How long is the average penis?

[Martiju]

My penis about 5 inches, and ballpoint.

huh?

[Mangetout]

My penis mightier than the sword.

[Revtim]

You need a fishing license to take a sperm sample out of mine.

[Uncommon_Sense]

My penis my sword.

[Thirty-Nine]

Has anyone got a reliable median length? This is one of these things where you want to know if you’re in the ‘longer’ or ‘shorter’ half

Not that I have any doubt whatsoever.

[flight]

@Washoe

Ah, you’ve come to the right place, as I just happen to be sort of an armchair expert on the subject. Not only did I recently start a very similar thread on the subject, in true Doper fashion I went and thoroughly investigated the matter myself and parlayed it into a semester project for an honors statistics course that I was taking at the time. Unfortunately, I can’t post the report here because the statistical symbols and tables won’t appear properly. If anybody wants a copy of the project, just e-mail me and I’ll send it to you. Make the header real obvious, so I don’t discard with the rest of my junk mail. (Or is there anyplace where I can post a 1 gig Word document where it can be made publicly accessible, à la one of those photobucket-like jpeg hosts)?

The bottom line is that there is no definitive answer to this question at this time. Results from different studies have yielded inconsistent results. The closest definitive answer that can be given is that the mean length of a Caucasian penis is somewhere between 5.000 and 6.250 inches, and the standard deviation is most likely between .750 and .825 inches.

Make it a pdf.

[Duke_of_Rat]

Is it a show-er or a grower?

[Flander]

I choked Linda Lovelace.

[The_Master_Killer]

My dick is so big it has a lobby and elevators…

My penis is so big it has mile markers and rest areas…

My dick is so big it wears two watches, one for each time zone its in…

My dick is so big, its head is always covered in snow…

My dick is so big it has smaller dicks orbiting around it…

My dick’s dick is bigger than yours…

[Jpeg_Jones]

Who was it who said, “Yeah, I’ve got ten inches. If I measure from my asshole!”?

[roger_thornhill]

@Thirty-Nine

Not that I have any doubt whatsoever.

The clue’s in your user name, right? Inches, I take it. Or have you gone metric?

[Chronos]

Make the header real obvious, so I don’t discard with the rest of my junk mail.

Right, so we should make the subject line “Penis size SCIENTIFIC RESULTS!”, right?

And I find intriguing that the variation is estimates of the mean is larger than the estimate of the true standard deviation. So the amount of lying is apparently greater than the amount of true variation.

[ouryL]

Monty Python Sketch:
(Lost at sea in lifeboat)

[One man]How long is it been?
[Other man]Isn’t that a rather personal question?

[Snickers]

“Cold.”

“And deep, too.”

[Washoe]

@Chronos

And I find intriguing that the variation is estimates of the mean is larger than the estimate of the true standard deviation. So the amount of lying is apparently greater than the amount of true variation.

Yes, that was exactly the conclusion that I came up with. As a matter of fact, my project was not an effort to determine the mean size of the human penis, but an effort to determine whether men tend to lie about the size of their penis. And answer is (not surprisingly), that they do. Here are the paragraphs from the project which address this:

Ho is rejected: there is sufficient evidence at alpha = (.05) to support the conclusion that self-reported measurements of penis size exceed clinically controlled measurements. At a P-value of 7.91E-12, it is virtually impossible that these results occurred by random chance.

I would imagine that most adults would not be surprised at the results of this analysis. However, the degree of exaggeration is probably not as pronounced as most people would believe. If the mean of the Kinsey data were reduced by .250 inches, the resultant z score would be (-1.6802), and under these circumstances the null hypothesis would not be rejected at a lesser but typical level of significance such as alpha = (.01). A reasonable explanation of the larger value of the Kinsey mean is that a substantial percentage of self-reported data is rounded up to the next half inch. On the other hand, it has been pointed out by some that the Ansell data is questionable, and may represent a sample biased towards a higher mean than exists in the general population. Since the respondents were culled from a voluntary selection of bar patrons, it has been suggested that only the ‘better endowed’ patrons were willing to lend themselves for measurement, particularly given the presence of female nurses. A study consisting of 80 subjects conducted by Wessells et al. (3) at the University of California School of Medicine, San Francisco yielded a mean penile length of 5.0787 inches, lending support to the contention that the Ansell data is biased. If the UCSF data is a truer representation of the actual mean of the general population, then the Kinsey data is in all probability substantially exaggerated.

[BubbaDog]

@Snickers

“Cold.”

“And deep, too.”

“And there’s a burr in the plumbing”

“You mean the burr in the wall or the burr in the basement”

" I mean the one down by the river"

Had to finish the joke

[Plynck]

@Washoe

Yes, that was exactly the conclusion that I came up with. As a matter of fact, my project was not an effort to determine the mean size of the human penis, but an effort to determine whether men tend to lie about the size of their penis. And answer is (not surprisingly), that they do. Here are the paragraphs from the project which address this:

*…there is sufficient evidence at alpha = (.05) to support the conclusion that self-reported measurements of penis size exceed clinically controlled measurements. *

The use of the word “clinically” implies that you might have been using a cold ruler. I would suggest clinical scientists in white lab coats measuring the control group, and Hooters waitresses measuring the test subjects.

[pinkfreud]

How long is the average penis?

According to my friends who are single and active, the answer is about ten minutes, unfortunately.

[Washoe]

@flight

Make it a pdf.

I tried, but for some reason it won’t print properly to the Acrobat Distiller. The size of the Word document is 896 KB.

[fifty-six]

A girl once asked apon seeing my manhood, “Who are you gonna please with that?”

I replied as usual, “Myself, of course.”