Ouch! I haven’t done that in ages; I’m never sure which is stronger, the irritation at wasting those sleeping hours getting ready, or the relief that you can go back to bed.
I used my airmiles to get a Ray Charles and friends cd of duets of old classics, and it’s kind of pissing me off; I’m listening to Ray Charles and Natalie Cole singing “Fever,” and Natalie’s voice is lovely, then Ray comes in, sounding just awful. It’s the same with almost all of the songs - Ray’s voice is kind of ruining them. I respect the man and his reputation and all that, but there comes a point when your voice just isn’t cutting it any more, and he recorded this cd after that point was reached, obviously.
Laplace transforms, differential equations, calculus and basic algebra are all things that are included on our list of things we know. In fact, we all take many math classes specifically designed for engineers so that we know those things. So it really isn’t necessary to spend the first six weeks of class reteaching us any of this. How about spending that time teaching us about useful things, like how to draw block diagrams so that we can don’t all fail your second midterm. Also, no one memorizes Laplace transforms on purpose except to be pretentious. So let us have a table for tests.
Sister-in-law, my husband keeps telling you in reply to your Facebook wall posts to contact me via E-mail (and giving you the address) for planning what to bring for Thanksgiving. We don’t have your E-mail address or your phone number, and I’m not on Facebook. The reason why we haven’t told you via Facebook is because you’ve made posts to him 3 different times asking what you can bring, worded as if you’ve never asked him before. Please sober up before getting on your computer and posting “love you soooo much bro, what can I bring?” messages.
We don’t believe you’ll remember our response even if we responded to one of your drunken wall posts, and we’d see yet another “what can I bring???!!1” from you.
Using the term “US American” automatically brands you as an irritating wanker. Yes there are a lot of countries on the American continents. But you know what? Every single one of them except the USA has a name that’s easy to turn into a national epithet. Canada = Canadians. Mexico = Mexicans. Brazil = Brazilians.
And you know what? If you want to talk about South America as a whole you can say “South Americans”. Ditto “Central Americans” and “North Americans”.
So just get the fuck over yourself and your fucking snotty barely-glossed-over anti-Americanism. We don’t fucking like you either. I bet it never fucking occurred to you that we’re just people, too. Piss off.
A week ago my arachnophobic wife calls me into the bathroom to swat a spider that is out of her reach. A cortisone shot to my shoulder, some oxycodone, a week of rest and lots of Aleve later, I can finally comb my hair and dress myself without excruciating pain in my right deltoid. Fuckin’ spiders.
Hey, we need people to sign up for OVERTIME next week!
Hey boss, when one of the days is a holiday and you don’t count that towards regular hours, it means the extra hours you want us to work are NOT overtime.
Hey soon-to-be-Ex, what you did to our son today was mean. He was really excited about watching his teacher’s drumming group perform at the festival. You should have led him to that part of the building instead of making him and his little friend stay clear on the other side. They could barely hear the performance and didn’t see a bit of it.
I’m sure the kids WERE being rambunctious beforehand, they were SO excited about seeing their teacher. Insisting they calm down first would have been prudent. Yep. But you didn’t need to make him miss the whole thing. Broke his little 6-yr-old heart.
p.s. I’ll bet his friend’s mom is PISSED. You’re gonna have to deal w/her on your own. heh.
You haven’t heard my mother, that’s the problem. The woman can put more fake in “good morning” than a whole chain of plastic surgery clinics can put on tits.
I was idly scrolling through my cell phone this past weekend, when I ran into the phone number of my now-dead cousin. I thought about it for a moment - hesitated, really - and then, I deleted her contact information from my phone. She’s been gone for months, might as well not pocket-dial some random person in Warsaw.
A small gesture, crazier not to do so then to keep a dead woman’s defunct cell number. Still. I didn’t expect it to hurt so much.
I have apparently perfected the one-second stinkeye.
I’m browsing in a bookstore over the weekend when I hear someone behind me babbling nonstop in her Cellphone Voice. I swivel my head around to confirm this, making brief eye contact.
This triggers about two minutes of nonstop cellphone babbling to the effect that “someonegavemeadirtylookfortalkingonmycellphone,howaboutthatIdidn’trealizeyouhadtobequietandnottalkonyourcellphoneinabookstore,arebookstoressupposedtobequietplaces,canyoubelievethat…”
Somewhat gratifyingly however, this and subsequent nonstop babbling were at approximately 50% less decibels.
I was browsing in a bookstore last week, and someone came in blabbing away on their cell nice and loudly; I kept moving away from her, and she kept following me. I finally just fled. It must have looked like something from a comedy skit.
I just realized that on Friday night, somewhere between locking the door and passing out fully clothed on top of the covers, I managed to write and send a very wordy, very mushy, very embarrassing (albeit impressively spelled and punctuated, under the circumstances) text message. :smack:
An open request to internet genealogy searchers: stop being such a bunch of retards. When someone’s tree states that an ancestor was born in 1618 in Connecticut, you might just try to jostle those brain cells a bit to question such an obviously wrong “fact”, instead of just copying it to your own family tree and furthering the lie.
Thanks. Also, you should never come work in my office. My boss’s boss and my officemate are both bad about this. Your forehead would get flat from all the self-inflicted :smack:.
