First, thanks for the responses. What I was going to do with this knowledge was basically play a prank on someone. When their car wouldn’t start they would come in and say “hey, my car won’t start” and I would go out and instantly diagnose and repair the “problem” making me look like a wizard. This person is always saying I have no mechanical aptitude and I just wanted to say “in your face” Homer Simpson style. Sorry for the misapprehension.
I used to disable my own car all the time when I had a busted out window, because I didn’t want it easily hotwired.
Just swapped two of the spark plug wires so they would be out of order and the car would never start.
The Pit is for complaint and other discussion of moderator actions.
Off to the Pit.
DrMatrix - GQ Moderator
You want to fuck with someones car because you are insecure, and need to play games to feel better about yourself? Pathetic. And if the person is saying that you are mechanically inept, and you are here, asking how to disable a machine…maybe they were just calling a duck, a duck?
And yes, it would be illegal. Mayhap a lawologist can tell you what law(s) you would breaking.
Sounds like we were helping someone with their homework. “Question 1: find an innovative way to prove your mechanical aptitude.”
I agree with kree that there are legitimate reasons to disable a car; for security reasons, my parents used two of the methods I listed in the original thread. I feel a little foolish that I didn’t think to find out the legitimacy of poster’s the intent before listing those methods.
I’m not a lawologist, but fucking with someone else’s property and causing it not to work is definately cause for civil action. It might also be vandalism or something like that.
From your OP I come to an understanding that you don’t really know what you are doing. Some of the things described in your first post can really mess up a car and cost money to repair. even something as simple as swapping plug wires can lead to severe and damaging detonation. I really think you should forget about this prank.
Man, this thing took a horribly weird turn someplace. All I wanted to find out was if anyone had an easy, non-damaging way to temporarily disable a car. All sorts of people hopped in assuming bad shit about my intentions. I even apologized for being unclear. I wasn’t looking to permanently fuck up somebody’s property, day or mood. It was a relatively harmless prank; far less damaging than most and meant to produce, in the future, one of those “remember that time when…”
moments. To the folks that offered some decent suggestions thank you. To the posters who want to play junior G-men and lawboys, get over yourselves, it’s a prank on a very good friend of mine, one who actually has a sense of humor. And to the poster who wants to play amateur psychologist and call me insecure and pathetic go fuck yourself with a barbed wire cock.
???
Anyway, things to disable a car that will NOT damage it:
- Unplug crank sensor - Disable injectors
- Unplug cam sensor - Throws off sequencing of injectors, throws a code, it’ll start, but no damage is done. Simply “find” the wire and plug it back in.
- Unplug MAF sensor - PCM can’t understand why engine is cranking but no air is entering the TB. Won’t start.
- Unplug TPS sensor - PCM doesn’t know where the throttle plate is. Won’t start.
- Unplug coil wire. - Um… Disables spark too. Won’t start.
- Unplug PCM! Won’t start.
And lastly, if you don’t know what any of this stuff means, maybe you don’t have mechanical aptitude. Even though it’s mostly technical.
good luck.
FYI, I’m still learning number order too.
I think the poster is the best person to judge how his friend will react. Removing the rotor won’t damage the engine, but if the car is fuel-injected or diesel it doesn’t have a rotor. Another alternative would be to buy an “exhaust whistle” from a joke shop. You insert it in the car’s tailpipe and it emits a high-pitched noise when the engine’s running, and is also very unlikely to damage the car.
Diesel won’t, but some fuel injected cars do. Not all cars have a DIS (Distributless (sp?) Ignition System).
I stand corrected. : )
Why are people in this thread posting ways to do the acts which got the previous thread closed? Is there a certain lack of understanding here of the Rules? Lynn?
And lastcomic:
You are an anonymous poster on a message board in the ass-end of cyberspace. WE have NO idea who you are, who you intend to do these “pranks” to, nor what your overall intent is. It’s somewhat prudent to assume that it’s not a good idea to give anyone detailed instructions to (potentially) cause damage to a motor vehicle - whether by intent of the instructions, or by a mistake made whilst trying to follow said instructions.
And even if it WAS OK - look at this thread! Already, another anonymous poster here has given advise on tampering with cars, and yet they clearly really don’t know shit about cars, as evidenced by their “rotor and fuel injection” statement. Hey, I know, here’s an idea - why don’t I ask people on a message board how to perform a self-hysterectomy too…
Also, this may come as a shock to you, but if it’s illegal in your jurisdiction to tamper with someone’s motor vehicle, claiming you did it as a prank because the victim is a friend of yours is not a valid legal defense. To test this, break into your friend’s house to steal some things, and tell the nice officer that “It’s cool, dude! He’s my friend!”
Kindly “get over” yourself and grow up. In real life, actions have consequences - consequences that people have to live with.
Well said, Anthracite.
Way back in junior high, a friend of mine closed the gap on the spark plugs on my motorcycle. I thought it was a funny prank. And now that I think about it, I never properly got revenge. Is 20 years too long for payback?
You’re still learning (or NOT learning) that you’re unwelcome at this message board under ANY name, too.
And this discussion is OVER. We are not going to discuss ways of disabling other people’s property, I don’t care whether it’s “harmless fun” or not.
Lynn