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  #1  
Old 09-05-2011, 01:58 PM
Stauderhorse Stauderhorse is offline
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So, uh, how do I deepthroat without gagging?

Really no delicate way to put this question, so...

When I'm giving my boyfriend a blowjob, there's still at least another couple of inches that don't fit in my mouth. I've tried putting my face at a 90-degree angle to his penis to make more room and open my throat, and that helps. I also notice that if I've had a drink or two, my gag reflex is a lot less sensitive. The problem is, I've always had a pretty sensitive gag reflex, maybe a little more sensitive than normal. Even when I went to my doctor's office as a kid and he used a tongue depressor, I couldn't stand it if it was anywhere near my throat. I also find it really difficult to swallow pills, and that may have something to do with it. Anyways, almost any time I try to take his whole penis in, I end up gagging or fighting off the urge to gag, which kind of kills the sexiness. He really loves it when I can fit more in, and I love giving him as much satisfaction as possible.

So, ladies (or men), advice? How do I train myself to ignore or lessen my gag reflex?
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  #2  
Old 09-05-2011, 02:10 PM
Silver Fire Silver Fire is offline
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I have a small mouth and a severely over-active gag reflex. I have to use a child's toothbrush and I throw up at the dentist. Even just my own spit sometimes triggers that nasty dry-heave, gaggy feeling. It's awful.

IME, there really isn't any way around it. I love oral but, seriously, I don't get much more than the head in my mouth on a consistent basis. I can overcome it in spurts so I can take more of him in for just a single pass, which is surprising and sexy for him in that way, but to truly deepthroat? Forget about it. Good thing I have hands and a tongue. No one has ever complained about it to me.
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  #3  
Old 09-05-2011, 02:14 PM
ZipperJJ ZipperJJ is offline
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When I was a kid I always had strep throat, and I spent a lot of time touching popsicles to my tonsils. I still do it today. I don't have much of a gag reflex at all.

Perhaps you could practice with popsicles?
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  #4  
Old 09-05-2011, 02:41 PM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is online now
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Deep-throating is vastly overrated, in my opinion. What you want to do is lightly grip and manipulate the base of the penis while going down of the rest of the penis. The twin sensations, after some practice, while stimulate your partner much more than throat action alone.
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  #5  
Old 09-05-2011, 02:42 PM
Emily Litella Emily Litella is offline
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How about if you wrap your fingers around the base of his penis and stroke it while using your mouth as much as you can? Even measure how far you can go down with the top finger before it makes you gag. Use saliva to lube your hand (or lube). Occasionally try to see if you can go a little further.
I never thought gagging and torturing myself was sexy anyway, and I haven't had any complaints with this method.

eta: What Czarcasm said...

Last edited by Emily Litella; 09-05-2011 at 02:43 PM..
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  #6  
Old 09-05-2011, 03:12 PM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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First, oral sex is more about the tongue than the lips, so if your tongue can reach an inch further than your lips, that counts.

And second . . . if my partner is to be believed, you have to be born without any gag reflex whatsoever.

If all else fails . . . find a partner who is "small."
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  #7  
Old 09-05-2011, 03:34 PM
sitchensis sitchensis is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Silver Fire View Post
I can overcome it in spurts

What a coincidence, when it spurts, it usually means I overcame


I think there are two different issues and if you ask you BF about he will probably agree.
1) Good blowjobs; All you really need is to be enthusiastic and have fun (itís not a chore). The best ones I have had never involved deep throating. All the good nerve endings are at the head.

2) Deep throating; satisfies a totally different kink, you may be able to satisfy this in different ways depending on why he likes it. If he likes the visual, than you could start with him soft, and give him the visual until his blood pressure catches up.

Thatís just my guess, talk to him
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  #8  
Old 09-05-2011, 04:16 PM
Little Nemo Little Nemo is offline
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Practice, practice, practice.

I don't know if it'll work but I doubt you'll hear any complaints.
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  #9  
Old 09-05-2011, 04:57 PM
Stauderhorse Stauderhorse is offline
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Originally Posted by sitchensis View Post
1) Good blowjobs; All you really need is to be enthusiastic and have fun (itís not a chore). The best ones I have had never involved deep throating. All the good nerve endings are at the head.
I definitely agree, I just really like his reactions whenever I take all of him in.
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  #10  
Old 09-05-2011, 05:02 PM
AskNott AskNott is offline
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If it's something you really want to do, the gag reflex can be overcome. You might be surprised at how many how-to articles can be found. You'd think those articles would be in women's magazines, and maybe some are, but the ones I've seen were in men's magazines. I'll summarize them for you.

If nothing else, it will help you when you have to take really big pills, and keep from gagging when your dental hygienist cleans your teeth.

First, understand the anatomy. Here's an illustration.
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/e...pages/1118.htm
When you swallow food, the epiglottis closes the trachea, so you don't get any oatmeal in your lungs. It also closes when you deepthroat, and the penis goes down the esophagus. In the diagram, everything looks too narrow, right? If you open your mouth and stick your tongue out, there's a lot of room. Look for yourself, in front of a mirror.

Understand that the gag is not so scary. Even if you throw up, it's not a big deal, and you'll learn to not gag.

Don't go right for the BF. Practice first with a soft, narrow dildo, or a frankfurter, and get used to having something in there, without the stress of lovemaking.

When you think you are ready for the real thing, talk about it with him. You need to trust him to not push on the back of your head, and understand that you're still working on the process. Tell him not to expect too much too soon. You're not going right to a porn star's ability in one night.

By the way, new research found that massaging the temples helps to overcome the gag reflex.

Be patient.
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  #11  
Old 09-05-2011, 05:03 PM
DiosaBellissima DiosaBellissima is offline
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Do you actually throw up when you gag?

See, that's the trick for me: I learned long ago that I may gag, but I don't throw up. Learning that helped me relax a bit- a gag here or there isn't going to kill me (and let's be honest here: some guys think that's hot). Plus, once you know you aren't going to ruin the moment by barfing everywhere, you can practice more, easing up the gag reflex over time.

And for everyone saying she should do the hand method and such- those are all important parts of a good blow job no doubt, but a well placed bob or two with the whole thing down the throat seems to be a rather enjoyable thing for most guys. Certainly, I wouldn't exclusively sit there jamming his entire dong down my throat for 10 minutes, but here and there it adds a certain something.
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  #12  
Old 09-05-2011, 05:18 PM
Stauderhorse Stauderhorse is offline
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Originally Posted by DiosaBellissima View Post
Do you actually throw up when you gag?
I don't throw up, but I will cough hard and stop to breathe for a second.
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  #13  
Old 09-05-2011, 06:12 PM
Chefguy Chefguy is offline
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Excuse me, I need to go see what the wife's up to.
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  #14  
Old 09-05-2011, 06:12 PM
ZenBeam ZenBeam is offline
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Originally Posted by AskNott View Post
Don't go right for the BF. Practice first with a soft, narrow dildo, or a frankfurter
Not a frankfurter. That seems like a risk for it breaking off leaving an inch or two, followed by choking.
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  #15  
Old 09-05-2011, 08:23 PM
Silver Fire Silver Fire is offline
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Originally Posted by sitchensis View Post
What a coincidence, when it spurts, it usually means I overcame
Ha, I didn't even notice the wording.
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  #16  
Old 09-05-2011, 08:32 PM
Poysyn Poysyn is offline
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I posed this question to Nina Hartley once - she agreed that most men don't care, it's over-rated. Use your hands, show some enthusiasm. Most of the strongest sensation is in the head anyway (from what I have been told).
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  #17  
Old 09-05-2011, 09:22 PM
Shawn K Shawn K is offline
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I've been told that sore throat sprays have a bit of anesthetic or something in them so that if you spray the back of your throat before you go down it'll kill the gag reflex, no idea if it's true though.
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  #18  
Old 09-05-2011, 10:47 PM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is online now
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I've been told that sore throat sprays have a bit of anesthetic or something in them so that if you spray the back of your throat before you go down it'll kill the gag reflex, no idea if it's true though.
It's not.
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  #19  
Old 09-05-2011, 11:50 PM
rhubarbarin rhubarbarin is offline
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You have to desensitize your gag reflex over time. If you don't like gagging, retching, and possibly inducing vomiting, this will be a pretty awful thing to do to yourself.

I'm in the same boat with the oversensitivity. But being able to deep throat is totally not worth sticking shit into my throat frequently until it stops bothering me so much...
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  #20  
Old 09-06-2011, 08:26 AM
Jophiel Jophiel is offline
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A woman I know once told me that her trick is to squeeze her thumb in her left fist. I tried it (using my finger) and I didn't gag but it wasn't especially pleasant, either.

I've no idea if there's a physiological reason for it or if it's just a "concentrating on this so you don't think about that" sort of thing. I suspect the latter but "works" is "works".
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  #21  
Old 09-06-2011, 10:19 AM
lindsaybluth lindsaybluth is offline
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Originally Posted by DiosaBellissima View Post
Certainly, I wouldn't exclusively sit there jamming his entire dong down my throat for 10 minutes,
Man, have I told you lately that I love you?
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  #22  
Old 09-06-2011, 10:26 AM
Dogzilla Dogzilla is offline
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Breathe through your nose. Concentrate on relaxing your throat muscles and if you feel slightly gaggy, pull back just a bit, work the head and then when you're back in control go back down deep again. Also, testicles are nature's way of saying, "put your other hand here."
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  #23  
Old 09-06-2011, 11:12 AM
Zsofia Zsofia is offline
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Deep-throating is vastly overrated, in my opinion. What you want to do is lightly grip and manipulate the base of the penis while going down of the rest of the penis. The twin sensations, after some practice, while stimulate your partner much more than throat action alone.
This, absolutely.

Or you could offer anal instead and he'll forget all about it.
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  #24  
Old 09-06-2011, 12:15 PM
AClockworkMelon AClockworkMelon is offline
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Or you could offer anal instead and he'll forget all about it.
On the nose.

The suggestion, I mean.
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  #25  
Old 09-06-2011, 01:06 PM
mr. jp mr. jp is offline
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I'm sure your boyfriend will like the answer: Practice.
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  #26  
Old 09-08-2011, 08:29 AM
Autolycus Autolycus is offline
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It helps get into it if you wear a Nixon mask.
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  #27  
Old 09-08-2011, 09:33 AM
corkboard corkboard is offline
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And if that doesn't work, have him wear it.
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  #28  
Old 09-08-2011, 09:35 AM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is online now
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And if that doesn't work, have him wear it.
And start calling his penis "Tricky Dick".
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  #29  
Old 09-08-2011, 10:36 AM
Enderw24 Enderw24 is offline
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If all else fails . . . find a partner who is "small."
This is why I only deep throat lepers. It becomes easier the more times I do it.
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  #30  
Old 09-08-2011, 11:36 AM
AskNott AskNott is offline
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Originally Posted by Dogzilla View Post
Breathe through your nose. Concentrate on relaxing your throat muscles and if you feel slightly gaggy, pull back just a bit, work the head and then when you're back in control go back down deep again. Also, testicles are nature's way of saying, "put your other hand here."
Keep in mind, you can't breathe and deepthroat at the same time. The epiglottis closes off the windpipe.
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  #31  
Old 09-08-2011, 05:26 PM
Little Bird Little Bird is offline
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Start brushing your tongue. You stick your tongue all the way out and open your mouth wide and brush as far back as you can. Get it nice and foamy with the toothpaste and then use a tongue scraper and scrape it off. Morning and night. You will desensitize, and if you gag or puke or whatever you are alone in the bathroom and it will all go into the sink, easy peasy.

Also, I find it easier to deep throat if I have the gentleman lay down and I position myself so my ass is up toward his head. That way the position of the penis matches the curve of my throat.

(PS, I super hate my TMJ problems because I fucking love giving head.)
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  #32  
Old 09-08-2011, 05:51 PM
JRDelirious JRDelirious is offline
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Originally Posted by ZenBeam View Post
Not a frankfurter. That seems like a risk for it breaking off leaving an inch or two, followed by choking.
Must agree - however limited, such risk is real. Always practice with something that you're sure you can pull out immediately w/o it breaking up.



And this is one of those things in which whether or not it is achieved, just knowing there was the intention will surely greatly please the intended audience...
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  #33  
Old 09-08-2011, 05:53 PM
purplehorseshoe purplehorseshoe is offline
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..Also, I find it easier to deep throat if I have the gentleman lay down and I position myself so my ass is up toward his head. That way the position of the penis matches the curve of my throat...
Isn't that just 69-ing without you getting any of the benefit?
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  #34  
Old 09-08-2011, 07:38 PM
Procrustus Procrustus is offline
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Isn't that just 69-ing without you getting any of the benefit?
She didn't rule that out
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  #35  
Old 09-08-2011, 08:56 PM
Little Bird Little Bird is offline
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Isn't that just 69-ing without you getting any of the benefit?
Well I'm not sitting on him, just to the side. Besides, I prefer we each get our own individually instead of having to concentrate on two things at once.
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  #36  
Old 09-08-2011, 09:03 PM
Count Blucher Count Blucher is offline
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Well I'm not sitting on him, just to the side. Besides, I prefer we each get our own individually instead of having to concentrate on two things at once.
Whole new meaning to "Keep your eyes on the Prize".
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  #37  
Old 09-08-2011, 09:27 PM
Chef Troy Chef Troy is offline
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You could also lie down and hang your head over the edge of the bed, while your fella stands. This will line your throat up for the sword-swallowing.

I agree with others that there's no magic shortcut to desensitizing your gag reflex. It can be done with patience and practice, though.
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  #38  
Old 09-08-2011, 09:33 PM
Rick Rick is online now
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Isn't that just 69-ing without you getting any of the benefit?
It's 68. She does him and he owes her one.
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  #39  
Old 09-08-2011, 09:48 PM
VOW VOW is offline
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This thread made me laugh so hard I puked!


~VOW
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  #40  
Old 09-09-2011, 08:45 AM
Krouget Krouget is offline
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It's 68. She does him and he owes her one.
Ok, this was just funny.
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  #41  
Old 09-09-2011, 08:57 AM
Mean Mr. Mustard Mean Mr. Mustard is online now
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It helps get into it if you wear a Nixon mask.
Nah, he could never get it down Pat.


mmm
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  #42  
Old 09-09-2011, 09:38 AM
Vinyl Turnip Vinyl Turnip is offline
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Must agree - however limited, such risk is real. Always practice with something that you're sure you can pull out immediately w/o it breaking up.
A bowling pin, for example. Tip: start with the smaller end.
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  #43  
Old 09-09-2011, 10:38 AM
Cartooniverse Cartooniverse is offline
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A bowling pin, for example. Tip: start with the smaller end.
Made me choke on a Nutter Butter !!!
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  #44  
Old 09-09-2011, 11:08 AM
corkboard corkboard is offline
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Also, I find it easier to deep throat if I have the gentleman lay down and I position myself so my ass is up toward his head. That way the position of the penis matches the curve of my throat.

(PS, I super hate my TMJ problems because I fucking love giving head.)
This is one of the hottest things I have read on this board.
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  #45  
Old 09-09-2011, 11:21 AM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is online now
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Green bananas of various sizes are good for practicing on. Remember to trim the tip of the banana of stem.
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  #46  
Old 09-09-2011, 11:53 AM
Malacandra Malacandra is offline
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Originally Posted by Zsofia View Post
This, absolutely.

Or you could offer anal instead and he'll forget all about it.
Many people, however, find it easier to open their mouth than their asshole.
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  #47  
Old 09-09-2011, 06:03 PM
Zsofia Zsofia is offline
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Yeah, but she's not asking about opening her mouth.
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  #48  
Old 09-09-2011, 08:02 PM
Nzinga, Seated Nzinga, Seated is offline
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Made me choke on a Nutter Butter !!!
The trick is to relax your throat a bit.
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  #49  
Old 09-09-2011, 09:51 PM
Maiira Maiira is offline
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For me, it just took practice, and relaxation. I would put the penis in as far in as I dared and just hold it there for a few seconds (or until I felt the gag reflex coming on). The more I did it, the better I got at it, and the deeper I could go. I'm still not doing it as easily as a porn star does, but I'm improving.

Another plus: gagging (a LITTLE gagging) produces more saliva, which means more lube (or you can find a flavored lube you like). It's messy as hell, but worth it (and if you don't want a wet spot, just throw a towel or two down).

Also, it should be said that there IS more to deepthroating than just getting the whole penis in one's mouth. The throat is a bit more constricted than the mouth, and that constriction on the head of the penis = decent stimulation.
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  #50  
Old 09-10-2011, 02:52 AM
panache45 panache45 is offline
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Originally Posted by Little Bird View Post
Also, I find it easier to deep throat if I have the gentleman lay down and I position myself so my ass is up toward his head. That way the position of the penis matches the curve of my throat.
Except that most of the penis' nerve endings are on the under side, so your tongue will be stimulating the wrong side.

Also, different penises curve in different directions . . . or not at all.
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