Karl storms into the safehouse and slaps the picture of his sister down on the desk in front of his case worker, shouting “Griselda, Imogene is still alive!”
“I must speak by the card, or I shall be undone,” muttered Karl with a few other choice words, as he waited for his case officer to show herself.
Brunhilde, his case officer rushed into the safe house, slamming the door behind her.
Oh, G-d, thought Karl, *please don’t make her want sex.
*
“Oh, Meine grosse brautwurst! You are here for the hanky panky, or is it business?”
“I’ve been made, Hilde. I killed two KGB agents tonight. I’m no use anynore, I’ve got to get out. My sister is alive, and we must get her out, too.”
“Oh!” Hilde exclaimed at the photograph, “For a girl who swings both ways, this is zehr gutt! Your beautiful schwester will be staying with us at the safe house, nicht wahr?”
God, this isn’t happening thought Karl, his head in his hands. This isn’t happening.
Meanwhile, Imogene tuned out her biology professor droning on, while she imagined what life would be like if she actually had emo genes.
The bell rang (which was odd because why would a university have bells to signal the end of class?) and the students stood up to file out the door. “Excuse me, Imogene,” the professor said. “May I have a word with you before you go?”
Several months passed before Imogene said, “Sure, what is it?”
“Someone from the CIA came to speak to me today.” began her Professor.
“They were asking questions about that “project” of yours that you have set up in Lab Room C3.”
Imogene’s heart began to race as she wondered if the professor or the CIA were on to her top-secrete collaboration with her twin brother Karl.
“Scientists have always been pawns of the military”, she muttered under her breath.
“Actually, the CIA isn’t military,” he professor corrected. “Of course, they are both branches of the government, but the military is part of the Department of Defense while the CIA is an independent intelegence agency that reports to the director of National Intellegence. In any case, that project in lab room C3, I would like you to accompany me to it. We must have a look at that experiment.”
Finally, Imogene realized the significance of the experiment she had started in April.
“Crap!” she cried. “What a can of worms THIS is!”
Literally. Underneath the fluorescent lights, thousands of worms wiggled within the giant can.
But they weren’t ordinary worms.
“Mein Gott!” ejaculated the Professor, 'What kind of worms are these?"
“They are nutritional, Herr Professor,” said Imogene, “it is now possible to live entirely on a diet of worms!”
“Grindal worms”, she replied. “I grow them for my aquarium fish.”
“Actually,” said the Professor after a moment’s thought, “I preferred the historical pun.”
nm