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  #1  
Old 06-25-2009, 10:55 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Michael Jackson is alive!
Under all the pressure the public has put Michael Jackson through the past several years, is it safe to assume Michael Jackson is dead to us? Were doctors ordered to blotch his facial surgeries over the years so he'd become our ever entertaining circus act (Let's make one of the first African American's to enter pop culture turn into a Caucasian). Entertainment is so powerful, yet so often utilized by the common man. Michael was a master of this. Perhaps he's still alive and livin it up with Farrah Fawcett on a(no ignorance allowed here)beautiful Pacific island(just like Amelia Earhart, the girl who walked alone). They were friends, it's possible. Then again they could've died just like the AUTHORITIES claimed. However the LA Times claimed he was dead, then in a coma, then dead again. Fox news said they weren't sure until about seven o'clock and I say it could all be hogwash. Whichever be the case, I'd say they were both pinup thrillers in their own rights and now I think I'll go do the moonwalk, hee heeeee...go on girl.
Last edited by ebbtide3721; 06-25-2009 at 10:58 PM.
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  #2  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:14 PM
Smeghead Smeghead is offline
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Go away.
  #3  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:17 PM
Idle Thoughts Idle Thoughts is offline
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So you got your thread closed down in GQ and got so pissed at that you decided to repost it here?
  #4  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:22 PM
Mahaloth Mahaloth is offline
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You registered to do this?

Reported.
  #5  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:27 PM
Johnny L.A. Johnny L.A. is offline
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This just in: Michael Jackson is still dead.

So is Generalissimo Francisco Franco.
  #6  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:35 PM
blondebear blondebear is online now
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So the London concerts are still on? I need to know if I should keep my airline tickets!
Last edited by blondebear; 06-25-2009 at 11:36 PM.
  #7  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:35 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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No, I wasn't angry, I just reposted it in it's proper.Why is there so much hostility towards my observational theory?
  #8  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:39 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Definitely cancel your airline tickets, if he is alive he's only doing private shows. However, soon you will be able to buy his previously unreleased albums. Enjoy!
  #9  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:45 PM
Mahaloth Mahaloth is offline
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Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
No, I wasn't angry, I just reposted it in it's proper.Why is there so much hostility towards my observational theory?
Classic example of a misunderstanding of a "theory."

You have a wild ass crazy idea that has no basis in reality. A theory needs evidence to interpret and make predictions.
  #10  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:51 PM
Sage Rat Sage Rat is offline
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Zombie Je...Jackson! Flee! Flee for your liiiiiiiiiiiiiiives!
  #11  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:59 PM
Alienhand Alienhand is offline
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Oh fucking hell. The OP just reminded me that MJ sightings are going to start tomorrow (if not already) and go on for decades.
Last edited by Alienhand; 06-25-2009 at 11:59 PM.
  #12  
Old 06-25-2009, 11:59 PM
cmyk cmyk is online now
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Conspiracy Theory's already out before the body even cools. Great, the debunking is going to get exhausting over the years. Who's got 1st shift?
  #13  
Old 06-26-2009, 12:00 AM
cmyk cmyk is online now
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Oh fucking hell. The OP just reminded me that MJ sightings are going to start tomorrow(if not already) and go on for decades.
Yeh, I was just talking about this with my wife and friend. He might go on to be spotted even more than Elvis. Shoot, our OP already has him hanging out with Farrah, fergodsakes.
Last edited by cmyk; 06-26-2009 at 12:01 AM.
  #14  
Old 06-26-2009, 12:47 AM
Idle Thoughts Idle Thoughts is offline
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Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
No, I wasn't angry, I just reposted it in it's proper.Why is there so much hostility towards my observational theory?
Actually, people seem to tend to be more hostile over misleading thread titles. : p
  #15  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:11 AM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Part of my theory states that he's alive. Read it carefully and tell me why it can't be true. I'll have to respond to you tomorrow though, because I' m going to bed. Goodnight family! I love you in every American way.
-AB, Fl.
  #16  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:14 AM
Guinastasia Guinastasia is offline
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My cat's breath smells like bullshit.
  #17  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:14 AM
Jragon Jragon is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sage Rat View Post
Zombie Je...Jackson! Flee! Flee for your liiiiiiiiiiiiiiives!
Zombie MJ is a BAD thing? That'd be like, hands down, the most badass rendition of Thriller ever.


Just sayin'.
Last edited by Jragon; 06-26-2009 at 01:15 AM.
  #18  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:23 AM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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.......
Last edited by ebbtide3721; 06-26-2009 at 01:25 AM.
  #19  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:25 AM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Originally Posted by Jragon View Post
Zombie MJ is a BAD thing? That'd be like, hands down, the most badass rendition of Thriller ever.


Just sayin'.
I know jragon, I'd love to give him a hug right now(Please, no sick little boy jokes.Not now.). This is more personal to me than people think, that's what makes this observation so hard. Goodnight...
Last edited by ebbtide3721; 06-26-2009 at 01:27 AM.
  #20  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:47 AM
cmyk cmyk is online now
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Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
...This is more personal to me than people think, that's what makes this observation so hard. Goodnight...
That MJ's a zombie?
  #21  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:27 AM
Nava Nava is offline
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No, that ebbtide's a zombie troll.
  #22  
Old 06-26-2009, 03:49 AM
Der Trihs Der Trihs is offline
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Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
Goodnight family! I love you in every American way.
-AB, Fl.
At least it's not in the Liechtensteinian way.
  #23  
Old 06-26-2009, 04:59 AM
Dijon Warlock Dijon Warlock is offline
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My cat's breath smells like bullshit.
What on earth are you feeding your cat???
  #24  
Old 06-26-2009, 05:09 AM
Tristan Tristan is offline
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What on earth are you feeding your cat???

Observational theories, looks like.
  #25  
Old 06-26-2009, 06:38 AM
mobo85 mobo85 is offline
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It all makes perfect sense: Elvis really is alive, Paul McCartney really is dead, and Micheal Jackson is really a bricklayer from Paterson, New Jersey named Leon Kompowski.

Or maybe it doesn't.
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  #26  
Old 06-26-2009, 06:50 AM
Locrian Locrian is offline
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Originally Posted by cmyk View Post
Yeh, I was just talking about this with my wife and friend. He might go on to be spotted even more than Elvis. Shoot, our OP already has him hanging out with Farrah, fergodsakes.
There was at least 50 MJs out in Hollywood tonight. Where in the hell is my rip-off "Beat It" jacket??
  #27  
Old 06-26-2009, 07:04 AM
Half Man Half Wit Half Man Half Wit is online now
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Is this some kind of record for fastest conspiracy theory ever?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sage Rat View Post
Zombie Je...Jackson! Flee! Flee for your liiiiiiiiiiiiiiives!
Though, in MJ's case, he's probably less undead than merely recycled.
  #28  
Old 06-26-2009, 09:19 AM
Smeghead Smeghead is offline
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Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
No, I wasn't angry, I just reposted it in it's proper.Why is there so much hostility towards my observational theory?
Forum rules prevent an honest answer.
  #29  
Old 06-26-2009, 12:34 PM
smoke smoke is offline
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I guess I just want to know what the OP did to edit this post. Did you go back in after the fact to remove the paragraph breaks and all-around rationality, or was it somehow worse before?
  #30  
Old 06-26-2009, 12:53 PM
The Hamster King The Hamster King is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
Part of my theory states that he's alive. Read it carefully and tell me why it can't be true.
I think you're Michael Jackson. Prove me wrong.
  #31  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:18 PM
Der Trihs Der Trihs is offline
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Is this some kind of record for fastest conspiracy theory ever?
No, people were already speculating that he wasn't really dead in the original MJ death threads. Although "maybe it's a publicity stunt !" is more rational than the OP.
  #32  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:22 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
No, I wasn't angry, I just reposted it in it's proper.Why is there so much hostility towards my observational theory?
That's about as honest as it get's. This subject wasn't easy to keep alive(excuse the pun).
  #33  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:27 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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I think you're Michael Jackson. Prove me wrong.
Give me your address and I'll send you a sample of my left butt cheek for you to study. That ought to be enough evidence for you.
  #34  
Old 06-26-2009, 01:49 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Michael Jackson probably is dead,but there's a small possibility that he's alive. People have faked there own deaths in the past(usually for insurance reasons). In Michael's case he would do it to escape the massive horde of media fed mutants that used to be his fans. Whether he's dead or just playing dead,who knows? In either situation, it was the public that killed Michael Jackson. All their jokes and accusations gave the man a heart attack. I'm lookin in the man in the mirror, I've already changed his ways. I suggest you do the same(if you haven't already). My heart goes out to his family.
  #35  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:02 PM
ReuvenB ReuvenB is offline
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Originally Posted by ebbtide3721 View Post
Give me your address and I'll send you a sample of my left butt cheek for you to study. That ought to be enough evidence for you.
Could be anyone's left butt cheek.
  #36  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:04 PM
ratatoskK ratatoskK is offline
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Michael and Elvis are on Planet X somewhere in space...
  #37  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:04 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Originally Posted by Der Trihs View Post
No, people were already speculating that he wasn't really dead in the original MJ death threads. Although "maybe it's a publicity stunt !" is more rational than the OP.
Let's see, he announces he's going to do a farewell tour and then dies at fifty from a heart attack. Fox News and the LA Times stretch the situation out for ten hours while the public media mutants eat up their stories and click ads. I'd say there's definitely a publicity stunt going on and it's possible everything I said is true(possible, but not probable). I's not irrational to observe the possibility that he may have run away from us. It would be irrational not to.
  #38  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:12 PM
ebbtide3721 ebbtide3721 is offline
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Could be anyone's left butt cheek.
Could be your left butt cheeck...hee...heeee
  #39  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:21 PM
pravnik pravnik is offline
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Big propblem with the theory: there's a dead body undergoing an autopsy at the LA County Coroner's office today. If he faked his own death, he's on the run for the murder of a Michael Jackson impersonator.
  #40  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:36 PM
Shark Sandwich Shark Sandwich is offline
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Big propblem with the theory: there's a dead body undergoing an autopsy at the LA County Coroner's office today. If he faked his own death, he's on the run for the murder of a Michael Jackson impersonator.
Well, that could be any straight-haired, bleached skin, 5'9" tall, 100-pound, African American, with extensive plastic surgery, now couldn't it?
  #41  
Old 06-26-2009, 02:38 PM
Gary "Wombat" Robson Gary "Wombat" Robson is offline
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We already closed the one in GQ - this is better suited for the Cafe Society or Pit threads, anyway.
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