How can you tell if there's sparks?

[TruePisces]

A friend and I were recently discussing moving relationships beyond friendship, and how to tell if there's more there. I told him one way I know is I use the "kiss test"... when I kiss someone, does my heart do flip flops and my stomach end up in my knees, or does it feel more like I'm kissing my brother?

So what I'm wondering is how other people know if you're headed for love or staying on the path of friendship?

TruePisces

[Upham]

My plan is to make absolutly no move in any direction which might end up in me looking like a fool till we're married.

I figure by then i should have it figured out.

[robgruver]

If I cannot stand to be away from the person that I am with for any extended time, then I know that is true love. My wife and I have not been apart for more than 4 days since the day we met. For the record that was Dec. 21st 1998, and have been married for 10 months.

[Eutychus]

Not for nuttin', robgruver, but that post/sig matchup just blew up my irony meter.

[Snooooopy]

Originally posted by TruePisces
A friend and I were recently discussing moving relationships beyond friendship, and how to tell if there's more there. I told him one way I know is I use the "kiss test"... when I kiss someone, does my heart do flip flops and my stomach end up in my knees, or does it feel more like I'm kissing my brother?

So what I'm wondering is how other people know if you're headed for love or staying on the path of friendship?

TruePisces

What if I don't have a brother I can kiss?

[robgruver]

[hijack]
Eutychus: Exactlly. I like to keep people off guard. But to the point, I am a big fan of movies, so you will see it change quite often I am sure. That is until someone gives me a better sig.
[/hijack]

[Persephone]

Nice one, Euty!

When I'm away from the one I love for an extended period of time, I know it's true love if I know that when i get home, everything will be just as I left it.

Dishes piled in the sink, laundry piled in the basement, trash needing to be taken out, you know. He didn't touch anything because he didn't want to disturb it, because I must have left it that way for a reason, you know?

Sigh. Makes my heart feel good.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by Snooooopy
What if I don't have a brother I can kiss?

Hmmm. Never thought about that. Wanna borrow one of mine?

TruePisces

[Carina42]

Personally, I have had the stomach & heart flip~flops while kissing with people I didn't particularly even LIKE, I just wanted to get them naked with me. So, for me anyhow, that has never been an indicator of anything other than sexual spark.

Love? I kind of like Persephone's definition!

[handy]

Being a guy,there are few women on the planet that don't give me a rush.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by handy

Being a guy,there are few women on the planet that don't give me a rush.

Yeah, but how do you know if it's just sex, or something more? And what about when it's an online relationship headed for something more?

Example: Been friends with someone online for years, like and respect said person. Finally get a chance to meet, start thinking "Wow! This could possibly be more than just a friendship!" How do you tell if it is, or if your hormones are just getting in the way??

TruePisces

[TheNerd]

Wish I knew, Fishy.

I just count myself lucky if I ever hear from them again after meeting for the first time. Sometimes it doesn't even get that far.

But since you're talking about an existing friendship, if you're already wondering, then talk to the other person, see if they are too. Or ask more directly, with the kiss test.

[Nacho4Sara]

For me, it's always in the eye contact. If I really like someone, that's fine and dandy, but if our eyes meet and I feel like I just got hid upside the head with a firecracker, than I usually consider making a move. And sometimes, if I get the firecracker thing (which is great by itself) combined with the extended eye-contact/stomach-feeling-like-it's-floating feeling, then I know I need to make a move immediatly.

I've always believed that while you are going through and getting out of the initial discovery stage, if you find you have lots and lots to talk about, it's a good sign that the relationship could survive. But if, once you get the sex stuff out of the way, you have absolutely nothing to discuss and you find yourself questioning the other's hairtsyle, than maybe it isn't going to last. And that's basically the extent of my relationship knowledge.

Keep in mind that I'm 19, however, and woefully inexperianced with relationships (just three under my belt, neither made it past the six month mark.)

[handy]

"Yeah, but how do you know if it's just sex, or something more?"

There is no set answer for something like this. Ask a hundred people, get a hundred answers.

It's much easier for me, I just let the woman decide that.

[Turpentine]

Yeah, somebody let me know when some sort of conclusion may be reached, because I was wondering the same thing myself.

I like the firecracker test.

I have a lot of male friends, but they don't always make me feel fizzy just by hearing their voice, or by extended eye contact.

One of them does these things to me however, and I was wondering if....
Well, I have the same question. I'm sorry I can't help you Fishy, but you're certainly not alone.

[Snooooopy]

If you throw a lit firecracker at your friend, and your friend forgives you, it's love.

[Meephead]

Originally posted by Snooooopy
If you throw a lit firecracker at your friend, and your friend forgives you, it's love.

On the other hand, my experience has shown that this approach could possibly blow it for you.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by Turpentine
I have a lot of male friends, but they don't always make me feel fizzy just by hearing their voice, or by extended eye contact.

One of them does these things to me however, and I was wondering if....
Well, I have the same question. I'm sorry I can't help you Fishy, but you're certainly not alone.

Well, it's not exactly a current situation, more of a hypothetical-that-someday-might-not-be-but-I-want-to-know-the-score-just-in-case situations. I was kinda thinking about it when I got hit on by a couple different male online friends after my recent break-up, and started talking with another friend. The whole online aspect of it just brings it into a realm I've never dealt with before. And I'm not even talking real love her, but more the possibility of it.

Usually, it's meet someone and "love at first site" or "good friends and then whammo!" You know that person, in some ways, a lot more intimately than your online pals. You either have the firecracker test or the kiss test or a variety of others (like the "Can I live without them?" question) But when you meet someone online, get to be good friends with them, THINK there could be something more, but don't have the opportunity to meet... Well, it makes you wonder what happens when you DO, and if there IS, how do you KNOW that your hormones just aren't in overdrive from all the new emotions of meeting a friend face to face?

Am I babbling? I think I am. I'll shut up now.

[handy]

Car door test: Lock both doors, unlock her door, see if she then unlocks your door, if she does, great.

Laundry test: Dry your clothes there at the laundromat. Find a pretty girl, drop a clean sock near her, see if she picks it up, if yes, great girl.

[Snooooopy]

Originally posted by Meephead

On the other hand, my experience has shown that this approach could possibly blow it for you.

But if you're looking to BANG somebody, you've got to take some risks.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by Snooooopy

But if you're looking to BANG somebody, you've got to take some risks.

GROAN! GROWL! ARG!

*throws firecrackers at Snooooopy*

[Meephead]

Originally posted by Snooooopy

But if you're looking to BANG somebody, you've got to take some risks.

...but what if it lead you to pop the question?

[Eo Echo]

But whatever you do, don't just come out and proclaim your love. All that does is expose your neck. Please pardon my bitterness. I'll try not to get any on you.

[Nacho4Sara]

Oh Lordy, I am horrified at what I have spawned with the "firecracker" comment.

Keep it coming, Snoooopy.

He'll be at the Laugh Room next week. You people have been great. Don't ever change.

[Snooooopy]

Originally posted by TruePisces

GROAN! GROWL! ARG!

*throws firecrackers at Snooooopy*

Look, I meant a FEW firecrackers, not the entire inventory of Crazy Joe's House of Exploding Things (conveniently located just off Interstate 75).

Nonetheless, I forgive you. We can have our first date in the burn center that I'm recovering at -- that is, when I'm not undergoing skin graft treatments so painful that I pray to God every night for a merciful exit from this cruel world.

And we are NOT watching any freaking NASCAR.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by Snooooopy
Look, I meant a FEW firecrackers, not the entire inventory of Crazy Joe's House of Exploding Things (conveniently located just off Interstate 75).

Nonetheless, I forgive you. We can have our first date in the burn center that I'm recovering at -- that is, when I'm not undergoing skin graft treatments so painful that I pray to God every night for a merciful exit from this cruel world.

And we are NOT watching any freaking NASCAR.

Is there any place safe for me to kiss it and make it better? I've been told I have a healing touch!

And we can wait on NASCAR.... the official start of the season doesn't start for another 3 weeks, 5 days and approximately 5 1/2 hours. So we have time!

[UncleBill]

Originally posted by TruePisces
(edited)
Well, it's not exactly a current situation, more of a hypothetical-that-someday-might-not-be-but-I-want-to-know-the-score-just-in-case situations.

You either have the firecracker test or the kiss test or a variety of others (like the "Can I live without them?" question) But when you meet someone online, get to be good friends with them, THINK there could be something more, but don't have the opportunity to meet... Well, it makes you wonder what happens when you DO, and if there IS, how do you KNOW that your hormones just aren't in overdrive from all the new emotions of meeting a friend face to face?
[/b]

True, darling, I didn't realize how deeply you felt about us. But with me, honey, the KISS test is virtually identical to the FIRECRACKER test!

But more seriously, in my experience the newness needs to fade away and talks needs to move from the this-is-what-I've-done to this-is what-we-will-do. The opening the car door without thinking about it type of consideration for another, or touching a person just because he/she is there, being comfortable with silence, these are all indications beyong the stomach-flipping scene that what you have is more than a physical/emotional attraction.

Now, less seriously, can I get in line for this test?

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by UncleBill
True, darling, I didn't realize how deeply you felt about us. But with me, honey, the KISS test is virtually identical to the FIRECRACKER test!

And I thought I was hiding it so WELL!

But more seriously, in my experience the newness needs to fade away and talks needs to move from the this-is-what-I've-done to this-is what-we-will-do. The opening the car door without thinking about it type of consideration for another, or touching a person just because he/she is there, being comfortable with silence, these are all indications beyong the stomach-flipping scene that what you have is more than a physical/emotional attraction.

Very good point. It's the little things more than the big things that make the difference. A phone call when you know they're having a bad day. Just a quick stop to give a kiss good morning. Feeling comfortable just holding each other on the couch in front of the fire while talking about your day... those kinds of things. Of course, that STILL doesn't tell you if you should take the big jump in the first place!

Now, less seriously, can I get in line for this test?

Of course, darling! I'd be more than willing to administer the test to you!

[Snooooopy]

Originally posted by TruePisces
Is there any place safe for me to kiss it and make it better? I've been told I have a healing touch!

Is there any place to kiss? I don't know ... maybe you could start with my lily-white ass. Just be careful with the bandag ... YEEEOUCH!! THE PAIN!!

And we can wait on NASCAR.... the official start of the season doesn't start for another 3 weeks, 5 days and approximately 5 1/2 hours. So we have time!

Thanks for the exact date. Now I know when I need to place that order for cyanide pills.

[UncleBill]

[quote]Originally posted by Snooooopy

Originally posted by TruePisces
Thanks for the exact date. Now I know when I need to place that order for cyanide pills.

:: Sending lifetime supply of cyanide pills FedEx to Snooooopy to eliminate one rival for TruePisces' love::

Vra-Vra-Vrooooomm!!! I was raised in SC, where NASCAR was popular LONG before anybody outside the South ever heard of it!

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by UncleBill
:: Sending lifetime supply of cyanide pills FedEx to Snooooopy to eliminate one rival for TruePisces' love::

*looks at the slowly dwindling number of men around her (not that there were many to begin with)*
I think something funny is going on here...

Vra-Vra-Vrooooomm!!! I was raised in SC, where NASCAR was popular LONG before anybody outside the South ever heard of it!

Hah! That's what YOU think... Grew up in NY state, and I've been watching NASCAR since before I could talk! It's a family tradition! Another reason I MOVED to the south... more tracks within reach!

[UncleBill]

I KNEW I liked you!

I've not done Daytona or Atlanta yet, but Homestead, Darlington, and Charlotte are under my belt (insert innuendo here).

Oh, yeah, back on topic, you could use somethings in common with your suitor as well (NASCAR). And someone who has shared some experiences, oh, say, maybe like having lived in New York state, or something. Maybe someone who has great pride for country, and maybe even was in the service during conflicts, or maybe someone who enjoys riding in the wind through the Florida Keys. Hmmm..... where could you find a guy like that?

[Snooooopy]

[quote]Originally posted by UncleBill

Originally posted by Snooooopy

:: Sending lifetime supply of cyanide pills FedEx to Snooooopy to eliminate one rival for TruePisces' love::

Fed Ex ... when you absolutely, positively HAVE to kill someone overnight!

Might I ask, now that I'm thinking about it, how many pills might constitute a lifetime supply of cyanide pills?

[UncleBill]

Somebody gets it!

If you took them really REALLY fast, maybe a dozen would last you. Being a NASCAR dissenter, you probably do not like things very fast, so I only sent 4. Take with water when you hear "Gentlemen, Start......Your......ENGINES!". Do not attempt to operate heavy equipment while taking these pills, possible side effects include frothing at the mouth, loose bowels, and bleeding from the ears. No refund for unused portion of prescription.

[ultress]

Whatever you do, don't use the spark test. All that does is let you know the battery works, it takes more than the battery to run the car.

[Snooooopy]

Originally posted by UncleBill
Somebody gets it!

If you took them really REALLY fast, maybe a dozen would last you. Being a NASCAR dissenter, you probably do not like things very fast, so I only sent 4. Take with water when you hear "Gentlemen, Start......Your......ENGINES!".

I would like NASCAR if they made it like the old "Spy Hunter" video game -- machine guns, smoke screens, oil slicks, and the theme from "Peter Gunn" piped in over the public address system.

Do not attempt to operate heavy equipment while taking these pills, possible side effects include frothing at the mouth, loose bowels, and bleeding from the ears. No refund for unused portion of prescription.

Refund? Am I to understand that you're CHARGING me for the privilege of offing myself?

[UncleBill]

[quote]Originally posted by Snooooopy

I would like NASCAR if they made it like the old "Spy Hunter" video game -- machine guns, smoke screens, oil slicks, and the theme from "Peter Gunn" piped in over the public address system.

If FOX ever gets ahold of it for long it WILL be like that. XNASCAR.

Refund? Am I to understand that you're CHARGING me for the privilege of offing myself?

You were going to place an order anyway, I just provided the service! I'm considerate that way. Do you have an HMO card with a prescription rider? Then it would only be $5. Still, once the bottle is opened, the contents COULD be contaminated, and they might not work as advertised for the next vict-...., I mean patient.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by UncleBill
You were going to place an order anyway, I just provided the service! I'm considerate that way. Do you have an HMO card with a prescription rider? Then it would only be $5. Still, once the bottle is opened, the contents COULD be contaminated, and they might not work as advertised for the next vict-...., I mean patient.

Ok, who do I need to warn first? Do you have any idea how bad this will look on me? I'll be the Black Widow Doper!

[Snooooopy]

Originally posted by UncleBill
You were going to place an order anyway, I just provided the service! I'm considerate that way. Do you have an HMO card with a prescription rider? Then it would only be $5. Still, once the bottle is opened, the contents COULD be contaminated, and they might not work as advertised for the next vict-...., I mean patient.

Are these pills plain cyanide, orange-flavored or new FreshMint? Orange is my favorite.

[lurkernomore]

Originally posted by TruePisces

I'll be the Black Widow Doper!

Sounds like a sig to me....

[FallenAngel]

[quote]Originally posted by Snooooopy
[quote]I would like NASCAR if they made it like the old "Spy Hunter" video game -- machine guns, smoke screens, oil slicks, and the theme from "Peter Gunn" piped in over the public address system.


I have an easier way to make NASCAR interesting and enjoyable: Undivided two-way traffic.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by lurkernomore

Sounds like a sig to me....

But I'm... but I... I didn't...

*sigh* Ok. I'll do it.

UncleBill, you owe me for taking the rap for this one!!!

[iampunha]

Originally posted by handy
Car door test: Lock both doors, unlock her door, see if she then unlocks your door, if she does, great.

Great movie, A Bronx Story.

Or was it The Bronx Story?

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by UncleBill
I KNEW I liked you!

I've not done Daytona or Atlanta yet, but Homestead, Darlington, and Charlotte are under my belt (insert innuendo here).

Never managed to get to The Glen... but I've done Daytona, Charlotte, and Talladega. STILL want to get to Homestead, Richmond (where I have friends), Dover... never Pocono, worst track for spectators on the circuit. Actually, if I win the lottery (yeah, see THAT happening), my plan is to get tickets to every track and make every race in a season. Ideal!

Oh, yeah, back on topic, you could use somethings in common with your suitor as well (NASCAR). And someone who has shared some experiences, oh, say, maybe like having lived in New York state, or something. Maybe someone who has great pride for country, and maybe even was in the service during conflicts, or maybe someone who enjoys riding in the wind through the Florida Keys. Hmmm..... where could you find a guy like that?

Hmmm... who knows. Just where COULD I find a guy like that? Of course, with you around, any other options are going to disappear, anyway!

[lurkernomore]

Originally posted by Snooooopy

I would like NASCAR if they made it like the old "Spy Hunter" video game -- machine guns, smoke screens, oil slicks, and the theme from "Peter Gunn" piped in over the public address system.

How about, each lap they activate a different section fo the minefield....

[handy]

A lesson for the young women. WHen you kiss a guy for the first time, put your hands on his shoulders in front so that you can push him away if he kisses you more than you'd like.

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by lurkernomore

How about, each lap they activate a different section fo the minefield....

*shakes head* Don't you understand that with 43 cars going upwards of 150 miles an hour, it's just LIKE activating a different section of the minefield each lap... You just don't know which ones are duds!

Originally posted by handy
A lesson for the young women. WHen you kiss a guy for the first time, put your hands on his shoulders in front so that you can push him away if he kisses you more than you'd like.

Or pull him closer if he doesn't....

<slight hijack>
lurker, meeting went better than I'd feared, not as good as I'd hoped. 5-8 more months, as per their reckoning. I don't see how, but that's what they're telling me. I'll give you the details later (or sooner if hotmail ever decides to get off its duff and WORK)
</slight hijack>

[Snooooopy]

Originally posted by TruePisces

*shakes head* Don't you understand that with 43 cars going upwards of 150 miles an hour, it's just LIKE activating a different section of the minefield each lap... You just don't know which ones are duds!

The point is, we're not satisfied HOPING for people to crash and burn. We want GUARANTEES. Ideally, we'd like to look in the program and see an entry like, "2:15 p.m. -- One unlucky car blown to smithereens."

[UncleBill]

Originally posted by TruePisces

Or pull him closer if he doesn't....

I DO like your style!

Originally posted by TruePisces
Hmmm... who knows. Just where COULD I find a guy like that? Of course, with you around, any other options are going to disappear, anyway!

Back from Philly (two days too early to hit Dopefest there). As far as where you could meet a guy like that? At the other end of that mail button below this post!

[TruePisces]

Originally posted by Snooooopy
*shakes head* Don't you understand that with 43 cars going upwards of 150 miles an hour, it's just LIKE activating a different section of the minefield each lap... You just don't know which ones are duds!

The point is, we're not satisfied HOPING for people to crash and burn. We want GUARANTEES. Ideally, we'd like to look in the program and see an entry like, "2:15 p.m. -- One unlucky car blown to smithereens." [/b][/quote]

Try watching Bristol. You're guaranteed someone is going to crash hard there (usually several someones) It's just a matter of there, they can walk away.

Originally posted by UncleBill

I DO like your style! [/b]

Somehow, I had that figured out about you!