On the rare occasion I perform oral sex, this is what I use. Yes, I am married and monogamous.
I went to university in the mid 1980’s, when AIDS was just becoming publicly talked about, and the big campaigns were starting.
We had a big rally where we were talked to about safe sex, and leaflets were handed out to all, with condoms STAPLED to the leaflets!
Then the next day there was an emergency leaflet drop saying we were not to use the condoms, they had just been a symbolic gesture. Right… Wonder how many were used, anyway???
2 reasons, so I understand (caveat: IANAW):
-
some women are EXTREMELY prone to urinary tract infections. Like, all the time, at the slightest provocation. We guys don’t really have to worry about UTIs very much, b/c we have a very long urethra that keeps most stuff out. Not so for women. Hence, soap can cause irritation and then UTIs.
-
some women are very uncomfortable with their own parts. As a guy, I chalk this up to years of subliminal and overt indoctrination that sex is bad, girls who like sex are bad, girls’ sexual organs are bad, coupled with the fact that, whereas guys’ parts are right out there in the open, women have to go much more out of their way to look at and interact with their bits. So a great many women would prefer to never, ever touch those parts if they could help it, so very little washing.
I’ve experimented with douching but the results were not good. I was a teenager and I saw a sort of hot, glamourous looking woman buying a douche at the drugstore. It stuck in my head that maybe she knew something about being an appealing female so I decided to try it. It sounds stupid but…I’m pretty stupid sometimes.
I got one that smelled like vinegar because it sounded more natural than meadows. I’m not sure what appropriate meadows-smelling substance I could put in my vagina. I’m sure it’s not real flowers and grass, but whatever it is, it doesn’t seem right. I wouldn’t use flower-smelling mouthwash, after all. Vinegar just seemed more like a thing you can conceivably have inside your body. Plus some people swear by it for windows so it must have some cleaning properties.
So for a few days my crotch smelled like vinegar and I was not happy at all. I was aghast, really. I was washing and washing and the smell kept coming back. I mean, go to the kitchen right now and close your eyes and imagine a nice vagina and then stick the vinegar under your nose and tell me what you think is wrong with that vagina. Now imagine that is in your pants. It’s like something went bad. Scary. I was paranoid I had disturbed some delicate ecosystem I didn’t understand. But it wore off. I don’t really know how long it took. Time is completely relative when your vagina smells weird. It could have been weeks or just hours. Too long, anyway.
Another thing I thought about too late was the expression “grease cutting action.” It’s apt.
I work at a Planned Parenthood. We have spent many a slow evening opening and torturing condoms to see what it takes to break them–you know, bic pens, eight gallons of water, that sort of thing.
Not to ruin your next special evening or anything, but the mint flavored condoms smell just like BV*.
Bacterial Vaginosis
Um, why do you have your husband wear a condom when you give oral? Do you think your husband’s penis is ucky or something? 
As far as washing one’s privates… the best thing for washing your girly bits is the hand-held showerhead. Once I got one, I couldn’t figure out how I ever lived without it. Soap up the girly bits and the rest of the crotchal region (a soapy pouf feels nice!, then give it a good rinse down with the hand-held, making sure to spread apart the folds so you get all the nooks and crannies. hehehehe Now that’s clean!
I can’t imagine the concept of girls being so uncomfortable with their privates that they don’t wash them. That should be taught to all children by their parents at a very young age.
I’m diabetic, and occasionally I need to take antibiotics. Both of these conditions can cause yeast infections. A vinegar douche can relieve the symptoms (itching and odor) of the yeast infection, while I’m waiting for the diflucan to take effect and/or going through a course of antibiotics. Though I’m not particularly fond of smelling like vinegar, I find it less offensive than the yeast smell. I used to use a douche containing Betadine for controlling yeast infections, which was more effective than the vinegar douche, but it seems to have been taken off the market.
I find the danger of getting a yeast infection is an excellent motivation for me to control my blood sugar. I love chocolate, but the taste just isn’t worth going through that problem!
Reminds me of a little old lady who lived in a facility I used to work in. We wern’t supposed to bathe her, but because of her confusion we were to help her in and out of the shower, and verbally prompt her to wash while in there.
Here was our conversation the first day:
Me: Okay Ruby, take that soapy rag and wash your face
Ruby: ok
Me: Good! Now (yada yada, various body parts)
Ruby: ok
Me: Good! Now reach down and wash between your legs.
Ruby: :eek: Oh noooooo honey, thats delicate!
Classic. If I had any guts at all I’d use that in my .sig
I’m more partial to this part, myself:
“Imagine a nice vagina…” ::snort:: Excellent post all around, I say. 
I really didn’t want to post to it, however, a few things just drew me in, so to speak. They are, in no particular order:
soap
Soap? Like Ivory Soap? Down there? Good lord. I love my girl waaay to much to dry her out with soap. Christ almighty. I’m starting to sting just thinking about it.
…on the rare occasions I perform oral…
I don’t know your situation, so maybe your husband just doesn’t like oral, but wow. I know a few guys who are on the other end of such an ‘arrangment’. Trust me, they want it more often. Actually, I think they’d want it daily, but they’d settle for something a bit more than rare. And I’m sure they want your mouth on it sans a minty flavored barrier. But, again, I don’t know your situation…
douches
Barring infections and other odor-causing issues, isn’t pussy supposed to smell like, well, pussy? That’s what makes it so great…it smells like pussy; not strawberries or vinegar or peaches and cream, but pussy. I swear if I could bottle that and make some sort of air freshener out of it, it’d be a license to print money, I tells ya.
luck?
I’ve never had a yeast infection. I attribute this to not douching, not using anything scented in the, uh, hot zone and taking showers, not baths. But maybe it’s just luck, I don’t know.
Well, there actually is some truth to that. Many women used to use ice-water and vinegar in a post-coital douche to prevent pregnancy. Vinegar is not sperm-friendly, nor is ice-water.
Cecil once wrote a column on using Coke as a douche. He reported that Coke did kill sperm. I imagine vinegar would have similar results.
Post-coital douching is not at all as effective as modern birth control methods, but it’s better than nothing. Back in the Comstock days, that’s the only method that was available to some women.
My mother used to describe it thusly: Wash up as far as possible, then wash down as far as possible, then wash possible.
About those vinegar douches:
First of all, you’re not supposed to use full strength vinegar, it’s diluted considerably. Waaaaaaaay back when I was getting “health” class and the “birds and bees” talk it became apparent to me that the vinegar douche was mentioned at least in part as a means of weaning douching women off even more bizarre concoctions like… welll… Lysol douches. If the women insisted on douching anyway, let’s get them to use something that would cause minimal harm. Like, um, plain, clean water with a bit of vinegar to mimic the normal ph of a healthy vagina. I always heard it as “If you feel you must douche, use a mild vinegar douche”
Personally, I’ve never felt a need to do this at all.
There are times when douching is useful - in the case of certain yeast infections, as a prior poster mentioned. But it’s rare.
Washing the bits down under:
I hope it’s not as common these days, but I remember a time when all sexual aspects of a woman were considered “dirty” and girls where taught not to touch themselves “down there”. Presumably, some people took this to extremes (someone always does) and the result was women who don’t wash themselves properly.
Well, not washing those bits is sort of like not washing your armpits or behind your ears - ridiculous. I don’t advocate lathering up a bottle brush and giving the truly internal parts a thorough scrubbing, but the outer bits, while somewhat delicate compared to the palms of your hands, can certainly stand up to a little soap and water. Just remember to rinse thoroughly.
Condoms and oral sex
There are several reasons for using condoms during oral sex. A latex fetish, for example. Certain types of cancer chemotherapy leads to a suggestion of condom use because some of the nasty chemicals can be excreted in ejaculate. Also, if someone is having an outbreak of cold sores/herpes either in the mouth or on the penis it can keep them from spreading. And some women just really, really hate the taste of cum.
Well, I never in a zillion years thought I would be sharing this little anecdote, but it is strangely appropriate to this thread, so here goes…
I normally wash my crotchal area thoroughly with whatever soap I’m using for the rest of myself, rinse thoroughly, no problemo. Back when I was a teenager, and fond of using sandalwood scented soap, I washed myself a little too thoroughly, especially in the area of the vaginal canal opening. In other words, I got sandalwood scented soap up the ol’ cootchie. Aaaugh! It burned! So, I purchased a plain douche and gave myself a good rinse. And it solved the problem. And that, my friends, is the only time I ever douched.
Probably a little of both. Lots of things can spur a yeast infection, including the things you mentioned, antibiotics, wearing a wet bathing suit for too long, and random acts of Og.
But while we’re on the subject…I worked for a couple of years at a drugstore when I was in high school. One thing I noticed is that black women were far more likely to buy douches than white women. Basically, it seemed like douches were a routine purchase for many black women, while white women didn’t purchase them at all. Fast forward to a few months ago, when we were discussing things vaginal at work. (extremely casual workplace, to say the least.) A black male coworker expressed the opinion that women should douche–that it was necessary to the well-appointed cooter. My mind went back to that observation I made while working at the drugstore all those years ago. And it got me to wondering–is there a racial/cultural difference in attitudes toward douching?
The only problems I’ve had with soap on the outside was if I use peppermint soap. I adore mint, but not there. It’s an…interesting sensation.
My SO likes me just fine, so I don’t worry about it beyond a bit of soap and water.
Women are different. I have had the opportunity to examine quite a few vaginas in my time and the odors vary considerably irregardless of washing routine. A healthy woman’s bits can go from absolutely no odor whatsoever (she was older so I suspect she may have douched though I never asked) to hold your breath levels. A little odor is a turn on, as it is associated with good things :), but stronger ones can be off putting.
Some women just smell. Closely trimmed or abscent pubic hair and excellent hygiene just don’t do it for everyone. Just something you have to get use to.
I live in fear of that.
Dr. Bronner’s peppermint soap does that. It is a very intense feeling for both men and women. You get use to it though.
-
I was one of those young girls who was told never to touch down there. It was not specifically said not to do so when washing, but the implication was never. Sometime in my teen years I realized I had to.
-
No douche, nothing for me…never used it and I’m pretty sure I smell fine. I can say that with assurance since I have an SO who lives with me.
-
Do not, do not! use soap for masturbation. Just trust me on this one.
-
Mint-flavored condoms sound like something fun to do once in a while, not every time or the few times you perform oral sex! What is wrong with his penis, anyway?
Also, vaginas smell different at different times of the menstrual period. AND - even though it may smell fine and normal, it may strike your nose as vile. Smell is a very basic sense, still hard-wired into the brain, and different people smell things differently.