“Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man.”
See? So why is Ol’ Blowjobby so embarrassed anyway? He must have spit instead of swallowing.
Orange semen.
For all your good intentions, here is where I think you make your crutial mistake with this board. This is an example, but you do it often:
You have made a statement of fact. You’ve made a statement of fact without firsthand knowledge of anyone’s vagina, and apparently without much research. Now, Dopers have a wealth of knowledge and a variety of experience. You have to be very careful with statements of fact here - a throwaway comment about the speed of light can bring a response from someone with a PhD in astrophysics to correct your misconception. You have to be careful with even obscure knowledge around here. However, vaginas aren’t obscure. Most Dopers, I’d hasten to guess, have intimate knowledge with either their own vaginas or other peoples vaginas or both. Which you, admittedly, lack.
This board isn’t a bad place for being educated. You learn a lot here if you approach the gaps in your knowledge with a little humility and a sense of humor. But it does get exceptionally snarky and the slap down response comes out hard when people post “facts” that have as their base urban legend, religous logic (the Bible says so, so its true), or locker room talk.
Had you said:
I don’t have that fetish either , but the fact that the anus is a dirty place wouldn’t hold me back from having anal sex. From what I’ve heard my friends say, the vagina isn’t a pleasant place, either- it smells like a fish market, and is hairy, and sometimes infected, and urine comes out, and blood, and it contains a mucus layer at first, and other men have probably been in it with their penises already.
We’d all have been laughing at your friends (and perhaps your gullibility in believing that the vagina itself was hairy and was somehow connected to the bladder).
The cover of “my friend” is a handy one for making potentially stupid statements.
Well, you have to do it right…
:o :eek: :o :eek: :o :eek: :o :eek: :wally :smack:
To the poster who requested my email- I had forgotten that I didn’t link to it in my user profile. I had to start a new hotmail account, because my regular one has my full name in the address. Anyways, that address (which is now linked to in my profile) is andrewdt85@hotmail.com. Anyone can contact me for a copy of the material I mentioned, and I’ll be glad to send it to you.
The only problem is that you probably aren’t going to request it for the purpose of improving me- you will do it in order to poke more fun at me.
When I changed my email in my user profile, I didn’t see the email I’d gotten telling me to reactivate my account, so when I tried to post here, I was deactivated. That’s why I thought I was temporarily deactivated by the Mods, and I read the rest of this thread to see if they explained why in here. Luckily, I accessed my email again and realized that I just needed to click the link to reactivate my account now that I’d made a change to it. That’s why I’m back again, but I needed to give you my email anyways, and I have more to say.
There are things here I hate, and I think they should change (you can disagree):
1.) When someone displays ignorance, you need to just CORRECT THEM and EDUCATE THEM. I was MORE THAN WILLING TO ACCEPT MY IGNORANCE after I said that vagina comment. Christ, you talk about me overreacting to other people’s words, but YOU JUMPED ALL OVER ME AS IF I HAD MURDERED SOMEONE. YOU TOOK AS MUCH OFFENSE AT WHAT I HAD SAID AS IF I HAD… CHRIST, DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE JUMPED ON WHEN ALL YOU WANT IS TO HEAR PEOPLE’S CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISMS? I JUST WANT TO IMPROVE MYSELF, AND IN ORDER TO DO THAT I NEED TO HEAR YOUR CRITICISMS WITHOUT SNARKINESS.
I hate you for how you jump on people and isolate them like this- I hate you, and I really mean that. You jump on people and isolate them like this, when they show NOTHING BUT INTEREST IN IMPROVING THEMSELVES. There are users here- I won’t name names- who periodically make crass statements about obese people, women, etc., and you don’t touch them. As the one poster said in this thread, you jumped on me a dozen times for that statement partly because of who I am. Some of the responders didn’t know of my past, of course, but some did.
THE PROBLEM IS YOU, NOT JUST ME-
2.) The problem is that you want to express insults, not constructive criticisms. When someone pisses you off, by making an ignorant comment on something, or by making a despicable insult at someone who had insulted him, instead of just correcting that person with constructive criticism, you are pleased to have them in the middle of a circle, isolated and bombarded by insults on all sides. YOU ARE BULLYS, AND YOU ARE FUCKING BAD AT CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. You call me the immature one eleanorrigby, when all of you are the schoolyard kids; the whole time, I’m screaming out “STOP HURTING ME AND GIVE ME CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM.” And you call me the child.
I’m giving up. You obviously don’t want to give me any more constructive criticism. You love the hunt, the kill of the loser who makes stupid comments and isolates himself. I just want to post here and have conversations about things- you want to belong to an exclusive club full of big-headed folks who put down people instead of help them change. You love argument, and pittings, more than conversations and debate. I can’t take this- I love to talk here and learn things, but I can’t take this side of SD.
Someone asked, logically, ‘why post somewhere where you hate the users and their snarkiness?’ The answer, as I alluded to just now, is that I hate one aspect of you but want the other- I want to learn and discuss things, but I hate the part of you that craves arguments and pittings more than conversations and debates. You are the children- and most of the world is too.
We’ve secretly replaced andrewdt85’s keyboard with a Random Ignorant Abusive Gibberish Generator. Let’s see if he notices any difference.
Thank you for your constructive criticism, Dangerosa. My god, are you okay? Do you really belong to this board? I can’t believe it…
Dangerosa, I stated my ignorant comment as fact because I really thought all of it was fact. I have been warned, such as in my ‘Fuck cars’ thread, that stating my opinion as fact is an aggravating thing. Thank you for reminding me of that, as I am now recording it:
- Be sure to never state your opinion as fact, or use the phrase ‘As we all know…’ If you aren’t 100% certain of something, ask first.
As is, I wouldn’t have made that vagina statement if I was unsure about the facts- I really was ignorant of my ignorance. If you read my posts, I hope that it’s obvious that I don’t really kid about anything- my policy, as of November, has been that whatever I say, I must say as if it was life and death. Even when I made the insult to Ink, I made that insult because I was following a rule I gave myself previously (eye for an eye).
Again, thank you for your constructive criticism, Dangerosa.
And may I have another?
Seriously.
I am not Dangerosa, but may I suggest limited use of all caps? Caps are for yelling, and when you yell, be it on a message board or real life, it makes other people want to yell back. A lot of the time it then turns into a ‘who can be loudest’ thing rather then a ‘who can be constructive thing’. You seem to yell a lot. You did yell at someone in the anal sex thread (for the record I was surprised the number of woman who hadn’t had anal sex was so low).
Let’s have more constructive criticism posts- I’ll make the point that those are few and far between. Look at this table diagraming every post since my last two asking for constructive criticism:
My post in which I talk about constructive criticism, post 147
1.) A joke about tar.
2.) Eleanorrigby says I have a point
3.) I can’t believe he didn’t ask to close this thread he started. Did he apologize to Ink?
4.) Yes, he did.
5.) Cervaise gives me a long paragraph about how I was never solid, followed by telling me to fuck off
6.) Andrew’s posting hasn’t changed- almost a constructive argument, but here’s the thing- you are vague. Elaborate-* how *have I not changed? Or better yet, how do I need to change?
7.) You can understand how I didn’t see his apology…
8.) Having a cocky young ignoramus is an essential thing on this board- if we boot him, another will pop up
9.) Sex joke
10.) You’re email’s not up- obviously because you were lying before
11.) You really care about what people here think of you?
12.) I blame the educational system for why he didn’t know about the vagina
13.) Smiley
14.) Sex joke
15.) Sex joke
16.) CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM!
17.) Sex joke
My next post
18.) My keyboard is a random ignorant insult generator
I thank Dangerosa for his/her constructive criticism
And ask for more
Thank you for your constructive criticism, Queuing.
Yes, I know using caps is bad form- and I’ve been told plenty about it. Back in November, I used to use caps even when I was just making point or trying to make my question stand out, without being aggravated or frustrated.
This time was different- I started yelling because of that reason. That said, even if I’m as worked up as I was, it’s not an excuse- yelling only turns people off of your message, not onto it.
- Even if you’re aggravated and frustrated and desparate to make a point, yelling is not the answer
Thanks again for your constructive criticism.
Maybe you might want to take a break from posting for a while, especially to the Pit? It’s clear that you want to improve yourself, but all this is flat out bizarre. If burning giraffes came waltzing through this thread, I wouldn’t be surprised.
Just a thought.
Or if clocks should melt…
Sure, if you are 100% sure it is fact, ask yourself “how do I know this.” Personal experience is personal experience, but even there, be careful that you don’t generalize from one instance. (i.e. “in my experience, all vaginas smell like fish” may not be accurate if your only girlfriend enjoyed fish oil douches) If you know it from a book or because someone told you, question the source. Some sources are better than others. Your anatomy text would be a good source for information on a vagina, dirty jokes would not be.
Second, when reading anyone’s post - start with the assumption that they are well intentioned. Most Dopers are. Assume that if people are poking at you, they are doing it to tease and to get a laugh. Then don’t go defensive. Instead, start laughing at yourself. Humility goes a long way on this board. (So does conceited smartassery, but it takes a certain amount of practice and wit).
Third, think before you hit submit. I write about three responses for every one that gets the submit button pushed. Sometimes I finish composing what I want to say and just realize I’m not adding any value. Sometimes I finish composing and realize that I’m venting at someone, or over reacting, and I just don’t post. Sometimes I realize what I said was just stupid.
Seriously, think about limiting the number of threads you start. Starting threads is a little attention whorish. Lots of people talk on this board, let them have space for their threads on the front page. Read more, talk less.
After five years, yep, I belong here. If I didn’t, I’d have crashed and burned or gotten bored long ago.
Oh, and let go, you can’t control the direction a thread takes. The giraffe comment is funny.
Ain’t THAT the truth!
Andrew, there are definitely a lot of people on this (or any other) messageboard who seem to encourage chaos. They’re like sharks who go looking for prey, and when they smell blood in the water, they go nuts. There are people like this in all walks of like, not just on the SDMB, so you’d be well served to learn to deal with them now. Realize that when you act defensive, or POST IN ALL CAPS, you are letting them know they’re getting to you - which encourages them.
While I’m not a player, I admit I enjoy watching the game. But I can see you really are trying, so I’ll offer what advice I can - when you get impassioned and compose a flame post, just blank it and don’t click submit. Everyone on this board either does that or has done that. Flame posts encourage flamers. Also, try staying all in one font size. The calmer you appear, the less likely they are to attack you. Right now you don’t appear very calm.
I am calm- I wasn’t hours ago. People are responding with constructive criticisms now; if they stop, I’ll just leave again, but I won’t feel as bad this time.
I burning your in-joke!
This, I must say, is a wonderful turn of phrase, in my opinion. Carry on.