This is the same feeling I have had before. There has been no change to the furniture or anything that I have noticed. I have been using the same work chair since I started here and I have never had any kind of issues with the furniture at my apartment. My diet and physical activity have been the same for months so I don’t think that could have anything to do with it. I will write down everything I eat and drink for the next few days though, just to keep an eye on that as well. Maybe there has been a change I haven’t noticed somewhere in my routine.
Are you drinking a lot of caffeine? That can really exacerbate anxiety, if that’s what it is.
And you are right to not kick her out. Legally, since she’s been living there, she has a right to continue to live there until you evict her. You change the locks, all she has to do is call the cops and they will tell you to let her in. But you definitely should have a plan for June to regain control of your living space. Just having a plan in place should make you feel somewhat better.
Your roommate wished you dead. She accused you of rape. And now, she bounced the rent check? I’m sorry, but if you don’t get out of this lease and separate from here, you are not behaving in a sane manner. Better to live in an apartment the size of a shoebox than have someone so hateful living with you, and not even paying her own way. How can you honestly contemplate continuing to live with her until June 2009?
Texas is much closer to the equator than New York, so New England’s short winter days are unfamiliar to you. I used to get the same feeling around sunset when I was a kid, especially in the late fall, as though time were suddenly running out. Note that sunset in New York today was right about 4:30. I suspect it’s a mild form of Seasonal Affective Disorder. For me, being alone in a quiet room makes it much much worse, so try to be somewhere pleasant and bustling – or at least away from any windows – around sunset.
Try a vitamin D supplement if it really bothers you.
I never even thought about Seasonal Affective Disorder…that is an interesting thought! I will think about that too and see if maybe that could be what is causing this.
If I do stay in the lease it will be til June of 2008, not 2009, so it would only be another 6 months. I am going to go down to the leasing office tomorrow and see if I can have her name taken off the lease, and if not having her name taken off the lease maybe see if they have a 1 bedroom in this building that I could move into. They may have other solutions to the problem that I haven’t thought of yet as well. I have a feeling though that if I bring them a copy of her bounced check they will try to help me find a solution. I have an excellent rental history and fantastic credit, not to mention the fact that I am pretty quiet and don’t cause problems, so they will want to keep me as a tenant I am sure.
As far as caffiene is concerned I don’t ever have any at all. When I was 17 my doctor found cysts in my breasts caused by caffiene intake so I haven’t had anything like that almost 10 years. I am going to try to see what I can do to destress this weekend though and calm my system in hopes that maybe I can meditate the weird cactus-y feelings away or something.
Now since Jurph mentioned it, it very well may be the seasonal thing. The sun going down that early, when I’m still at work, does seem to make me a little antsy. I don’t celebrate Christmas so much as the thought that finally the days will start to get longer little bit by little bit. If that does turn out to be it, there are lights you can buy that simulate sunlight and they help a lot.