Just off the top of my head, I think we can add Tomas de Torquemada to the list.
MAXXXXXXXXXXIE ! If you leave this board, I will cry ! Not good enough you say ?
Hmmmm, ok, if you leave this board I will hunt you down and brand a map of Texas on yer butt ** and ** super glue a pair of cowboy boots (with the riding/high heels) on your feet and staple a stetson hat on to yer head ! 
*Note to self - don’t screw with Ayesha, she will definately hurt me.
Be afraid Max - verrrrrrry afraid.
Damn! That was awesome StrTrkr777. LMAO!
Hey, is MadHatter actually Max? Seriously! If it’s obvious, someone slap me. If it’s impossible, someone else slap me. It’s the end of a long day of work, so my brain is on the fritz.
Congratulations! You want to… you know you want to!
I hasten to point out …
max is still at 999
I am winning!
You ain’t winning shit, bloody OZ 
C’mon Max!! Post!! Show us you care!
Max…Torque…all those other names Jeffrey suggested…
It goes in waves, y’know? There’s that giddy rush of “omigod what a great place and buncha people!”, followed by obsessive posting, then the inevitable settling in.
Sure, you’re bitter and cynical. But ::Mouseketeer music swells:: “that’s why we LIKE you!” Okay, a paraphrase, but shaddup, I’m on a roll here…
Your 999 has been earned well, kiddo. Not post padding, no lame one/two line wonders, but real, funny, honest, sly, intelligent, sideways-demented posts.
So if you wimp out now we’ll just have whomp your sorry ass with a remaindered copy of Cecil Adams’s Barbara Cartland: Intellectual Travesty or Eco-Disaster Of Rain Forest Depletion.
Get a grip, ya weinie, or be prepared for the torch-waving mob of assembled Dopers to show up on your doorstep.
It won’t be pretty. Don’t force us to it.
Veb
to the tune of I am Evil Homer
He’s still on 9 9 9 yeah
He’s still on 9 9 9 yeah
he’s still on 9 9 9 yeah
sandyr,
And what am I, chopped liver?
Well, even though I bet I could whup y’all one at a time, I’d likely get clobbered by the lot of you together. So screw it, I’m stayin’.
No, Demo, I’m not MadHatter. I have only one ID on this board, and this is it.
Nice list o’ names, StrTrkr777. hehehe. Much appreciate it.
Anyway, on to something of substance for Post #1000. Posting a thousand times makes one consider just what he’s been doing, what was good, what sucked, all that kinda stuff. So, as I begin my second kilopost, I reckon this is what I oughtta shoot for:
-
stamp out ignorance, remembering that some folk’s ignorance takes more stamping than others.
-
keep the humor level high, disregarding the derisive tongue-cluckings of the humor-impaired.
-
remember well that no one is above an ass-whuppin’.
-
and finally, treat every post as a reflection on myself.
That’s about it. Thanks for being a great bunch of homo sapiens, all. You’ll have to put up with me for a while longer yet. On to the next thousand!
Congratulations, Max Torque. Many happy returns, and here is your gift from me: an underage goat-felching stripper. Enjoy.
Dang it now that whole three minutes I spent coming up with all those cool user names has gone to waste.
Attention lurkers who have not registered yet. You have my permission to pick any of the above user names as your own, I will not expect any royalties for their use. Your using them is payment enough.
Welcome back anyway Max.
Jeffery
I see he went ahead and did it.
I think he should have stuck at 999. Third cousin of the beast.
There was a man named Max Torque
Who hit a posting cork
Should I leave or stay
He did ponder and say
Which…oh…he did it…never mind.
I guess I got here too late, but sure, go for 1000.
And as for wearing out the board, let it alone for two weeks vacation and everything and everybody is new.