I remember reading a funny legal blog entry last year that revealed that California State Police “Drug Recognition Experts” officially held that a green tongue was an indicator of marijuana use and were acting accordingly.
Turns out, they’re apparently committed to that assertion, and the press* is passing it on deadpan
I have a hard time believing this isn’t the result of a prank up there with the ‘desk pop’ in terms of requiring a very special kind of goat to carry off.
“Oh, of course, Ralph. The green tongue thing’s real - it’s that hydroponic, that’s barely even a plant anymore! You should probably lead with that, it’s gritty stuff.”
Well, having just went through an unneccessarily hostile pullover and subsequent sobriety check, I might be able to enlighten a bit…They (police) had me first recite the alphabet slowly, without “singing it”. Then, when it became known that I was a paraplegic and used a wheelchair, the cops had me count backwards from 100 to 80. After that, I had to close my eyes and touch the tip of my nose with my index finger (with both hands). All this, just because they caught me in (what I consider unfair) a speed trap going about 10-12mph over the limit. :dubious:
I remember my Dad coming into the kitchen in a panic one day. He asked me to look at his tongue - it was green. Very, very green. He was sure he had some kind of illness and asked me, a twelve year old child, what I thought it was.
Um, Dad, you chew at least a pack of Clorets gum a day - those are green, no?
He was very relieved and not a little embarrassed.
Because no one’s heart rate and blood pressure would ever go up when it’s being taken during a traffic stop :rolleyes: Nope, not nerve wracking at all.
