Have people turned to you for help on things you know nothing about?

[Koxinga]

My brother used to ask me for help on his Latin homework. I never took a lick of Latin. But somehow I was usually able to figure out what was going on.

A friend of mine turned to me for help on an essay on one of Shakespeare's Henry plays. Never read it. Some dude in there named "Hotspur," but can't tell you who it was, really. Still, I think I helped her fake it pretty well.

In Taiwan I've occasionally been asked to help figure out legal contracts. Needless to say . . .

How 'bout you?

[Kimballkid]

Are you asking in a general sense or are you asking if I know nothing about the topic but were able to help anyway? I've been asked to help on many things I know nothing about and had to decline because I didn't know thing one about them, but I don't think that's what you are asking here.

[Koxinga]

Able to help anyway (or at least pretend to do so).

[Queen Tonya]

The other day in the produce section of the grocery store, a stranger asked me about what foods she should buy for a diabetic. Something like, her friend is diabetic and going on a trip and what food could be taken along for them.

I don't have diabetes, no one in my family does, but I gave her the best advice I could figure about low glycemic index stuff and protein based snacks. Why she decided to ask me instead of any other random stranger is a mystery.

[hogarth]

While at work (at a bank), my boss's boss's boss's secretary asked me to figure out the meaning of some symbols for the boss's boss's boss's wife. She gave me some photocopied pages from a book and I googled the answer. It was a nice change of pace from my normal work.

[kayaker]

I often carry my iPad with me when I go to a bar. It is pretty common for someone to say, "Hey, kayaker. . .who is that actress that was in that movie. . ?".

A few seconds on my iPad and I tell them the answer.

[Hershele Ostropoler]

Asked for directions* in Paris (where I don't live) in French (which I don't speak).

*presumably

[Noelq]

All the time. I work in IT, and I know computers. Evidently, this means I know how to:
1. Repair all copy machines.
2. Diagnose cable issues.
3. Fix Google.
4. Secretly know how to install all the computer programs, ever, for free.
5. Reprogram a DVR.
6. Reassemble an I-phone.
7. Program web applications in Java, Flash, C+, Linux, etc.,
8. Can read circuit boards just like a book.

Really what I can do? Find the "Help" menu, or search on Google.

[Dogzilla]

People come to me with medical problems. Although I'm Red Cross certified in first aid and CPR, I have no medical training at all. None.

I teach fitness at a dance studio (in addition to my day job as an editor). I see students do this to the other instructors and they do it to me sometimes: they come to us with injuries and medical issues and ask us what to do. "My ankle hurts!" "Could you look at this bruise? What should I do?" None of us are technically even qualified (with paper certifications anyway) to teach what we're teaching, nevermind none of us are physical therapists, or nurses, or doctors, or orthopedic specialists, or even have any training in sports medicine or anything. My friend has a martial arts school and his students do the same thing to him.

I will give first aid advice and also emphasize about four times to also go see an actual, qualified, medical professional. No, I have no idea if you can do this activity or that in your first trimester. Try asking your doctor. Note: In my observations, I have noticed that the answer, regardless of who is being asked, generally begins with, "Well, I'm not a doctor and you should see one if this is really bothering you..." My answers end with, "But first aid for a pulled muscle is Rest, Ice, Compression, and Elevation. I can wrap that up for you, but you should see your doctor."

[garygnu]

I have a reputation for knowing everything. Fortunately for me, I have a pretty good ability to figure things out, and for making educated guesses that turn out correct

My wife is the go-to girl at her work for all knowledge, too. She's usually able to fix the problem or answer the question. When she can't, she calls me (and if I don't know, I Google).

[Missy2U]

All the time. I have some good Google-fu, I guess. Usually it's at bars - our friends tend to have really cool smart phones with internet access that they don't know how to use. I have an old flip LG phone from Virgin Mobile with internet that I can make work in most cases. Plus - they all leave their glasses in their cars so they couldn't read their phones even if they knew how to use them.

[astorian]

I'm a trivia buff, and a bit of a showoff. As a result, I'm often the first one friends and relatives call when they're trying to come up with the answer to assorted question.

About half the time, I have NO clue... which is more embarrassing than it should be.

[Grestarian]

This is such a great corollary to the What are the bizarre things people say to you when you tell them what you do for a living? thread

I used to be in charge of the concessions (food and drink sales) for a movie theater. The theater uniform was black shoes, pants, vest, and tie with a white shirt. As the supervisor, I wore a gray vest and pants instead of black. After finishing up late at night, I'd stop off at a grocery store to grab dinner on the way home. Quite often, other customers would approach me and ask where they could find a product. [It's amazing how people assume you're some kind of authority if you dress more formally than the norm.] Since I knew the store well, I could usually tell them how many aisles over they should go.

Then some of the other late-night regulars tried asking me to help with a return.

"I'm sorry, I can't do that."
"Well, don't you work here?"
"Nope. Never have."
"You mean you're not a manager?"
"No, I just act like one at the movies."

And then I happened to be at a hardware store, in-uniform, because I was on the clock and had been sent from the theater by my manager to find some extra bolts for our falling-apart popcorn machine. I was walking out the door when some guy was walking in. He stopped me and said, "Can you help me with some plywood?" So I walked with him (Okay, so I led the way because I knew the store well) to the lumber section and even went through the panels to help him pick out a nice one with relatively few knot-holes on either surface. Then he said, "Can you cut it for me?"

"Oh, no." I replied as I walked away, "You'll need to find an employee for that." And then, to confuse the world even more, I walked up to a manager of the place and said, "Uh, Customer Assistance needed at the panel cutter."

--G!

Well the weekend at the college
Didn't turn out like you planned
The things you think are knowledge
I can't understand
. -- Fagen & Becker (Steely Dan)
. Reelin' in the Years
. Can't Buy a Thrill

[Lust4Life]

Originally Posted by Queen Tonya

The other day in the produce section of the grocery store, a stranger asked me about what foods she should buy for a diabetic. Something like, her friend is diabetic and going on a trip and what food could be taken along for them.

I don't have diabetes, no one in my family does, but I gave her the best advice I could figure about low glycemic index stuff and protein based snacks. Why she decided to ask me instead of any other random stranger is a mystery.

Wear anything looking like a uniform in a store and your guarenteed to get somebody ask for your help.

[Chefguy]

It used to happen a lot to me in the military, where I was an electrician. "Can you fix my television?" "Can you figure out what's wrong with my car's electrical?" Well, no to both, as I'm not a) an electronics technician, nor b) an automotive electrician. It's not that I knew nothing about those things (such as the theory behind them), but would only make things worse by mucking around with them.

[Martian Bigfoot]

Jesus Christ. I've worked as reference librarian. Nuff said.

[jackdavinci]

My friend had me help him do a 3D animation project for school using software I'd never heard of on a computer I'm not used to. I guess because it's very vague related to graphic design. I basically ended up doing the whole thing and he said it was the only reason he passed the class.

And I've been mistaken for someone who works at a store many times. But I'll try to help if I'm able.

[leahcim]

I've replaced a car battery for someone solely on the "look at the old one and try to put the new one in the same way" principle.

[Philster]

Ever since Linked-In came to be, my profession has been listed as a Ferrari engineer, and then a Ferrari "aftercare specialist". I think it's over 10 years now. Anyway, I have a network of people who work at Ferrari, or have worked at Ferrari, some who own Ferraris or are involved in maintenance and repair of Ferraris.

So, I've fielded a number of questions ranging from how to start an old Ferrari engine to one about a wing/spoiler.

Good times.

.

[Dogzilla]

Originally Posted by Lust4Life

Wear anything looking like a uniform in a store and your guarenteed to get somebody ask for your help.

If you are wearing khaki pants and/or a red shirt in Target, I will ask you for help.

Sorry.

[Corcaigh]

Before I learned to drive, I'd frequently get people pulling over in their cars to ask for directions. I'd know how to walk there, but not how to get there in a car, so that would cause some problems.

I used to regularly tell people to "go right, down at the end of the road there" and later (when learning to drive) discovered that there was a 'No Entry' sign and you couldn't turn right at the end of the road there.

I can't get into trouble for that, can I??

[Lsura]

I apparently project LIBRARIAN at all times. I can be walking down the street in a strange city and be asked for restaurant recommendations. I get asked stuff in grocery stores and places like Target all the time.

Most of the time I don't mind, but there are the days I just want to glare at them all.

[Zsofia]

I'm a public librarian, so it's sort of my job.

[Ludovic]

Got asked for directions in Central Park, but to be fair I was trying to look like a stereotypical New Yorker -- i.e. black peacoat and black cap.

In the Rocket Garden at Kennedy Space Center, someone randomly asked me to name the city in Alabama that was also famous for its space connections. It took me a few seconds to jog my memory that it was Huntsville, but my memory got jogged faster than his did.

[Ludovic]

Originally Posted by Zsofia

I'm a public librarian, so it's sort of my job.

My brother's been a reference librarian a few times and is mildly annoyed/amused* when someone asks him a semi-obscure question that he totally knows of the top of his head, but then he has to go dig out a cite for.

*Dammit, "bemused" should mean mildly annoyed yet simultaneously somewhat amused, cause there's no other concise phrase that means that.

[silenus]

Originally Posted by astorian

I'm a trivia buff, and a bit of a showoff. As a result, I'm often the first one friends and relatives call when they're trying to come up with the answer to assorted question.

About half the time, I have NO clue... which is more embarrassing than it should be.

Same here, except for the last part.

Luckily, I have a wife who is a fuck-ton smarter than I am, so I just ask her for the answer when I don't know it.

[Digital is the new Analog]

Tonight, at the store attached to my regular bar, I was asked by a random customer how much a few items costs.

To be fair, I was in the back room with some friends. There is an unused bar there, and to make the conversation flow easy, I was standing behind the bar while my friends were on the other side. So it _looked_ like I worked there.

I actually sold a few things - handed them to the customers and told them to go to the other bar to pay. The owner stopped by to thank me.


-D/a

[gotpasswords]

I used to get asked all sorts of questions when I was at the Walgreens near my office, despite not wearing a blue smock or a name tag. Never did understand that.

Noelq - stop giving away our secrets!

[Senegoid]

Originally Posted by Martian Bigfoot

Jesus Christ. I've worked as reference librarian. Nuff said.

From time to time, I've entertained myself by asking really off-the-wall questions of reference librarians.

Turns out, I was stupefied at how often they actually knew the off-the-wall answers. Or, more precisely, how often they immediately knew exactly where there was a book with the answer, which they would then lead me to.

[Arabella Flynn]

Constantly. I apparently have a reputation for knowing everything. I don't, but I do know where to look everything up. For most people this is the difference between omniscience and access to a giant Book of All Knowledge written in a language they can't read -- which is to say, pretty much none.

Often they don't believe me when I say I don't know anything about something. This seems to be a difference in definition. They think I 'know something' if I know enough to figure out where to get more, and I think I 'know something' if I can hold a conversation with an expert or an enthusiastic hobbyist without embarrassing myself. There's also 'know something' versus 'is any good at using what I know'. I know plenty about photography, but I'm a lousy photographer, to the point where it takes me multiple tries to get a photo that contains 50% or more of a mostly-in-focus pet to post on the internet.

If asked to fix something I don't know much about, I tell people that I will gladly take it apart and have a look if and only if it's already so broken as to be unusable as it is. I have basic electric/electronics repair skills, but I'm not taking a chance on munging up something that isn't already at the "throw it out and get a new one" stage.

[Seanette]

Originally Posted by Lust4Life

Wear anything looking like a uniform in a store and your guarenteed to get somebody ask for your help.

You don't necessarily have to be dressed like the staff, either. I've been approached for help in stores when I had a shopping basket in my hands, a purse over my shoulder, and headphones visibly in use, while not even wearing any color that store's employees would wear.

[Seanette]

Originally Posted by Dogzilla

If you are wearing khaki pants and/or a red shirt in Target, I will ask you for help.

Sorry.

You'll probably have better odds of getting useful help if you ask someone wearing a nametag.

[Silver Tyger]

Originally Posted by Dogzilla

If you are wearing khaki pants and/or a red shirt in Target, I will ask you for help.

Sorry.

See that sort of makes sense.

The time I was asked for where something was in Walmart while I was wearing jeans and an orange paisley blouse? No idea. And then he got snippy when I said 'do I look like I work here?' Dumbass.

Back on topic. I'm an admin assistant; I get asked to do everything. And my mom expects me to be tech support because I'm less grumpy about it than my dad.

[BigT]

That's essentially always what happens with anyone who asks me about a computer problem, despite the fact that I sorta make a living off of fixing computers. I think it's a requirement in that line of work, since most people are so bad at explaining what the problem actually is.

[Jackmannii]

I am always being asked for directions. Apparently I look like I know where I'm going.

The worst recently was when I was assigned to a new hospital, wandering around the lobby when an elderly lady limped up to me wanting to know where Interventional Parasite Removal (or some such) was located. Since I was in scrubs, I don't think she bought my explanation that I didn't have the foggiest idea.

[olivesmarch4th]

For some reason older people ask me to fix their computer issues. I probably know as much, if not slightly less, about computers than the average person my age (29.) I usually do end up figuring it out, though, because a lot of fixing computer problems is trial and error.

[flodnak]

I'm an English teacher who has become known as someone who "knows stuff about computers" among my fellow teachers. So yes, they come to me with questions. Sometimes it's easy. but often it's way way beyond my fairly low level of expertise. Then I send them to our IT department, which is staffed by two geniuses who get paid for knowing this stuff... and some student apprentices who need to learn these things if they don't know it already.

[RealityChuck]

I work in computer support and am always being asked about software I've never seen or how to do something in Word that I barely realized you could do. Google is essential.

[Eliahna]

A fellow customer asked me where to find something in the supermarket recently on the basis that I was a female and we generally knew where to find everything. I did nothing to dispel that notion when I directed him to the correct aisle (and it wasn't even my regular supermarket!).

I am always asked for directions, the time, help locating products and weird random things, like the shopping centre (mall) security guy who asked me to help him set up his new phone for no apparent reason.