This is my first real pitting of a Doper, and I know I’m going easy on him.
Lobsang, you’re an obssesive, stalkerish, freak. At first your crush on your female friend was cute. There were a few inconsistencies, but hey- when we’re blinded by infatuation, we all make mistakes, and it was a nice story. Then it was kind of sad, because it was so clearly unrequited and we all know how that feels. Then it sailed into boring, because you wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it. Then it became creepy, because not only wouldn’t you shut the fuck up about it, not only were you no further along in recognizing that it’s hopeless, not only were you going out of your way to be a jerk to the girl’s boyfriend, but you were doing all these things despite the fact that the girl knew about your crush and CLEARLY didn’t return your feelings.
This post is the absolute end. The last straw. She “made” you say mean things about someone. She “made” you a bastard. She then apparently “made” you go up to this poor unsuspecting guy and repeat not only your own feelings, but the feelings of your friends (which, incidentally, you have NO FUCKING RIGHT TO DO, and were I your friend, and you betrayed my confidence in this manner, I’d find unimaginable ways to make your life hell).
You are not in love. Were you in love, you would recognize that this girl has made it clear, many times over, in probably six or seven different languages, that YOU ARE NOT THE GUY FOR HER. You are crazy-obsessed, and this girl is better off without you.
I’d say seek professional help, but you know- I don’t want to knowingly unleash you on one of my colleagues. So instead I’ll say: grow the fuck up, stop acting like a goddamn puppy, STOP HARASSING THIS WOMAN AND HER BOYFRIEND, and pull your goddamn pathetic head out of your oversized fucking ass. It’s not going to happen. You’re not going to get the girl. She’s not going to wake up one day and decide you are the end-all, be-all of her existence. She’s probably tolerating you because you must be an endless source of amusement in a “look how I make the monkey dance” sort of way, which, while sad, is EXACTLY WHAT YOU REDUCED YOURSELF TO.
Now kindly shut the fuck up.
-BK