What do you call 1000 heavily armed lesbians?
Militia Etheridge.
What do you call a guy who can bench press 500 and use the word ‘sesquipedalian’ in a sentence?
William F. Bulky
Call them anythjing you like, they still won’t come to you.
Weak one: What do you call a fish with no eye?
fsh
What do you call a dog with no legs!
Oh, wait…
Okay, what do you call your mother in law driving your brand new Mustang off a cliff?
Mixed emotions!
(Yeah, it’s low class and mysogi… misagy… misogy… ah fuck it! It’s a bad joke.)
What do you call a drummer who just broke up with his girlfriend?
Homeless.
What do you call a deer with one eye?
No idea.
What do you call a man with a wooden head?
Edward.
What do you call a man with two wooden heads?
Edward Wood.
What do you call a man with three wooden heads?
Edward Woodward.
http://pedia.newsfilter.co.uk/wikipedia/e/ed/edward_woodward.html
Heh–this joke made no sense at all to me until I read your location. I wonder how many jokes are like that, jokes that are nonsensical to folks who speak the same language but with different accents?
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back when you throw it?
A stick.
Daniel
What do you call a dear with no eyes and no legs?
Still no idea.
What do you call a woman flying an airplane?
A pilot. You sexist bastard.
A man goes into a fish shop with a cod under his arm. He says to the fish monger: “'Scuse me mate, do you do fish cakes?” Fish monger says: “Yeah, course we do.” Man says: “Great! It’s his birthday today!”
What do you call a million lawyers at the bottom of the sea?
An excellent start.
My standard complement:
What do you call a man who comes through your mailbox?
Bill.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who hangs on your wall?
Art.
What do you call a man who lies on the ground in front of your door?
Matt.
What do you call a man who’s been buried in a bog for 20 years?
Pete.
What do you call a woman with no arms, no legs, and turned inside out?
Ava Gina!
You devil! How could I be so blind?
You look nice.
(Yeah, I cain’t spail, hurts my readin, too)
. . . in the ocean?
Bob.
What do you call two guys WNAAL hanging on your wall over the window?
Curt ‘n’ Rod.
What do you call a forum for “arts and entertainment”? Answer: Cafe Society.
What do you call a forum for joke after joke with no rhyme or reason connecting them? Answer: MPSIMS.
What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians?
A drummer !!!
Disclaimer:
Okay, I was rather politically incorrect in thinking that only guys are drummers.
AND I’m sure I’m going to catch Hell from all those drummers who do consider themselves musicians. (Both of them 
)