)Wrong thinking is punished, right thinking is just as swiftly rewarded. You’ll find it an effective combination.
College isn’t all it was cracked up to be, and it probably didn’t prepare you for life the way you thought it would.
And that 30K you racked up in school loans won’t help start you out on the right foot either (especially if who you intend to marry is bringing his own 30K of debt to the pot too).
Rather, I was in the position of a spore which, having finally accepted its destiny as a fungus, still wonders if it might produce penicillin.
–Ayi Kwei Armah
Mistakes aren’t permanent; they’re the way you learn. Expect 'em.
People really aren’t watching you with all that much interest/judgment.
When in doubt–which will be most of the time–err on the side of kindness.
You get back just about what you give.
There really AIN’T no free lunch–but there are numerous signs of grace. Know the difference.
You can’t live someone else’s life; change 'em, “make them happy”, etc.
Enjoy each day. Most times, the journey is more rewarding than the destination.
Pompously yours,
Veb
Dr. J
“Seriously, baby, I can prescribe anything I want!” -Dr. Nick Riviera
Its been said earlier, but it bears repeating and repeating and repeating…
Mind Your Own Business.
All good things will come to those who do.
Youth really IS wasted on the young.
You are the last person you will sleep with; no matter how much you may love your SO, you are most important.
“Words fascinate me. They always have. For me, browsing in a dictionary is like being turned loose in a bank.” - Eddie Cantor
Keeping your mouth shut in responce to emotional outburst is usually the best revenge.
Breathe deeply and often.
What you’re doing at this minute may or may not matter to your overall well-being in 30 years. If it might matter, concentrate on it. Focus. If it might not matter, let it go. If you’re not sure, ask the SDMB’s opinion. 
“Finding someone” isn’t the end of the line at life. It shouldn’t be a goal. If you do find someone, life will continue, much like it would if you hadn’t, but you’ll have someone to go through life with. Counting on that person to change your life will cause a lot of problems. Finding yourself should be a bigger priority.
Follow your bliss.
Doing nothing. aka: waiting and seeing. Wanted for impersonating “doing something.” 10 billion counts of wasted time and energy. Consider armed and dangerous.
Love something completely. A person, a cat, your job, your hobby. Realise that most of the problems of the world are caused when you attempt to love more than one thing completely at the same time. Prioritize.
Make lists. Don’t loose them.
Know where you put your keys at all time.
A little persistance goes a long way. Announcing:
“I go on guilt trips a couple of time a year. Mom books them for me.” A custom made Wally .sig!
Contrary to what you’ve been led to believe, the boys will, NOT catch up in maturity in “a few years”.
You Play — You Pay!
Wisdom is the boobie prize,they give you when you’ve been --unwise!
If your friend says nasty things to you about other people behind their backs, she is saying nasty things about you to other people behind your back.
It took me a long time to learn that one.
Never attribute to malice anything that can be attributed to stupidity.
– Unknown
Nothing is so bad that it can’t get worse.
It’s my sig, wish I’d known that one sooner…
Nothing is so bad that it can’t get worse.
Don’t define yourself by your job, how much money you make, what you own, etc. There is SOOOO much more to life than that! I am a much happier person having come to that realization.
First impressions really DO matter! It takes a LOONG time to “undo” a bad first impression.
Don’t rest on your laurels. There is always someone out there that is better than you…losing sight of that can really cost you.
Money CANNOT buy happiness!!! I have less money than I have ever had in my life but I am happier than I have ever been.
No matter what your opinion is on something, there will be those out there willing to go out of their way to try and prove you wrong.
Many people will not necessarily respect an act of kindness.
If in a position of responsibility, any well thought out decision you make can and probably will be questioned by those of lesser position.
Be kind, be caring but above all be aware and alert for those willing to take advantage of your kind and caring nature.
Your bank is NOT your friend.
Your charge card company, no matter what they say, does not love you.
Beware the smiling sales person in car dealerships, television ads and magazines. They only want your money.
Have respect for the counter girl or guy in a grocery or department store. He or she is being paid very little to have to put up with rude, complaining customers who take out their hostilities on him or her.
Your city government really does not want your vote on things they wish to do, because they have already decided to do them.
Never get pissed at or argue with a police officer. He will win.
Never expect local road work to be done fast. Your city government did not hire the company for efficiency, but because they were the lowest bidder.
Be very, very careful about discussing your innermost secrets with your ‘bestest best friend’ because such friends can become enemies and blab them to everyone.
Lastly never, ever, ever expect too much understanding from people on the internet. There are those out there who live to argue, to deliberately insult you, to rip everything you say to shreds and will always have an opposing opinion.
Other than that, being an adult is cool. No one tells you when to go to bed, or what you can watch on TV, who you can hang with or that you drink too much. (Unless you’re married, that is.) 
CAREFUL! We don’t want to learn from this!(Calvin and Hobbs)
Don’t seek revenge.(or justice)
F. Always admit the truth about yourself to yourself.
4 ± 5i. No matter how independent and self-sufficient you consider yourself, you need human contact every once in a while.
64/3. A friend who abuses your friendship or yourself is no friend.
7.452 Some people do not have a sense of humor. Avoid them.
Here lies Pierre de Fermat. Unfortunately, there is not enough room on this tombstone for a proper epitaph.
A6: Education is very important, but don’t let it get in the way of finding a good job. Watch Jeopardy instead.
I’m a political prisoner trapped in a windowless cage
Cuz I stopped the slaughter of turnips by killing five men in a rage.
Not that there’s a troll here mind you, it’s something “I wish I’d known…”
Sweet Basil
SRB will get you girls!!
You have to know when to hold 'em.
You have to know when to fold 'em.
Know when to walk away.
Know when to run.
If it’s time for your big trapeese number and you find the ropes held together precariously with bananas DON’T USE IT!
Those orange coils inside the toaster are orange because their hot.
The headless animal crackers taste just the same as the whole ones, but are a great deal easier to catch.
Live well, love often, and hug your family every day.
Live long and prosper.
Judge not lest ye be judged.
The best way to have a true best friend is to be one.
Friends, family, people die. Life goes on.
Love, unlooked for, finds.
Hug someone every day, you will live a lot longer.
Smiles, like frowns, are self-fulfilling prophesies. Choose.
You are more than a human being, you are a human becoming.
Og Mandino
That’s my name, not a description. I am neither purple nor a bear. Okay, so I’m purple.<a true Wally original!>
If you should ever find yourself in the distant past, don’t touch anything as this might affect the timeline in subtle and unpredictable ways.