Where in the name of all that seeks correction do they find the inspiration for their stories such as:
“250 lb. Baby Found!”
“Saddam practices Macarena”
“Bat boy is missing”
“Japanese sub still fighting in WW2”
…I’ve been wondering this for a while…Are there actually some stories that have a grain of truth to them (like “Human billiard table” and “5-yr old hellion wreaks havoc in home daily”)?
Is Bat Boy missing again?? Dang it!! I knew he was obsessed with Jenna Bush and wanted to go fight Osama, but i didn’t know he was missing again!!!
Yeah, it looks like he led police on a low speed freeway chase, a la O.J. Simpson.
Or stole a police car, or something.
I mean, I know that Countess Sophia Sabak is helping out with charitible matters overseas while her daughter Serena mans (womans?) the psychic column, but as to the origins of the headlines listed in my OP, I’m puzzled…Is it just made up, and how?
I can’t remember where I read this, but the offices of the tabloid next door (I believe it’s the National Enquirer) had to be sound proofed because the folks at WWN were laughing too loud. My guess is that given the location of the home offices of the paper, they’re in Florida and have a really good drug connection!
[Ed Anger]This is why we need the draft back. Whiney kids these days would be better off putting their butts on the line in the trenches instead of asking stupid questions. People like Joe K make me madder than John Wayne at a chick flick film festival![/Ed Anger]
A friend of mine (no reliable cite available) claims that the WWN offices are populated by graduates of journalism schools from places like Harvard and Duke. According to my friend, they spend their time getting drunk on the beach and making up stories.
Wonder if they’re hiring?
The Weekly World News is printed on the National Enquirer’s old black and white presses. Both of those papers, and their fellow tabloid The Star, have the same owner.
I’m quite concerned about the Bat Boy. He’s obviously stepped on a rusty nail somewhere along the line as his mouth is always locked wide open. Someone get that kid a tetanus shot and call child services!
How did the tabloids ever survive before Photoshop?
I can’t cite currently, but in the print edition of Advertising Age it’s revealed that the Bat Boy steals Mini Cooper cover story is…
Wait for it…
Product Placement.
LOL!!! WTG, WWN!
You know, maybe I should’ve previewed the above before clicking on “submit.” Now I look like a 12 year old AOL user. :rolleyes:
A 12 year old AOL user who, more frighteningly, is blatantly unconcerned with the journalistic integrity of the Weekly World News.
I imagine that their inspiration comes from neither drugs nor the Florida sun. It’s just following a simple formula.
Take something. Then think of it doing something outlandish that could never happen. Voila! You have a headline:
House cat graduates from college
New engine runs on water, gets 200 mpg
Shakespeare’s secret pornographic writings found
Russia’s cosmonaut graveyard found on moon
Then the story should come from the headline. Use made-up names, small towns that don’t exist, details that make the story sound convincing, and if you need some “expert” sources, attribute them to unnamed scientists:
“Fluffy, a nine-year-old Maine coon cat owned by Peter and Marge Tucker of New Wickham, Pennsylvania, graduated Tuesday from Canaria University, with a degree in English literature.”
“‘We were a little shaken at first,’ Peter Tucker said. ‘Other cats come home from their trips outdoors with mice. But Fluffy was coming home with copies of Dickens and Austen. She didn’t tell us she was a student at Harvard until she was a sophomore.’”
“‘Fluffy was an outstanding student,’ says Professor Albert Dunn, one of Fluffy’s instructor’s. ‘Her paper on the use of imagery in Shakespeare was one of the best papers on that topic that I have ever seen.’”
– Then just keep going. That’s about all there is to it really.
Oh, and if there really is a New Wickham, Pennsylvania (complete with Peter and Marge Tucker); or a Canaria University (with a Professor Albert Dunn); or indeed, if the WWN has ever used any of the headlines I listed, my apologies. I didn’t have time to not-fact-check this one.
(No, I have never written for the WWN. I did, however, turn a boring office newsletter into a WWN-style newsletter though. Hey, it was an extremely dull place to work; this helped me keep my sanity.)
A friend of mine who reads WWN regularly says they recycle old stories. When he discovered that, he quit buying it.
I wanted to submit some articles myself, as I have some evidence that Elvis left Bigfoot with a lovechild, but their website says they don’t accept anything except from their own staff, and that all their articles are 100 PERCENT TRUE. whatevah.
I get my journalism master’s degree from Boston University this May. Say what you will about the WWN, but they’re the first paper I’ll apply to once I’m done here.
Spoons, fer chrissake, don’t just GIVE that gold away. Make 'em pay for it. Now they’re going to run that amazing story, using you as a “reliable source,” quoting this board word-for-word.
i just went to weeklyworldnews.com and downloaded the batboy and “Man grows hair on bald eagles” desktops!