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#1
05-21-2005, 09:21 AM
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Worst corporate/product mascots
We haven't seen that many good mascots forced upon us by corporate America.
So name some of the worst: The Noid The Arby's oven mitt The current Burger King Whatsit? (from the Atlanta Olympics) That guy from Di-Tech.com 
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#3
05-21-2005, 09:34 AM
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__________________
"Those poor bastards. They've got us right where we want them. We can shoot in every direction now." Colonel Lewis Burwell Puller, USMC, at Chosin Reservoir
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#6
05-21-2005, 10:12 AM
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Not really a mascot but the recent Burger King commercials for beef lovers were the worst. The live cow dining out with or in bed with the beef lover. Implying that as a beef lover I would like to date and have sex with the live animal before consuming its dead flesh was the most bizarre concept ever.
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#8
05-21-2005, 11:20 AM
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Is the Arby's oven mitt a ripoff of the Hamburger Helper oven mitt, or did he get a new job?
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#9
05-21-2005, 12:40 PM
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#11
05-21-2005, 12:58 PM
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The Frito Bandito was around when I was a kid. He was very un-PC and wouldn't have a snowball's chance these days.
To add to the list, M$ Office's "Clippy" the paper clip rubs me the wrong way, too.
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#12
05-21-2005, 01:01 PM
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The Frito Bandito was not particularly disliked until the hispanic community began to point out he was a racist stereotype.
Herb from Burger King is generally considered in advertising as the worst -- he was hated and, more importantly, he didn't sell hamburgers.
__________________
"One never knows, do one?" Provider of quality fantasy and science fiction since 1982.
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#13
05-21-2005, 01:27 PM
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I'm surprised that nobody mentioned the Quizno duo. They went from the weird "We want the subs" animated characters to "Baby Bob" who creeps me out in so many ways. If you see this Jayjay, you know what will happen if you start with the song...........
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#16
05-21-2005, 03:29 PM
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Do professional sports mascots count since they're corporate owned? If so, I'd like to nominate Alabama's newest professional baseball team, The Montgomery Biscuits (probably the only professional sports mascot named after a carbohydrate). The truly great part: in the city that brought you Roy Moore and Gerald Allen (they're not from there but they "did their stuff" there as state officials), the mascot of the baseball team is Big Mo. (For those not in the know, Mo is slang in some circles for hoMOsexyul, and this one has a buttery tongue and wants to be eaten.)
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#17
05-21-2005, 04:10 PM
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#18
05-21-2005, 04:53 PM
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They have a peppah bah!
"Can you hear me now?"
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#20
05-21-2005, 05:51 PM
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#21
05-21-2005, 06:12 PM
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All the mascots mentioned so far have been famous and/or durable enough that most people know who they are, so they may have sucked, but they couldn't have been that unpopular.
The least popular mascots I can think of are (1) Sport Marty of SportMart. He's in the third picture down, under Bupkes the Bagel and next to the talking stomach. A life-sized, human puppet. I think he lasted about a week. (2) Mr. Delicious of Rax. The 2 Nov 2004 entry of the linked blog actually blames him for the demise of this once-vaunted fast-food chain. He came and went so fast that even in this consumerism-saturated age of ours the above link is one of only two Google hits for "Mr. Delicious" and Rax. Tick-a-dee-dee!
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#22
05-21-2005, 06:36 PM
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#23
05-21-2005, 10:29 PM
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#25
05-21-2005, 10:39 PM
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Remember the Puttermans?
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#27
05-21-2005, 11:21 PM
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#28
05-21-2005, 11:33 PM
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Does anybody remember "Face"? He was a disembodied face that was the mascot for Anheuser Busch's Eagle Snacks when the company challenged Frito-Lay for control of the junk food market in the 90's. I recall that shortly after Eagle Snacks introduced the "Face" ad campaign, Anheuser Busch pulled the plug on the division and Eagle Snacks' products suddenly vanished from grocery store snack food aisles across the country. The official explanation for Eagle Snacks abrupt departure was inability to compete with Frito-Lay, but I can't help but wonder that the creepiness of the "Face" character to people was what really killed Eagle Snacks.
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#29
05-21-2005, 11:39 PM
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There is a cave in Alabama called Desoto Caverns. Their mascot, named for de Soto of course, is Happy Hernando, a guy in a suit with a big fluffy head who commemorates the man who brought smallpox, Rottweilers, the Inquisition, slavery and forced concubinage to the natives. (Rejected mascots include Smiley Smallpox, Jumpy Jenny-Side and Impy Imperialism.)
The park also has a playhouse in the shape of a galleon that used to prominantly featured on the park's brochure- it's "hull" filled with little black children. Apparently when political correctness invaded the south, the die-hards headed for the caves.
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#30
05-22-2005, 12:51 AM
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It was back in the days when I was still in the DEP (Delayed Enlistment Program). For those of you who don't know what that means: It means I signed the papers and was just waiting for my day to go to Basic. Still mostly a civilian, but with the odd meeting to go to and stuff you're strongly suggested to volunteer for.
One of the volunteer things was helping out at an air show at the local municipal airport. I hauled some stuff, helped set up the Air Force booth... and then something bizarre happened. My recruiter had a suit he wanted me to wear. This suit was a big balloon-suit affair, which was kept constantly inflated with a fan unit. All set up, it stood about eight feet tall. But what really got me was what the suit was of. It was a big-headed Air Force recruiter. Named "Ricky Recruiter". I shit you not. And he wanted me to wear that. As politely as I could manage, I excused myself from the airshow and got the hell out of there, all the while thinking You don't own me quite yet. While I still have the smallest shred of dignity, I am not wearing the god damn Ricky Recruiter suit! I did, however, catch a glimpse of him in the suit. One day, while the government still owns my body, they may call upon me to wear the Suit. I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of in my life. If ordered to, I'll go to a godforsaken desert to fight for a cause I don't believe in for a President who I never voted for. But if they order me to wear a damned Ricky Recruiter suit, well... if it's all the same to you, sir, I'll take the Article 15.
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#31
05-22-2005, 02:07 AM
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Walmart's bouncing yellow smiley face is pretty hateful.
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#32
05-22-2005, 02:25 AM
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(o/~ I get bigger when you void, I'm Hank the Happy Hemmorrhoid! o/~)
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#33
05-22-2005, 02:32 AM
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While they're not "corporate," the last couple of Summer Olympics mascots have been rather fugly, IMO.
Cobi, summer 1992 Izzy, summer 1996 Syd, Millie, and Ollie, summer 2000 Athena and Phevos, summer 2004 (I'd throw in the winter Olympics as well, but Haakon and Kristin (winter 1994) weren't bad, and Powder, Copper, and Coal (winter 2002) were great) As for corporate mascots, the Verizon "Can you hear me now?" guy really gets on my nerves. Grade-A DorkTM.
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#34
05-22-2005, 11:40 AM
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Duck (kind of bouncing along): AFLAC Frog approaches Duck: AFLAC Frog opens mouth Duck: A... [i]Frog closes mouth around duck[i] Duck: AFFFFFLLLLAAACCCCCC
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#35
05-22-2005, 12:13 PM
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If you have a sore that has you Bi-----n' put this on and quit your itching!!
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#36
05-22-2005, 12:25 PM
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Whatisit // As he later became known as "Izzy". -- The joke around Atlanta at the time, was that the Marathon course (denoted by a continuous blue stripe that was found on roads downtown) was Izzy's Blood/Skin leaving a trail behind him, where local Atlantans drug him out and beat him up.
Weren't the Quizno's rat things (Sp someting monkeys?) a take off (or rip-off) of a Internet diversion? -Baby Bob had his own show on CBS for a second right? Helping Hand (The Betty Crocker Hamburger Helper mascot) can give Oven Mitt the finger.  . -But they are both Right hand men, and Handy men by trade, so I guess we should glove them for who they are. Jay Leno apparently hates the Burger King King, recently (Month of May) the King has been in many of the "bit" segments right after the dialouge. (I assume that BK is paying for this stragetic hatred however, as the actual King is preasnt in studio, or for the stunts) I like Mr.Peanut ... His character seems to be "perfect". Then again, the Christmas commercial where as a child he gets his famous hat as a present was one of the best commercials for last december. No mention of Joe Cammel and Spuds Mckennzie? They where a little before my time (If Joe was indeed ever on TV... Ive seen some later Joe Cammel ads in the 90s) Then you also had that McDonalds Tonight Moon man thing.... who got taken off for ripping off Mack The knife.... Oh, and if you ask me, Poppin Fresh (Pillsbury Dough boy) was the original Pokemon.
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#37
05-22-2005, 12:29 PM
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Wow, just way to many to mention here.
I like how the Pets.com Sock Puppet (He more or less gained that as his offical name.... its how he signed his autobiography) found work, and was "given a second chance" working for Bar None Auto Loans. Also, I like how the current Kool-aid Commercial (Mr.Koolaid /Koolaid Man ((The big pitcher with human feet)) ) is on a quiz show.... With Mr.Peanut and the Super Golden Crisp Bear.. ((I assume they are somehow ""Cousins"" Also, the Tony the Tiger / Corn Flake ads from a few years back... had Tony "Hiding" in the back ground of the commercials.
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#39
05-22-2005, 12:35 PM
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#40
05-22-2005, 01:30 PM
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#41
05-22-2005, 09:13 PM
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I'm suprised nobody nominated "Enzyte Bob" yet.
As much as I get creeped out by the new Burger King I just can't bring myself to hate him since getting Hootie (Darius, whatever) to sing about that chicken ranch. I want to try whatever they were smoking (I still haven't tried the sandwich) when they came up with that commercial.
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#42
05-22-2005, 09:18 PM
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Don't get eliminated, A guy who got the reference
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#44
05-22-2005, 10:08 PM
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Another vote for Burger King's newest mascot. He's beyond creepy. If I woke up one morning and found him in bed with me, I'd probably grab the heaviest object I could lay my hands on, and beat him until he stopped breathing. Ditto for if I found him staring in my window like a deranged stalker. Either of those incidents would cause me to run down to the Secretary of State's office and apply for a Concealed Carry Permit.
Sorry BK, but getting Hootie to hawk your food does not make up for the horrors of The King.
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#45
05-22-2005, 11:45 PM
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#47
06-01-2005, 06:52 AM
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The jokes are juvenile at best, and get repeated. The "North pole" at Christmas, the sputtering water hose, the Golf club/putter. Then again, the entire subject can't escape what it helps do. I guess its here to stay.
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#48
06-01-2005, 08:00 AM
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Unless you'd prefer to see more of Mike Ditka hawking boner pills. Personally, that's something I can live without. -Joe
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#49
06-01-2005, 08:55 AM
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#50
06-01-2005, 12:20 PM
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