Because that’s all Spoiled Rotten Child has been talking about." My mom said, no, but if FS made them, my mom would make the gravy. FS replied “Tsk. I’m already making the green bean casserole!” (Which no one eats except for me and Innocent Sister.) She hangs up the phone.
Cut to one hour later. FS calls back, to explain how my mom has just broken Spoiled Child’s little heart, and how distraught he is over the fact that he’s not getting his mashed potatoes. My mother replies “oh, he’ll live.” (YAY, Mom!) FS becomes furious. I called her later, to try to resolve the situation, as my mother had called me practically having a breakdown about not preparing enough food. :rolleyes: (This was in mom’s pre-Paxil days.)
FS takes the opportunity to tell me that I am an evil little bitch, I am selfish, and I don’t care about anyone else. (Which, IRL, I don’t toot my own horn, but this is FAR from accurate. Email me about it if you wish.) I finally lose my cool, yell “LET HIM CHOKE ON THE MASHED PO-FUCKING-TATOS! FUCK YOU!”, and hang up the phone. We don’t speak for two years.
Well, now FS has it in for BS. BS is now taking care of Spoiled Child, as FS just can’t handle having a 19 year old kid around the house. Apparently, Spoiled Child got his eyebrow pierced last week, and FS has declared it the End Of the Fucking World[sup]TM[/sup]. Of course, BS must have taken Spoiled Child to get his eyebrow pierced, and paid for it, because Spoiled Child doesn’t have a job. (There’s a more likely possibility that some moronic friend probably did it, and within a month or two it’ll be gangrenous and generally icky.)
Now, FS and BS are not speaking, and BS called Innocent Sister the other day to tell her goodbye, that she’s severing contact with the rest of the family, because she just can’t take the drama any more.
What. The. FUCK. Can’t take the drama anymore? She’s the Susan Lucci of the family, for crissakes, and she CAN’T TAKE THE DRAMA ANYMORE? And FS needs to get her ass off her shoulders. She meeds to accept the fact that Spoiled Child is now 19, he will make his own stupid decisions, and she doesn’t have to worry about seeing him do it since she shipped him off.
Jesus Christ, will someone please write a soap opera about all this so I can cash in, and move to a tropical island?
