Age +experience=respect?

Great Debates
1

Why in this society (USA) do people cringe about their age? People lie about their ages, especially in the entertainment business and most of us make fun of older people. I am guilty of making statements like, “old bastard,” and “Silly old fool.”

You would think since I have reached middle age, I would have adopted a more tolerant attitude toward older people but I still find myself making fun of the “bluehairs.” If I am cut off on the highway by an retired driver the first thing that comes to my mind is “get the hell out of the way you old bastard.” I don’t know why these thoughts run through my head. Just impatience maybe.

I was behind an older driver the other day and I was thinking, yeah just take your time old man but please get the fuck out of my way…until I saw his tag which stated that he was not only disabled but was a purple heart recipient.

That calmed my ass down quick.

I have noticed that older posters here get more respect and benefit of the doubt than newbies and that is the way it should be. Why isn’t it that way in society? Seems like as we grow older we should gain much more respect for the wisdom of our elders, but I don’t see a lot of evidence in that direction. I could be wrong however so that’s why I am interested in hearing from the TM’s about this subject.

I Wanna Whip Your Cow.
famous C&W song

Yours truly,
aha

2

Because around here, people earn that respect. There are some folks who have been around here since the board was opened who still don’t have respect – because they are full of crap and people know it.

Same as the real world. I don’t respect somebody just 'cus he’s old. I respect somebody who has earned that respect, no matter what his/her age.

3

An eighty year old man with failing faculties is nothing more than a menace to himself and others when he gets behind the wheel. You won’t see them on a professional football team or a boxing ring for the same reason.

Unfortunately this country does not recquire an ongoing driver competancy test for maintaining a license.

Now that same person might be a grandmaster chess player, or a famous historian and deserve respect in those forums, but on a road he is just an old fool that shouldn’t be there.

To be deserved, respect must be continually earned.

4

I certainly agree David but how do we know if a complete stranger has earned our respect or not? Shouldn’t we just respect older people across the board whenever possible?

I think the point I was trying to make was, shouldn’t we give older people the benefit of the doubt at first sight? If nothing else because they have had the resources to pay their dues and remain on this planet longer than the rest of us. Instead it seems that in some cases we would rather ridicule them.

I Wanna Whip Your Cow.
famous C&W song

Yours truly,
aha

5

Sometimes when people get old they get a little goofy, or a little dotty. But they have earned that respect, anyway.

I think of my old friend Billy, who died at the age of 83, 2 years ago. He was only 4’11", but he fought it WWII, and was there for D-Day (+2, I think) and liberated some of the concentration camps in Germany.

In his old age, he was pretty sharp still, but a little goofy sometimes. His driving wasn’t the best, his memory wasn’t always the best, he sometimes said goofy things. But he had most of his marbles, and still had a lot to offer. To the casual observer, he might of seemed just like some little old jolly old man, but he was more than that, he’d earned more respect than that. He’d contributed a lot in his life, in his career.

In his last years, he liked to recall the war a lot. He liked to mention that he was a veteran … a lot. Maybe because he was short, and old, and people just sort of looked at him as some goofy old short guy, he felt that he needed to remind them of what he’d done. One time, during the big 50th year anniversary of D-Day, Billy went around all day telling people that he was there. Sure, there were specials about D-Day on the news, but some people, (especially many younger people, sorry) are clueless about history. Some young guy said something mean to Billy that day, when he was “bragging” about being at D-Day. I guess the kid didn’t realize what he’d done, maybe he was just sick of hearing Billy talk. (Billy wasn’t that insufferable, really.) But whatever the reason, it was uncalled for, and it hurt Billy. Billy deserved better than that.

Even if an older person may seem annoying, or dotty, doesn’t mean that they haven’t earned that respect, dammit.

Polydactyl Cats Unlimited
“A Cat Cannot Have Too Many Toes”

6

eh? What older posters?

7

Yosemitebabe thanks for that story, you echo my exact sentiments.

But just for the record I didn’t mean for this thread to be about old people and driving automobiles. I was sideswiped by an 80 year old lady three years ago as I stood by a car. A nano inch more and she would have killed me. Driving and old people is a whole 'nother thread.

I Wanna Whip Your Cow.
famous C&W song

Yours truly,
aha

8

Aha said:

No. How do we know? Well, if I don’t know him (or know of him), he hasn’t earned my respect. Pretty simple. It’s not just handed out willy-nilly. If all I ever see of a person is that he cut me off on the road, he has not earned my respect. Now, maybe I’ll later meet him and find out that he is a distinguished scientist who had some drug interaction problems that day. But that’s not the story in question.

No. Living long does not equal respectability. I know plenty of old fools.

I don’t ridicule people I don’t know either.

Yosemitebabe: While it’s a nice story, again, just because you may know the story doesn’t mean I do. So it doesn’t mean this man has earned my respect if he drives improperly in front of me.

9

What does this have to do with competancy behind the wheel?

It doesn’t matter if yo saved the world, if your “goofy” behind the wheel you don’t belong there, and don’t deserve any respect for it if you go there. Quite the contrary in fact.

My Grandfather is a decorated war veteran, and a former chief of narcotics for NYC. He is one tough bastard, and deserves respect. He’s also 90 years old, mostly deaf, has poor eyesite, and severely diminished mental capacity. None of this he chooses to recognize.

He continues to drive. He’s been in several accidents, and it’s only a matter of time until he seriously injures or kills somebody.

My mother and her sister refuse to confront him about his driving because “He’s a proud man.” They feel this would take away his self-respect, and independence, and their not willing to do it.

Sure he deserves respect for his past accomplishments. They don’t give him the right to endanger everybody in his vicinity though. He sure as shit doesn’t deserve any respect when he does something as foolish as drive his car.

10

The OP isn’t about older people and driving. It isn’t. If someone is too old, doesn’t have the reflexes or eyesight to drive, they shouldn’t be.

However, when someone, like my friend Billy, is rattling on about the war, or something else, some young whippersnapper shouldn’t treat them like an old fool and belittle them.

11

Yosemite:

I tend to agree with you (unless BIlly is rattling on about the war while he’s driving of course.) :slight_smile:

12

Please define old drivers. I’m about the third oldest here if I remember correctly and as far as I know the only Professional driver. CDL.
I’ve read some of your posts and can’t believe some of you consider yourselves good drivers.
I gave up long time ago argueing with people. It doesn’t do any good.
I guess Me and the other old farts will continue to go our own speed and be content to get there.
Please don’t block the roads with your wrecked autos.
By the way.I have tanker and Has Mat endorcements on my CDL.

13

Well, according to a few here, it’s not age or experience, it the # of posts to this board. Big whoop.

14

justwannanow:
As far as I’m concerend, I’m talking about old and incompetant drivers. Hopefully, you still look before you back up or change lanes, are able to see the road and go faster than 35 mph on a 65 mph highway.

If your competant I don’t care if you are 110.

Doubtless you realize that there is a connection between advanced age and diminished capacity?

If I suffered from epilepsy and could no longer operate a vehicle safely I wouldn’t drive.

Hopefully you don’t feel that you have the right to continue to drive if you get wiggy, do you.

Speaking of wrecks, I’ve been involved in two. Once an old geezer rammed my car whn it was parked in the lot at work. Apparently he confused R with D.

The second time I was stopped at a light for about ten seconds when an old guy rammed me from behind. Never saw me. Seen several near misses.

Drunk driving is universally frowned upon, but there are other forms of impairment. If you suffer from them and get behind the wheel, you are a selfish and dangerous fool.

15

Ah well then David it’s just that you and I disagree…differing philosophies as it were.

I can see that this thread is going to continue on an “older people are dangerous drivers” theme. Probably my fault for using driving as an example twice in my original post …but it was rather informative while it lasted. :slight_smile:

I Wanna Whip Your Cow.
famous C&W song

Yours truly,
aha

16

aha:

Well, I’m going along with David B on this 1.
But just because I don’t automaticly give people respect doesn’t mean I don’t give them courtesy.

I’m not sure why older folks get a bad rap in America. Maybe it has something to do with Madison Avenue’s slavish devotion to youth.

And as far as some old puke putting along at 45 in the left lane with his blinker… :wink:

Just putting my 2sense in.

Tyranny,* like Hell*,* is not easily conquered*.
-Thomas Paine (fugitive slave catcher)

17

2sense:

Well I believe that you hit upon the essence of why I feel that respect should be extended first and automatically to older people (unless proven otherwise by them that they don’t deserve it). Because to me respect and courtesy most certainly go hand in hand.

So you and I both agree and disagree. :slight_smile:

I Wanna Whip Your Cow.
famous C&W song

Yours truly,
aha

18

I realize that aha did not want this to be about old drivers but I must say that of all the unsafe things I’ve seen The between 20 and 50years old drivers are responsible for 98% of them. Yes the oldsters stand out but it is because they are trying to be safe drivers I think. IMHO thats a lot better than the ALL right get the hell out of my way because I just passed drivers ed so Im a great driver attitude that seems so prevelent.

Defensive driving is the best way to go.

19

You make a good point, justwanna.

I don’t know what the stats are on older drivers and accidents. I’m sure that if a person’s faculties are impaired, they are bound to be more at risk of causing an accident.

However, the people that really scare the hell outta me are the younger ones, with something to prove. The ones with too much testosterone (or something) and cannot stand that anyone dares be in front of them, or are more important than anyone else on the road, or whatever. Older people are maybe oblivious, but they are not full of the piss and vinegar like some younger drivers.

But…the OP isn’t about older drivers. It’s about giving someone older the benefit of the doubt…and treating them with courtesy and respect (until they prove they don’t deserve it.)

20

I suppose onr of the reasons old age doesn’t carry as much respect as it used to is that society is changing at a higher pace. Being old no longer automatically means that you can draw on a lifetime of relevant experience.

That being said, I try my damnedest to be courteous and respectful to everyone who hasn’t done anything to deserve less.

OTOH, the only people I’ve met who acted as though they had a right to be rude and condescending (sp?) were old people (and girls in bars, but that’s another story).

Norman