Could you be a moderator here?

This Year’s Model, there was a small problem with your application-on page 33(side B) you neglected to answer question #816. Also, the instructions clearly stated that you were to “bring a virgin goat(emphasis mine)”. Please contact the Administrators ASAP.

You mean I’d have to go to Chicago…again?! I’ve done it once, it was windy and I got lake in my hair…

It helps, son. It helps.

The question is “Can you moderate sober?”

Could I? Yeah. Would I? No.

I’d much rather play in the sandbox once in a while than have to sift thru daily and remove all the nasties. Plus I don’t like goats all that much.

Here? Feh. That’d be like a walk in the park followed by 40’s and oral sex. I was a moderator on a survivalist board. It was amazing how such a relatively homogeneous group could disagree so venomously on so many topics.
Despite the fond dreams some have that they are persecuted here for their beliefs, the membership of this board is overwhelmingly sane, polite, and centrist.
Would I do it? No. I disagree with the way moderators operate here. i.e. They act as members one moment and then slip into moderator role the next. Particularly in Pit threads, it doesn’t seem right to me to have someone in a position of “authority” also taking part in pile-ons.

Fuck no. Fuck. No.

For about 3/4 of a semester in undergrad I was an RA. I basically did it for the money.

I hate having authority. Authority sucks. I hate having to be the one to enforce the rules. As I hinted above, my junior year in undergrad, one of our RAs on my floor had to take a leave of absence because of a family crisis. I thought she was pretty cool (OK, I wanted her carnally), and we got along. For whatever reason, she asked me to take her place, and the Dean of Housing took her recommendation. Figuring I’d be doing some good and making some much-needed cash, I accepted.

People who used to like me instantly hated me. Shit, after having to assume the role of enforcer on a couple of unpleasant occasions, I hated myself. Sanctioning people for doing things I honestly didn’t give a crap about, thinking all the while that some of the rules were overly restrictive and/or idiotic, left me in a state of considerable turmoil. By the end of the semester, I’d had quite enough of being a professional narc and all-around toady to the administration, half of whom I discovered I couldn’t stand. I was so disgusted and demoralized I took a semester abroad in Ireland just to get the fuck away from it all.

Hell fucking fuck no with a giant exclamation point. Not that anyone would ever ask me in a billion years, given my generally shitty attitude…but no.

With apologies to Tolkein and Peter Jackson…

Me? A moderator? I do not deny that my heart has greatly desired this. In place of a Dark Mod you would have a King. Not dark but beautiful and terrible as the Morning. Treacherous as the Sea. Stronger than the foundations of the earth.
ALL SHALL LOVE ME AND DESPAIR!!!
I pass the test. I will renew, and go into the pit, and remain Harborwolf.

I could, and I offered back during the Tubadiva kerfuffle, as my way of lighting a candle rather than cursing the darkness. Unfortunately, I was getting ready to move, start a new job, and take the Internal Medicine boards, so it couldn’t have been a worse time. (Plus, they told me my goat was inadequate. I’m not really sure what they meant by that, and I’m sure I don’t want to know.)

Now that things have slowed down, my hat is still in the ring, in case they ever need me.

The thought occurs that perhaps all mods must reside in the United States because of legal concerns — libel and copyright, for instance. If I were a mod and I allowed a statement to stand that is libelous in Canada but not the United States, could the Chicago Reader be sued through me because as a mod I’m an agent of the Reader?

They don’t. Coldfire didn’t, and Xash doesn’t.