Interesting, it’s totally the opposite here. Possibly because Africans are quite rare here, but my experience is that black women (black in general, not just Africans) will not go anywhere near white men unless the man is very rich or otherwise very high status. And often not even then.
Would you say that white male/black female relationships in SA are more common for strictly financial reasons? In other words, are the black women interested in white men because it’s better than going through dumpsters looking for food, or is it that there’s a cultural/social attraction? Is there a kind of cool-factor involved, or is it purely the expectation that white males have more money/better prospects?
I voted “other”; I have dated outside my race, and had sex outside my race, but not with the same people.
Is race ever a factor for you with regard to your dating choices?
I have never let it stand in the way, but it does seem to affect my choices in some contexts (online, for instance).
Do other interracial couples you run across grab your attention more than a same-race couple? If so, why?
I really don’t “run across” couples all that much, but no, I don’t think so.
Would you be turned off, unaffected, or complimented if someone new you were dating told you that they were mainly/only interested in dating people of your race? I think I’d be unaffected, possibly turned off depending on how it was said. I can’t imagine feeling complimented, although if she’s hot enough, I might feel grateful!
Thinking about it, I realise that I am not particularly attracted to people outside my own race. Consquently I have never dated nor had sex outside said race. If other people want to have interractial relationships, I have no problem with that, but it obviously (for some reason) is not for me.
If someone pointed out to me that they only dated people of my particular race, I don’t think I would be turned off or affected in any way. I wouldn’t necessarily see it as a compliment, as I too appear to fal into that category!
I’m white and have only ever been attracted to whites, which is fortunate because my family would disown me were it otherwise. I think I would be in literal physical danger from a couple of them.
I went for the second option with the understanding that I was answering as if I weren’t currently married. Clearly I ain’t dating anyone anytime soon, for reasons that have nothing to do with race.
I live in South London where interracial couples are incredibly common (predominantly black men/white women or white men/South Asian women). It’s not a big deal here.
I voted other as I married my Chinese borna nd raiswed and passport carrying wife 16 years and 3 daughters ago. I tend toward asian women but dated plenty of white women as well. Did that in asia too.
Asian fetish - no dought it exists. But I also think it’s exaggeratd. It’s like being attracted to a blonde is ‘normal’ but being attracted to an Asian is a perversion.
Note I say ‘attracted’ rather than ‘obsessed.’
I became fluent in chinese. No doubt part of that was an attraction to the people, culture, the exciting times, the adventure, etc. No dought attraction to the opposite sex played a part. Not that big though as women you dated casually could easily end up in jail back in 1980’s China.
Don’t tell that to my parents. My mom, who’s black, fell head over heels for my dad, who’s white and, trust me, my dad, a recent military draftee headed for bootcamp, had no money or status back then.
Ah, Shakester, I just read that you’re in Australia. I thought you were in the US. I do find it strange that most black women in your country won’t go “anywhere near white men.” There’s a little of that here in the States as well, but I think it’s probably no where near as prevalent as in Australia.
I have to say, being in an interracial relationship has taught me a great deal and expanded my horizons even more and I wouldn’t change it for the world.
I don’t consider it any different from dating someone from a different nationality and don’t give it a second thought in either case.
I’ve dated people from all over, of every different color and accent. If they’d have me I’d have them!
But I am not allowed to date anyone anymore, because my Mig would be more than a little miffed.
Age, 38. Location, Appalachian Ohio. Currently dating my favorite person in the world who happens to be black. Our racial differences haven’t seemed significant to me, though I’ll grant that may be because we are still long distance and haven’t been together all that long. I don’t foresee any issues from my family about the relationship.
While I’m open to the idea that I’m just defensive, I’m having a tough time agreeing with your points. Yes, my boyfriend is black and I am white, and if I continue to date him I am taking him out of the dating pool for black women. But isn’t that his choice to make, rather than mine?
There’s something that feels patronizing in the idea that if only I were to step aside, my boyfriend would then date within his race. Do I have that sort of power?
I disagree with the term “taking him out of the dating pool for black women”, I see this in film and TV a lot and I don’t get get it. A black woman dating a white man also takes him out of the dating pool for black women, and a white woman dating a white man also takes him out of the dating pool for… oh I get it… black women only wanna date black men? (stereotypically?)
I voted “I’ve both dated and had sex with someone of another race (but we didn’t marry)” but wanted to select “Other” as I have both dated and had sex with someone of another race, but we HAVEN’T married (yet). Your wording makes it sound like the dating was in the past.
To answer your other questions…
-Race is no factor in my dating choices. Entering into same-sex relationships already creates a problem with who i bring home, but I don’t mind who it is.
-Other interracial couples do grab my attention, only if they are of the same make-up as mine (white/asian). Part of this though is me joking with my b/f that white guys who date Asian guys are in a secret club (ala Larry David with being bald) and that we give each other a wink and a nod.
The other reason for this I guess though is that I tend to think of most people as not “dating outside their race”. Australian’s have been brought up as being “very multicultural” but a group of 5 white guys will generall have 5 white girlfriends.
-I would be indifferent/turned off but cautious & curious. Some people could view race how they view hair colour, in that they prefer one thing but really like another. Some could also view it as hair colour, where they see you as nothing more than your hair colour.
Is race ever a factor for you with regard to your dating choices?
No.
Do other interracial couples you run across grab your attention more than a same-race couple? If so, why?
No.
Would you be turned off, unaffected, or complimented if someone new you were dating told you that they were mainly/only interested in dating people of your race?
I’d be turned off. I’ve actually heard this before, and I don’t like it. It’s more common in lily white Minnesota than it was back in California. I think the guys here have never seen dark people, so they think it’s something special or interesting. It’s not. I’m boring, just like everyone else, only darker.
I’m black, and I’ve dated and slept with people of different races (this makes me seem whorish), married a black guy. Well, Obama black. Not real black.
They always do. Always. Usually, and I guess this makes perfect sense, it’s a “positive” stereotype. I suppose it makes sense you’d want to date people that you assume have positive qualities. I’ve heard a lot from white guys who expect me to be wild in bed, or expect that I’m necessarily more down to earth because I’m black, and am going to “keep it real” all the time, which is refreshing because white women don’t “keep it real,” bla bla bla. I mean, I do keep it real, but still…
Word. My sisters will not date outside of their race. They simply will not. My oldest sister tried briefly, and she simply does not like guys who aren’t black. At all. This sounds crazy to me; I like whoever laughs at my jokes. I don’t know a single male who wouldn’t sleep with a pretty girl because of her race. Maybe some who wouldn’t marry or date seriously, but they’d shag a girl who’s cute if she were green. Hmm, so would I, but only so I could say I shagged a green person.
I’ve seen - as far as I can recall - exactly two couples where the female was black African and the male was white European in my entire life. In the same time frame, I’ve seen hundreds of couples, literally, the other way around. It also seems true of non-African black women, too: south Indians, Pacific islanders, etc, though that’s more common than Africans.
I have my theories as to why that is: basically we get bombarded with US media which promotes African Americans as the coolest people on Earth. It creates, as it were, a demand… and there’s very little supply. I got to see this up close, since a good friend of mine is a black African (born in Kenya) male: we shared a house for four years and I got very tired of of seeing women throwing themselves at him based on nothing more than their fantasy of what “black men” are like. Even he got sick of it, after taking advantage a couple of hundred times (no exaggeration). Other black African men I’ve known get the same treatment, it wasn’t an anomaly, that’s for sure.
I’m less sure about why black women here just don’t “date” white men - probably a number of different reasons, but I’d say one reason is the other side of that coin: the demand is much greater than the supply, so they’d get an endless stream of white men throwing themselves at them… and I can see how that might very well put you off the whole idea.
We’ve had an influx of African refugees in the last decade, so with a much larger African presence eventually people will start seeing them as people and not as super sex beasts from the jungle. I hope.
From what I can see, there are different reasons why many black American women aren’t interested in white men, but I’m sure there are plenty of people here who know more about that than I do, so I’ll stay out of that question.
I do think this whole poll/question about interracial relationships is very interesting, anyway. Lots of different attitudes, and (as I said before) different “rules” in different places.
I agree with you. I reported my OP yesterday and requested a wording change, but I never heard back from a mod or an admin, so I think I’m stuck with my mistake. Thanks for voting in the spirit of the question, though.
The majority of the people I’ve dated have been white, I’ll admit. Part of that is where I live (predominantly white). Also, when it comes to men, I tend to be more attracted to white men (I love blue eyes!). But when it comes to women (I’m bi), I like Asians and white women equally. I’ve dated Latino men, Asian women, slept with black men, Native American men, slept with Latina women.
While I find myself more attracted to white men in general, I have been attracted to men and women from many nationalities.
I’m in an interracial marriage. I’m Black, born and raised in the US, with the usual genetic muddling that entails. My wife is Asian (100% Han Chinese as far back as she can tell, which is several generations), born in Hong Kong and raised in Canada.
In the past I’ve dated girls/women of various races and ethnic groups, with a slight preference towards darker skinned women.
- Is race ever a factor for you with regard to your dating choices?
Race has never been a serious factor with regard to my dating choices, but cultural background definitely did. It was mainly for this reason that I never dated a white woman.
- Do other interracial couples you run across grab your attention more than a same-race couple? If so, why?
Only if it’s a really unusual pairing.
**
Would you be turned off, unaffected, or complimented if someone new you were dating told you that they were mainly/only interested in dating people of your race?**
Mainly unaffected. Some people are attracted to a certain thing, if that’s all it is with no underlying cultural issues, it doesn’t bother me at all.
