A Rabbi approaches a man after service and says, “We could use a donation for the school playground, books in the library, the heating system and some other worthwhile projects.”
The man nods and says, “Rabbi, I have a son who wants to go to Harvard. That is going to cost a hundred thousand dollars. I have two parents with Alzheimer’s, and a private home with treatment is going to cost a hundred thousand dollars. And my wife, she was just diagnosed with MS, and the doctors said the treatments are going to cost a hundred thousand dollars. If I can say no to them…”
;j Loving the Jewish humor. I think I’ll add some of my own, only with less stereotyping of financial habits:
Three reform rabbis are arguing which of their temples is the least religious. One says, “We pass out sandwiches during services!” Another says, “Ha, that’s nothing! We pass out ham sandwiches during services!” The third says, “You’re both a bunch of orthodoxy. During Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, we put up a big neon sign that says ‘Closed for the Holidays’.”
During the Great Depression, Moe and Abe, two impoverished, homeless Jews are wandering the streets, when they pass a Catholic church with a sign that reads, “$50 To Anyone Who’ll Be Baptized.”
Moe says to Abe, “What the hell, fifty bucks is fifty bucks. I think I’ll go in and get baptized.” Moe enters the Church. Fifteen minutes later, he comes walking out."
Abe asks, “Well, did you get the money?”
Moe snaps back, “Money, money, money… is that ALL you people ever think about?”