I pit your weak-written, gag-worthy, soft-hitting, watered-down pit threads, but not just those, I also pit your less-than-lame ones you’ve managed to resurrect from five, eight, ten, twelve years ago, and managed to make them as lame as you are.
Thank you, gentle “rage” warrior, for sharing your pent-up non-rage against apples. Or pitting “yourself” for having an affair. Boo-fuckin’-hoo. Please take your soft, weak, self-loathing elsewhere. It’s not entertaining me, which is your sole purpose of posting it anywhere I can read it. Didn’t you get the memo?
And nobody effing cares that you would like to correct a minor point someone made when Bush Jr. was still in office, because the rest of the world has moved on with their lives, lost fortunes in the stock market, got their house foreclosed on, and had a couple of kids who are now in elementary school. But you, oh ho ho no, you’ve got to bring up a conversation from back then that no one cares about, and not only that, it’s boring **legal **crap on top of everything else. And this isn’t the interesting, hot-titted legal shit, like abortion or the legality of sex change operations for criminals paid by the tax payer, no… this is zoning law.
Why are you crapping up my Pit with your 8 year old correction to a thread about zoning law? *Please *go get some ass, I AM BEGGING YOU.
Thank you, senior administrator of turd mining, who turns threads started by banned trolls from six years ago into gigantic shit zombies. Why? Is it to add something worth reading to a conversation that was never worth reading to begin with? Something funny, or insulting and flaming, perhaps? Or is it just because you’ve been timidly waiting six years to come out to the Straight Dope as a casual racist, and you think since the gays are getting married, we’ll be more accepting of your choice of lifestyle, which is to be a vaguely supremacist jackass?
Sorry to disappoint. The museum of tolerance doesn’t include racists as a protected category, bubeleh. Why did you drag this back to the top of the front page where I have to smell it? Why can’t you be at least mildly amusing while you’re revealing your brainal region to be as numb as your nutsack? Fuck that limp-wristed racism. At least call them darkies or something so you can get banned faster and I don’t have to read your uninspired verbal diarrhea. You’re not “edgy” because you one day decided you didn’t like black people, and decided they were all dumber and poorer than you. This is how you get comedians like Larry the Cable guy. Fart, Fart, Went to Florida- Caught a Cuban, Fart, Oak Ridge Boys with Titties. Asians are good at math! Wow aren’t I funny.
And this person right here, might as well be personally continuing a conversation that once happened between Benjamin Franklin and Thomas Jefferson. The last utterance happened THIRTEEN FUCKING YEARS AGO and the first breath of life breathed back into this thread was “Right there with you!”.
Right *WHERE? *Partying like it’s 1999?
What took you so long? Are you surfing the internet via carrier pigeon, are you posting messages onto the net via letters in a bottle floating through the sea, or is your mind so slow on the uptake that this is your real-time reply? Who in the blue-tainted fuck are you still talking to? I bet you half of the folks you’re conversing with left the Dope boards years ago. If you want to talk to them, why don’t you go play fetch?
And here’s a random and entirely gratuitous cheap shot, AnaMen. (Or is it Analmen? It might be more fitting…) Your** bicycle-related** pit thread took me on a short, boring journey up a barely lubricated butt canal. Your thread loudly sucked on rough scaly unwashed crocodile dick, and I truly do mean that sincerely. And that was not your only contribution to the ever-growing pile of snore-out-loud boring pit threads we’ve seen lately. Bicycles on the sidewalk instead of in the middle of traffic annoy you? Yawn. People who hate dumb people annoy you? :rolleyes:
Your pit threads read like A Treatise on Observation Of The Intricate And Delicate Mechanics Of Motion Between The Subjects Of The Elderly And Their Geriatric Fornication, or in other words, “watching old people fuck”.
Thank you for joining the Straight Dope apparently **just to thank **someone eight years ago for having a bladder infection. That was worth bumping the thread for. I hope it spreads to your brain so we don’t have to watch you smile through any more agony. May sweet, merciful brain death take away your suffering.
And if we could get some trolls in here who can do more than “Hitlery sucks! Ban me! I want to delete my account because I’m a lame, uninspired jackoff, the kind horror stories are told about between married men in hushed tones- Like when my wife offered me a handjob the other night, but she was tired, and I was drunk, and I couldn’t get it up, and there was no lube, and she had just brushed her teeth and she didn’t want to use her mouth, and there was no music playing, and it hurt for about five minutes before she finally gave up, THAT’S how much of a boring and uninspired jackoff I am!” THAT WOULD BE FAN-FU@#-TASTIC.
I haven’t been more bored by a wannabe troll since I played Dungeons and Dragons with Hellen Keller. And at least she had tits. Please go ban yourself IRL.
