You really gotta read the Amazon reviews for this one.
Haven’t read reviews like this since Disney’s Brave came out on DVD.
I particularly like the reviewer who couldn’t spell “terrifying” and got autocorrected to “Satan is terraforming.” So we should send Satan to Mars, then?
Out of 185, 23% gave it 4 stars, and 73% gave it 1 star, with only a few votes in between. It seems like most of the reviews are by people who didn’t actually buy it. When I tried to register a review, I got this message:
You can also select for reviews that mention:
bible thumpers
pure evil
stay away
satanic garbage
little ones
kill and destroy
steal kill
expose your children
I’d like to be able to post a review as a demon* complaining about all the kids summoning them willy-nilly and bossing them around. (That has to annoy demons, right?)
*But not enough to register a whole new account with a demon name.
If you sort the reviews by “Verified Purchase”, there’s only about 10 of them and they all rated it highly. They also point out that the demons in the book are very obviously made up.
Oh, I gotta buy this book!
I would hate to summon a demon, have it show up, and find out it was a fake one.
The demons are just made up? Well, as soon as you posted that, I sent the book back for a refund.
Imagine my shock when I discovered that many of my most beloved characters were also made up (even in Dickens and Austen!). Those books are getting returned, too… (no, Barnes and Noble, I don’t know where I bought them or how many years ago, but I’m not leaving this store until I see someone in charge who’s responsible for selling these imaginary books!)
:smack: Okay, okay. I mean, they’re not the demons of classic mythology, but just lame-o noob demons that don’t have a legion* of fans yet. Although I do predict a great career for Flatulus.
- Ha!
I sent my liberal parents Rick Santorum’s coloring book awhile back as a joke gift. Perhaps this I’ll send this to my conservative in-laws.
For those interested in demonology, I can recommend Who In Hell? by Sean Kelly and Rosemary Rogers. It list not only damned souls but also the more prominent devils and demons.
Who has summoned Arglagh the Impaler?
Oh, great Arglagh, I…hold up, one of your horns just fell off!
Uh–yeah,they do that.
Demons horns fall off?
Yes, this is molting season.
But this one is made from an ice cream cone and masking tape!
Now I want to publish a book titled “Satan Has Two Mommies” so I can see if I can top the outrage this book caused.
Someone needs to do a perfect pastiche of an old Golden Book where the school children learn to respect everyone and get along with each other… and the demons they’ve summoned.
All i can do is picture Matt Shatt from SNL saying that.
“MATT”
And the first one star review I read there was a hilarious bit of satire. "My kid keeps calling himself the “Lord of Maggots…oh God, he’s outside the door”
Reminds me of The Devil’s Storybook by Natalie Babbitt
In one story, a meek mild man, who did gardening for a hobby, dies and goes to Hell because Lord-only-knows-why, where he finds that he isn’t allowed to grow roses. He makes a deal with the Devil, whereby he is allowed to grow thistles instead.
The Poky Little Succubus
I dunno, I’d think the, ah, pokey ones would tend to be incubi…