A Modest Proposal

The BBQ Pit
#1

Equality is a good thing if everyone’s equal, but we all know that the world doesn’t work that way.

Paying to post is going to happen, but what we need is a fee structure to reflect this inequality. Should Eve and Slip pay the same fee for posting? There’s an inequality right there. One is bright, articulate, witty and a joy to read.

Okay, so is Eve. Bad example.

Anyway, let’s make a list. The following are examples and you’re free to add, subtract, disagree, hijack, ignore or start a flame war:

Fenris: Free. Unlimited.
Hiyruu: $10 per post. Surcharge for any mention of faster than light and the golden spiral.
Polycarp: Free. Unlimited.
Feynn: $20 per year. Confined to hockey topics only. Free if he loses the Habs.
jarbabyj: $1 per year, unlimited, to be refunded if “twatclamp” and “crumpetnipple” are used in any post.
Ginger: Free. Unlimited. (She’s a Canadian redhead. That’s got to be worth something right there.)
Bossk: $250 per year. One post per month. Ten word limit.
SPOOFE: Free. Unlimited. Exception: Defending Microsoft.

Hell, I just realized I’ve got a ton of names here. Let’s leave something for the five or six posters who may be moved to respond to this silliness, Slip.

It’s all yours, guys.

#2

I could swing that.

By the way, is posting to alt.fan.cecil-adams really so horrifyingly unthinkable for the have-nots?

Though as a second option, we can always bring in Bud Selig for a nominal fee. I’m sure he would find an amicable solution to the parity problem for everyone.

#3

Okay, who are you and what have you done with our Bossk?

That was funny.

#4

Ok, I gotta say it.

I TOLD YOU SO!

#5

What the fuck is this “have-nots” shit? Just because someone dooesn’t have the cash for a messageboard doesn’t make them a have-not.

And what about the other 75% of people who won’t be paying…the “Want-nots”…I fall into that category. I “want-not” to pay for a fucking messageboard and I stand by my decision.

So get off your high-horse and realize that just because someone has different priorities in life other than spending money on the SDMB, doesn’t make them a have-not. Get over yourselves.

Sam

#6

This is really dumb and lends itself heavily to the “SDMB is a fucking clique” argument.

#7

Slip with all due respect, fuck this shit! There’s enough divisiveness over this issue without running a popularity contest.

#8

I only did it because I knew it would lend itself heavily to pissing you off, leander.

#9

Either some people will have some fun with this thread, or it will simply sink like a stone.

One thing it won’t do is have any effect on anyone’s opinion on the pay to post situation.

#10

Slip Cocksucker is that YOU!? :smiley:

#11

Key riced!

Now they’re coming after me on their third post.

Thanks for the greets, SexyPilot.

Go fly a kite.

#12

Esprix: $3.

(think about it.)

#13

Would that be the official SDMB gay discount? :slight_smile:

So, how much should I be charged? He asks innocently.

#14

I highly resent the obviously unfounded notion that I contribute anything worthwhile to the Board, and as such demand that I am charged a huge sum.

#15

Likewise, SPOOFE.
I think Slip just wants to see a nekkid snob in her natual habitat.

:smiley:

#16

Seconded. :smiley:

#17

You will be charged one (1) football bat. :slight_smile:

#18

And here, I thought this would be a suggestion that the unfunded members simply be eaten by the underfunded members.

#19

Ogre: Free if he can come through on that whole “Sledgehammer the commandments” bit. Otherwise, free because he’s had to suffer Alabama for so many years.

matt_mcl: 69 cents (so really about four dollars American).

::runnin’ away. HOo boy::

#20

Err, 4 dollars Canadian.

Thanks to Captain Amazing for pointing out my error, though I’m sure matt would love that kind of exchange rate:-)