Sadly, my bestfriend is this way. Her boyfriend (I suppose now he’s really her fiance` and yes, I think he too should run very far away, fast) bought her, in addition to the engagement ring he has for her on lay-a-way, a diamond ring for Christmas.
Now, you must understand. This guy works hard at two jobs, Burger King and Domino’s, and yet he’s paying out already, a $450.00 monstrosity. She decides she has to have more jewelry for the holidays, and because she’s constantly on his ass, complies.
She hands him store fliers with items pre-marked. Nothing under a hundred bucks.
I go with him to pick something out and unfortunately, she knows. She then proceeds, over the ensuing weeks, to grill me about what specifically it is and HOW much it cost.
When I won’t tell her and only divulge that she’ll like it, she responds with “Is it in the double or triple digits?” I tell her it’s more money than anyone’s ever spent on me. She keeps on, unhappy. I finally cave and say “Yep, it’s on up there, but he did get a great deal.” She’s pacified somewhat and continues to pester me about it some more.
I was appalled. And it’s not that she’s not typically a great person, but she seems obsessed because of previous relationships to equate love with cash spent. I emphasize him staying with her through all their hard times and her problems. She swears she knows, but can’t let this go.
Horrified doesn’t begin to cover it either and it extends to what she feels is appropriate for my relationship with my boyfriend. He just purchased me a ring, used, antique and for an amount she would scoff at. I’m the most blessed woman in the world though. Not for the gift, but because he loves me and for wanting to do nice things for me. All his actions I appreciate and adore so much.
I just don’t get it. So ultimately, maybe some of this stems (on both sides of the gender equation) from low self-esteem. I know that’s her issue.
It’s so sad.
