"Rabid camels: Saddam’s secret weapon!"
"Siamese Sextuplets born! Six heads, only four bodies."
"Tiny Terrorist! Six month old hijacks stroller! Dirty diapers hurled at passersby!"
U’all are posting awful fast tonight.
"Unitarian Church revealed to be male brothel!"
Valued, Watcher! Hail! I’ve been feeling so alone. 
Will you join me in creating National Enquirer type headlines?
Xylophone-playing proven to grow hair!
Yellow Journalism is Said to be More Accurate than Mainstream Newspapers!
"Yak crossed with Yeti: baby appointed Tibetan U.N. Delegate."
"Zookeeper vanishes! Pandas mysteriously start ignoring their food."
Aliens Among Us! - 10 Ways To Tell If Your Co-Worker Is An Extraterrestrial! [/Weekly World News]
The cover of this week’s issue has Saddam Hussein in a dress and reveals that:
a) He’s a cross dresser,
b) He watches gay porno, and
c) (the most damaging) He doesn’t like hummus!
Zagros Mountains not drawing tourists in record numbers this year.
Barbie doll discovered in triste with Sponge Bob.
“BATBOY ATTACKS GIRL, 10!” [/Weekly World News]
"Call of the wild! Street people form nude wolf packs!"
“Dopers’ renegade a-thread reaches 94 pages and cannot be stopped!”
Embarassed Doper apologizes again for spellling error.That would be “tryst.” Duh!
"Fraud revealed! Great Pyramid is inflatable beach toy!"
"Giant schlong washes up on beach. Scientists baffled."