Snookie’s whoohaww has never been so clean. And I, for one, approve of this Situation.
It’s all fun and games until some frat boy starts sharting Jagermeister.
Not that I have done this, but if you used a tampon with a plastic applicator, it could be dipped into the booze while still in the applicator and soak some up without losing its shape, and then simply be inserted as per usual?
It would be pretty hard to get dry tampon far enough up to get a douche nozzle in to soak from below, and pretty damn hard to get a douche nozzle up past the tampon to soak from above. Besides, if you’re going to do a vodka douche, then why bother with the tampon? Not that the practical issues are anywhere the top of the list of reasons this is a bad idea, mind you.
A fresh tampon in the applicator is highly compressed, and could not expand to hold very much vodka. The total volume of the applicator can’t be much more than a couple of table spoons, not nearly enough to cause any kind of booze buzz.
This is getting to a rule 34 level.
Because the tampon would hold a lot more vodka for eventual absorbtion than a naked vagina, which would simply drain out when standing.
Perhaps you should lie down on your back with your feet in the air, fill 'er up using a douche nozzle, and THEN insert the tampon?
This natually leads us to another question for the sake of science, why stop at the vagina?! If it were at all practical, assuming you could pry past the cervix, how much booze could the average uterus hold? (assuming there are no fetuses in there.)
And does this give new meaning to the term Bloody Mary?
And yet, when an example of Rule 34 presents itself, it’s always just as shocking, every time.
My understanding is that the unoccupied uterus is about the size of your fist.
I love how this deteriorated from “This obviously stupid thing cannot be true, right?” To “But seriously - how can I get as much liquor in my vagina as possible?”
But can expand to baby-size!
You should be able to pump at least a good fifth of tequila in there, perhaps even a liter. Go wild, ladies!
This thread is not complete without a mention of Mayan enema practices. In other words, butt-chugging isn’t really new.
There really is no substitute for the SDMB. And you can put that in your . . . umm, never mind.
I would think the alcohol would make it burn like crazy.
Seconded, or fifthed, or whatever. There are very few things that are so stupid that not even one person has tried them, but the reason these stories are written and distributed nationally is that this is supposed to be a trend, not a thing one or two morons tried at some point. There’s a new one of these every couple of years. I remember a furor about “lipstick parties” in the last decade. Coincidentally I think there was a (fiction) book coming out on the subject at the time. :rolleyes: People will do some very stupid shit to get as drunk as they can, but come on. I’m not sure which part is harder to believe - girls soaking tampons in vodka or frat boys (stereotypically homophobic) sticking tubes up their butts. The fact that one cop or doctor says it’s real doesn’t mean much to me either- I hear tell that law enforcement swore hippies were eating babies in the '60s.
I believe the main idea behind this is so you can get your drunk on without anyone smelling it on you.
This is, of course, not possible because of how the body metabolizes alcohol.
Once alcohol is in the blood stream, the blood travels to the lungs and you effectively exhale alcohol vapor. It doesn’t matter how the alcohol got into your blood. You could inject alcohol directly into a vein and still fail a brethalyzer - no different than had you swallowed it.
The secondary idea would be that you could get your drunk on with a much smaller amount and faster than ingesting it. Out bodies do a pretty good job of filtering out small levels of toxins we swallow.
I don’t know, but there was a lunch seminar at work a couple weeks ago that stated it is occurring. This was given by people from the school including a police officer. How real is it? Just how common is it? Don’t know.
Maybe being on a first name basis was meant to indicate knows well enough to ask about the practice? Oh, I see he clarified just assessing their brain power.
This appears to be one presumption, but as has been stated, it is false. Much of the alcohol breath comes not from the ingestion through the mouth, but from the exhalation of alcohol as it is metabolized through the lungs. That’s why a breathalyzer works, and why if you try to mask it they wait 15 minutes. Something in your mouth will be gone, but something in the bloodstream is still being released via the lungs.
That was my suggestion!
But it takes months of metabolic changes to do that expansion, so it’s not a balloon that can be blown up on the spot.